Trying to flip the script to my internet use, blaming the algorithm is not original or https://valid.The writing therapy is my way of expressing what cant be https://spoken.That alone, is a red https://flag.I can not speak to a Stonewall https://avoidant.Im repeating the pattern.it is https://finished.He will continue to bate me, falsified my hope and take advantage of my situation.it is https://wrong.And https://blatant.All involved are as https://guilty.I am a fool,played by a fool over pride and https://ego.Nothing more...Going after one, for another isnt strength, its blind https://faith.I am ashamed and hurt.to have people, purposefully keeping me in a perpetual state of mind,is wrong and not https://helpful.My therapists warned me of the retaliation, https://socially.But this, is https://rediculous.And the plot unraveled, for the truth was spoken"then I should leave, if its so bad".
The whole point to the https://charade.Sad.All in vein, all your effort and pretending, setting me up and then blaming me, for reacting.
To wish someone homelessness,poverty,illness and isolation, to prove a point or cover a lie,and then complain when it goes back to you, https://please.Check yourself to the nearest therapists.Seriously.
And Sorry, but if my writings trigger you, the shoe fits.
Be like me, Dont take it so personal, sweety.
I get angry very easily. I’ll admit it. It doesn’t take much — a tone of voice, a dismissive comment, a small criticism — and suddenly, I can feel it bubbling up inside me. My chest tightens, my face gets hot, and before I even know what’s happening, I’m reacting.
For a long time, I hated that part of myself. I thought it made me difficult, sensitive, or hard to love. But the more I’ve learned about myself — especially after my diagnoses — the more I understand where it comes from.
My anger isn’t really about being mad. It’s about feeling hurt. Anytime I experience even the slightest rejection or criticism, I immediately go into defense mode. It’s like my brain flips a switch and says, “You need to protect yourself before they hurt you.”
It’s not that I want to lash out. It’s that I don’t want to feel small or unseen ever again. I’ve always been a sensitive soul. When I was younger, if someone criticized me, I’d either shut down or fight back — not because I was trying to be rude, but because it hurt too much to sit with it. I’ve since learned that this is common for people like me — people with Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria (RSD), ADHD, and other forms of neurodivergence.
When you’ve spent most of your life feeling misunderstood or “too much,” even small moments of disapproval can feel earth-shattering. It’s not just emotional, it’s physical. My body tenses, my heart pounds, my thoughts spiral.
That reaction used to control me. I’d beat myself up for being “overly emotional.” But now, I try to see it for what it really is, it’s a protective response from a nervous system that’s been on high alert for too long.
Anger has layers. Underneath mine, there’s often sadness, fear, or exhaustion. Sometimes I’m not angry at all — I’m overstimulated, burnt out, or emotionally drained. But my body doesn’t always know the difference.
These days, when I feel that fire rising, I try to pause. I ask myself: “Am I actually angry… or am I hurting?” Most of the time, it’s the latter. And once I realize that, I can give myself what I actually need — space, quiet, rest, or simply compassion.
“Sometimes anger is just sadness with armor on."--Unknown
Hello there. Welcome to my mind's unkept thoughts. A disturbed sanctuary of pain, loneliness and struggles i have yet to share. I was born into a world which was not my own, alone, misunderstood, craving to be seen and chosen. Despite the trials and tribulations this life continues to offer me, i remain fighting a battle that serves to destroy me, leaving me scarred, broken, alone, tired, yet undefeated. This blog serves as my voice, my way of shedding light on the monsters within. To those fighting the battles which remain unspoken , know that you are never alone, as we all have monsters in our closets. We are the conquerors of our fate, the warriors to our minds battles and the survivors of our darkest moments.
#Depression #Anxiety #Loneliness #Pain #overthinking #Paranoia #Stress #tired #anger #lonewolf
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I wanted a private and secure email hosting service, so I went with Mailfence a while ago. For some reason, I haven’t received all of my clinic’s emails, so I’ve found that you could whitelist them and maybe it’ll works. Unfortunately, that’s behind a paywall subscription, which I don’t freaking get. But I still looked at their subscriptions plans anyway and saw that they were pretty low, like one plan was almost $3 per month. I thought “well, that’s not too bad, I guess”. And then….. the next page told me that I would be paying for EVERY 12 MONTHS! So it was really $31.50 a year! It said NOWHERE else that it was a yearly subscription until this very moment. Are you fucking KIDDING ME?!?? I cannot pay all of that up front, we’re already paying for other shit. And of course, email and phone support is locked behind those fucking subscriptions, too. Unbelievable!!! I’ve spent so much fucking time trying to find an alternative to the evil Gmail from evil Google, only to be shitted on by “oh let’s pay so much money for this thing now” for the MILLIONTH TIME!! I ain’t paying that much for a fucking email service, like come on! Shouldn’t privacy and security be a FREE thing?!?!
