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    Poem: Residency in Our Hearts

    We allow people residency in our hearts and minds. Sometimes in life we have people who are more like squatters there.
    But they are there because we, the landlords, have allowed them to take up room in our heart and mind. We focus on the hurt/offense. We are the landlord, only we can allow them there.
    We must renew our hearts and minds. Let go of any/all hurt, offense and choose to forgive.
    May they occupy our hearts and minds with a renewed mindset and love in our hearts. Choose healing. Choose freedom. Choose forgiveness.
    Live in the gift of the present.

    #IntrusiveThoughts #Anxiety #Forgiveness #Healing

    13 reactions 6 comments

    Healing Step ✨

    I am allowed to take with me the good times too ❤️ They are a part of my experience as well….and have shaped who i am today. I don’t need to feel shame or self-anger for reflecting on the good times i had with them. i can take the good with the bad & use it in my story as well.

    Romans 5:3-5: “because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

    #CPTSD #PTSD #Healing #Recovery #Forgiveness #selfforgiveness #growth #strength #character #Hope #perseverance #godseesyou

    6 reactions 2 comments
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    Today I am filled with anxiety about a million things that matter and don’t. ##I’m so tired and can’t seem to get started. Then I’m mad at myself for not getting started. Which makes me tired. See how that circle goes? It can feel endless. But I love this affirmation. It’s actually a favorite quote. #affirmative #self compassion # all I have is NOW #Forgiveness

    8 reactions 1 comment
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    #Forgiveness And The #Abuse #Survivor

    Could folks share thoughts, practical ways, forgiveness can be extended to a parental figure who leveled various forms abuse on a child, for years.

    Christ has forgiven us for much. I definitely understand that. However, I cringe every time I hear people say “just forgive them.” I cannot grasp the practical ways this forgiveness IS extended.

    In my case, I do not hold anger towards my abuser. I speak with the person. However, their control is EVER PRESENT. And therefore the abuse is ever present. I have not stopped speaking to the person. But for my sanity and emotional health, I have to keep my distance from this person. Isn’t controlling another the same spirit that expresses this control in Shane based abuse?

    I appreciate your feedback, but without the typical “forgive them so you are not a prisoner.” I am seeking practical ways Christ-like forgiveness is extended to an unapologetic person who prefers to control a relationship. Thank you!

    #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #ChildAbuse

    30 reactions 21 comments

    What others have done to me does not justify my behavior toward them, not in heaven's playbook. #TheMighty #MightyTogether #Bekind #Kindness #Forgiveness #Jesus

    5 reactions 2 comments

    Forgiving Myself for not Knowing Better #AbuseSurvivors

    When people think of forgiveness (myself included) we tend to think that forgiveness is for another person. We often don't forgive ourselves. To be clear I am not taking accountability for being abused, that is not my responsibility. However I want to work on showing myself grace. So tonight I am going to forgive myself.

    I forgive myself for not knowing what I didn't know before. I often get down on myself for not knowing what I didn't know before. I was a child when the abuse started and I didn't realize it was abuse. I remember being confused but I couldn't label it as abuse because there was no violence involved. No threats against my safety. Part of me didn't want to believe that a family member was abusing me and maybe that's why I didn't see it as abuse.

    Even so, it was not my fault for not knowing. He knew better than to hurt me like that. That's the moral of what happened. I forgive myself for getting upset with myself when I get depressed, manic, anxious, triggered or emotionally reactive. I am slowly working on these emotions by making lifestyle changes. As I got older the abuse continued and this made me feel like for some reason it was my fault. I suppose shame and guilt are normal reactions to abuse.

    But now I forgive myself for feeling guilt and shame. I realize now that I need to show myself love, patience, forgiveness and grace. So do you. I forgive myself for not speaking to myself with respect and now I plan on doing that. What do you forgive yourself for? #SexualAbuse #EmotionalAbuse #Hope #Forgiveness #Healing #PTSD #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

    19 reactions 10 comments
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    In the middle

    I feel so stuck in these questions from the image --
    "Tell me, father,
    which to ask forgiveness for:
    what I am, or what I'm not?
    Tell me, mother,
    which should I regret:
    what I became or what I didn't?"

    I have written on here before about feeling the heavy weight of potential that I haven't lived up to. I feel like I should have been able to overcome the trauma and mental health challenges. I feel ashamed of where I am at in life, so I am deliberately isolating from friends and family so I don't have to answer their questions. My therapist reminds me of all the ways I am succeeding in life, but I just can't accept it.

    I feel like I need to ask forgiveness from someone for where my life is at, but there is no one to direct that request to. Sometimes, I feel like I need to stand on top of a mountain with a bullhorn and shout, "I'm sorry! I'm just sorry!" to the world. I have no other words.

    #Potential #goals #Forgiveness #Selftalk #Relationships #Faith #MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #Trauma #CheckInWithMe

    15 reactions 4 comments

    It’s hard.

    For the last few weeks, what’s been on my mind is extending forgiveness. It’s not that I don’t have the ability to forgive my stepparent or that I don’t want to, it’s just that right now I don’t have any forgiveness to give. I read a short article about those who shame and or blame others to forgive and it made a lot of sense. Some people really think that it should be given almost instantly as if you weren’t hurt. And rushing into forgiveness when you’re not ready to do so can be damaging. I do realize now that over the years, more was/is expected of me when it comes tho things like this, especially from my mother. It’s stemmed from her comparing her life to mine. And being the eldest daughter added pressure for me because even though I have my own mind and I can be stubborn and strong willed, it often feels like that part of me just isn’t allowed. Trying to use my voice growing up was always silenced, even if I had a reason to speak up, which was so confusing. She told me to always told to speak up for myself, but when it comes to her, I’m either questioned or shut down for being too sensitive to what is said to me. I’ve been told that I’ve been “too sensitive” my whole life from people who are just as emotional as I am, but I’m the one in the wrong. I’m not seeking out to be right in my battles, I’m just trying to find the right ways to go about it because my personality is both praised and criticized by the ones who never corrected their trauma. #MentalHealth #Depression #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Forgiveness #HighlysensitivePerson #sensitive #Trauma

    59 reactions 11 comments
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    Conspiracies Of Silence

    Putting this out there for whoever needs to hear it. I am on the journey to forgiving myself. It’s hard and it’s lonely, but the silence became so deafening that in the end I had to scream and name some of the elephants in the room. Sometimes it felt like there were so many, it was suffocating the life out of me. And I learned that distance does not alter this feeling. Only the truth could free me but in saying the words, I lit my life on fire.

    Would I change it? Yes, if it would change them—but it won’t so here I am; choosing happy instead of normal 🤍

    #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #PTSD #GriefQuotes #Forgiveness #MightyBookClub #Loneliness #WritingThroughIt #selforphaned #Happiness #HappinessCanBeFoundEvenInTheDarkestOfTimesIfOnlyOneRemembersToTurnOnTheLight

    9 reactions 2 comments

    How did you forgive someone who hurt you?

    I just let my past go and wrote a letter that used empathy and compassion towards those that hurt me. I feel different but in a good way. This is the power of forgiveness.

    #PTSD #AbuseSurvivors #SexualAbuseSurvivors #SexualAssault #Forgiveness

    *As a note: I did say that their behavior is not excused and that I do not need to reconcile with them.* I think this is important.