Femoral Acetabular Impingement

The only pain I have is my right hip and my legs are very swollen cuz I have water pooling in both feet and legs. I haven't had a gummy yet. And I don't need meds. The gummies have been amazing. I'd be miserable if I didn't have them.
*Pauley went to get the mail and we got 3 packages so we opened them... 2 packages of CBD gummies and a pack of 16 servings of pumpkin spice flavor IQ Joe. I had to get it.*
So I just ate one of the gummies from today. It's a giant tub of peachie rings. I got them from Groupon. No really bad aftertaste. I'll check my hips in an hour. I'm gonna make a really fancy coffee treats. I've got a bag of pumpkin spice coffee,I've got pumpkin spice flavored sweet cream foam from Aldi, and I have a bottle of pumpkin spice creamer. I'm BASICALLY a white girl with after market software. Except you know...I'm a boy! Not to be mistaken for Pinocchio. He who controls the pumpkin spice controls the white girls. I never saw Dune but I hear they have a spice problem.
I don't feel good. I got sick twice today already. But my tummy doesn't hurt. It did an hour ago. My face is itchy flaky and oily as hell. My scalp is really itchy. It's got new scabs and they burn.
I think we're gonna watch a movie tonight. Either To Wong Foo...or What Dreams May Come.
I just took a big drag off my disposable vape and OMG I coughed so hard I almost peed my couch. Fun times. Now? Well now I'm stoned and I'm craving cheese. Like... Put a corn tortilla on a plate and put a mound of shredded cheese on it and microwave for 1 minute or until your cheese has melted. I then roll them up like a taquito. I like to dip mine in plain yogurt or ranch or sour cream. Yes I'm currently hungry but I talk about food and coffee and tea all the time so this is no different.
#FemoralAcetabularImpingement #foodieadventures #coffeeadventures

Things just keep happening to me.
Bilateral intermittent exotropia.
Bilateral femoral acetabular impingement.
My back is a dumpster fire.
Cortisone injections should last 3 months.
Mine lasted 2 and a half weeks.
PT is really not going so great.
She's afraid to damage my spine.
She's been trying to massage my hips.
Except she says my hips feel like there's marbles.
She said my hips are the hardest she's felt in a while.
I'm gonna take a gummy an hour before my appointment and see if it helps. I'm giving the gummies till Saturday next weekend. If I can be pain free for a few more days I'll be shocked.

So last night's MRI appointment didn't happen, they claim it was for the day before and I cancelled it. Except no I didn't.
The other MRI has been hitting snags. First they had to reschedule because they wanted to give my insurance a little more time to approve the PA. So I called the place where I was gonna do the MRI and they told me in order to get an MRI of my lumbar I have to first do 6 weeks of PT.
Nevermind my hips are bone on bone. Nevermind the bilateral femoral acetabular impingement. Nevermind I've tried PT for my hips a few years ago and it made it worse.
Sigh. Ok. We'll try again.
#redtape #hips

I had a video call with my pain specialist. We squeeeeeed about my hips not hurting for a week. She was so happy. She knows how miserable I've been.
Then I said now that my hips are fine, I am fully aware of how awful my back hurts. I'm supposed to have a MRI of my lumbar and then we're gonna schedule injections. She's also gonna try to help me with the musculoskeletal pain in my haunches.
I've gotta be the luckiest boy around to have such amazing doctors. My pain specialist was trying to distract me during the cortisone injections and I outed myself as a practitioner of BDSM and I am a leather puppy. She replied "so are you a Dom or a sub? Ooh or a switch." I told her I'm neither. I'm a sadomasochist service puppy who helps people express their emotions in gentle outlets with no fear of being vulnerable. She was so excited to hear. It helped me focus on something other than pain.
She's kink friendly and trans accepting. I gotta let my PCP know about my new doctor's.
#Arthritis #FemoralAcetabularImpingement #Bursitis #BackPain

Oh ok so hear me out. Banana butterscotch toffee caramel cinnabon flavored coffee.
Mind. Blown.
It's just sweet enough, I can taste every ingredient. It's silky smooth and rich. And the temperature is perfect.
I made it right before my telehealth appointment with my pain specialist. Oh she's such a a sweet woman. We talked about my back and it really just hinges on my getting the MRI done. It's scheduled for the 14th but I have another appointment that day. Even though they are hours apart my transportation only takes me to one appointment per day.
I am really glad she's my doctor. She said as soon as we get the MRI done we can schedule injections. I'm quite eager to get it done.
She looked at the X-ray and said she completely understands why I am hurting so much. Finally someone with education having compassion for me.
#hippain #FemoralAcetabularImpingement #BackPain #spinalepidurallipomatosis

Oh so the prevalence of femoral acetabular impingement is 1% but bilateral is even less. My body thinks rare health problems are Pokemon.