Way too many businesses are expecting too much from us these days. Why the fuck does everything cost so much these days (both on the internet and in the real world)? What happened to stopping poverty, you’re only just strengthening it?? And I don’t wanna hear any of these companies say “oh, 2020 was rough and-“ IT’S 2025!! And even so, you didn’t need to skyrocket your prices up THAT high. And now you’re locking actually useful shit behind a paywall, too?! This enrages me. A simple WHITELIST feature is LOCKED BEHIND A DAMN PAYWALL. That’s ridiculous.
I feel like almost every fucking company is so money hungry these days, just fucking stop. Please. We’re NOT fucking made of money! Capitalism has gotten too far, at least in the US here (which I’m very unfortunate of living in as I strongly hate this country as an American), and I’m not just saying that because I’m anti-capitalist.
#anger #MoneyIssues #Anxiety #Vent #inflation #Vent #triggerwarning #MyAutismIsNotADisability #MyAutismIsNotADisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #AutismSpectrum #Awareness #inflation #CapitalismHasGottenTooFar #StopThis #enraged
I'm angry.
Anger fueled by rage, I'm constantly screaming on the inside. Anger made me "dramatic". Anger made me "disrespectful". Anger made them uncomfortable.
So I buried it. I buried it so deep that I didn't even know it existed. I buried it so deep, I forgot what they did to me. Waking up every day believing that it didn't happen, yearning for love and affection.
But here's the truth I'm learning now: My anger is not the problem. My anger is the part of me that now remembers I deserved better.
I'm angry that my boundaries were ignored.
I'm angry that my voice was stolen.
I'm angry that I was made to believe everything was my fault.
This anger doesn't mean I'm bitter - it means I'm finally in a safe space to feel what I couldn't back then.
It rises in waves, not to destroy - but to release. To unfreeze my body. To burn away the silence. To make space for something new.
I'm angry that I had no guidance, no love, no regulation, no understanding. I got nothing from them.
It was all a lie.
Anger, rage, hatred are all normal emotions to feel when healing Trauma of any kind. What sets you apart from the abuser, is learning to let it go when it doesn't hurt anymore. Understanding that it was never personal.
I'm learning to let it burn through me, not consume me.
I don’t know for sure what will result-.but I have my opinions-
I have a difficult time w making a scene
People already know i have issues-this is enough for me to live down—
Some people simply don’t care
I am concerned the way things will turn out for me - similar to the way my life used to be before I had my issues.
other people may say how difficult a particular person is-( someone I am having a lot of difficulty w) or stand up to this person for me-just as before- I don’t k know this for sure-
-But this is what I think what will happen - trying to count my blessings here-.but it is kind of difficult right now-
If so. I were through all I went through-for what????!!!
Maybe that i can feel like this horrible difficult ordeal is over??? Idk. W no children, a roommate for a husband- have to county blessings somewhere- best for me to be away from my siblings right now i think
I know i can’t stand up to him w/o creating a scene bc i tried and he called me an $$$$$ to my face- in front of anybody who was around- there was nothing wrong w the way i said it- I was fine- he shouted it . So that door is closed
I am at the mercy of everyone around-maybe they won’t care-I kind of don’t- not anymore-
The person who asked me( everyone ) for advice-I could not find your text now-
I suggested the living room- it is a place to go where you can go and talk to peer support- they are trained- I am not- idk - but I don’t think most people here are-w a place such as the living room- they can help direct you to a good option-
In my opinion- I would have been a lot better off-If I had seen a social worker or a psychologist- who would have helped me cope.but then what would have been the results??
I can try standing up to this person again- I am spent. I just really don’t care anymore-
Unless I th ink about it.
I’ll be glad it’s over and I have a roof over my head and a life to enjoy. My husband and I do enjoy our lives- I hope and think. And definitely- should not be last - I have some very wonderful friends!!
Life goes on..
That first Dr - In the first hospitalization- opened me up-I used to hold things in-
Now I let everything out-
Now- I lose friends bc - they can’t handle me - when I let things out- I have to choose friends who can handle me letting my feelings/ upsets out- I simply can’t hold things in anymore- not after that first hospitalization-
The friends I have to chose - who can tolerate my outbursts-I have a hard time handling- I don’t like them-
What other choices do i have??
More & more medicine??
Hi, my name is Jessie C. Love. I'm here because I live with
#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDisorder #Migraine #PTSD #Grief #anger
My mom and sister and I were having a conversation and not only were they both being judgy towards me… excuse me I made mistakes and I learned my lesson, even if they were really shitty mistakes. My mother always urges me to stop looking for partners. But like isn’t that what guys do? I came out as transgender male 3 years ago and they still have a hard time accepting. But I think this is more to control me as she is toxic. Had I not looked I wouldn’t have found my exes or the dates I also had. I’m annoyed because I literally feel like she doesn’t want me to live my life. Or maybe she’s jealous of me still. Idk. #anger #NarcissisticPersonalityDisorder