There’s a mental health testimony group in Hershey, PA that’s working with high school students there. It has something like 5 conferences around the US. I can’t remember what it’s called, but they’re the reason I’m sure I don’t have bipolar. The girl who was talking was saying she had 4 to 5 episodes a day where she couldn’t move. I don’t have episodes. And I’m not suicidal or self harming, though those things aren’t absolutely necessary for a diagnosis. I also don’t have mania; I’ve just always been hyperactive. I was diagnosed with adhd in kindergarten. I also didn’t get depressed until some really negative things happened in my life, so it’s not a chemical imbalance. What happened was my dad thought I should always be positive, cooperative, and obedient and he told the psychiatrist that I wasn’t at times. That was in high school. I told the psychiatrist I didn’t want to come home because my parents were oppressive and I was hoping he could tell them to back off and let me do my homework myself at the risk of not completing it and failing. He knew I was losing sleep and having random bad thoughts. But he ignored the fact that I was willfully staying up late to finish the homework, and attributed it to mania, and put me on a heavy sedative. He also attributed me avoiding home and my cynicism to depression. He also didn’t realize that I was having random bad thoughts from being half asleep, so it wasn’t really my conscious self. He could have ordered that I be forced to have a reduced courseload, but psychiatrists are all in the medication business. And the solution to a problem with a psychiatrist is not more intensive psychiatry, obviously. But that’s what happened. I know I’ve done some really stupid stuff, but it has nothing to do with my mood, just bad learning and context errors. It’s been 16 years, and now I’m forced to rely on medication to stay on social security, because the people at my last job wanted me to leave and they harassed me until I left. But the way they were doing it made my family think I was having delusions. So it was back to the chopping block. There’s a lot of other forces that are involved that I’d like to reverse so I could achieve the things I should have, but that would take a lot of power and money. (I have also tagged Autism because I was briefly diagnosed with pdd nos and treated for autism; I find that psychiatrists favor “harder” diagnoses like schizophrenia if people have more difficult lives, as opposed to looking for actual pathology) #BipolarDisorder #ADHD #Autism #Schizophrenia #SchizoaffectiveDisorder #Medication #reason #Dignity
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