A key question…
What did people here who felt deeply suicidal, do to overcome doing the baleful deed? pls suggest #SuicidalIdeation #Anxiety #Fear #melancholia #Shame
What did people here who felt deeply suicidal, do to overcome doing the baleful deed? pls suggest #SuicidalIdeation #Anxiety #Fear #melancholia #Shame
How many masks do you wear have in your daily life. #Anxiety #chronic illness #Fear
# depression
I have not posted in a while on The Mighty. Lately, my anxiety has been on high. I have just been to a wedding of a friend with my parents, and it makes me realize that I have been alone for a long time. I have never had a girlfriend, mostly due to anxiety, fear, and my autism getting in the way and also fear of being judged and be made fun of due to my autism and also being obese.
It is not fun thinking like this. I want to date, but I cannot find anyone who I like? It is hard to date when you are in your mid-30s like me. What should I do?
I am terrified about what’s going to happen next.
Long story short 2 nights ago I had an hr meeting about my 2 colleagues that had a conflict at the beginning of the month, gave another statement as a witness and I was guaranteed that my name will never surface but I’m simply terrified about what’s going to happen next.
If my name will never surface from that statement it’s going to be good for me but if t my name reaches the surface I’ll go again through a trauma which I don’t think I can relive.
Being a witness in the conflict between the 2 colleagues (Y and X) in which Y bullied me constantly for 9 months, my head can’t go further that the next statement: he’s gonna find out that I give another statement and he’s gonna make my life a living hell.
I am stressed and anxious again, it’s over my understanding l, the worst thing is I can’t ask for help due to the fact that I am alone and I can’t trust anyone, I’m shy af as well 😔
From doing the right thing and as well telling my managers that I will not give another stat because it affects my mental health too bad to talk with hr about it and repeating again in more details it managed to terrify me, to have nigh terror again, to be afraid, to have anxiety attacks.
Beside all the crap is happening rn in my life with my mom, being so judgemental I can’t deal again with work problems.
I am again in a bad situation and I don’t see any escapes 😔
#AnxietyAttack
#Depression
#Fear
Fear
They say it’s innate
For both sinner and saint
But can you relate,
When I say its all,
running through my veins
Like the hugs in the womb
Till you first breathe life
Or the sweet teeth you break
When you were just five
The time you dressed up
In your favourite tee and tights
Black nail color,
You thought you looked nice
But No on told you
About the monsters in plain sight
Or how the constant state of fright
Will imprison your mind
Leaving you forever afraid
Of the pretty nights
The times you tried to be loud
With a fear of missing out
Of not letting the world see you
Just Because you’re in doubt
Fear of not being enough
Giving all your love with nothing in return
It can be rough, but love
Is nothing but dumb luck
Fear of uncertainty
Of being judged on your profanities
Unsure of the potential
You get hopeless of the reality
But Fear
Can we escape?
Or will we end up losing
The constant race?
I was diagnosed with Borderline personality trait disorder about 3 years ago, right when the first lockdown started.
I've done some therapy but long story short- I haven't seen a therapist for almost a year now.
I thought i was doing alright but now that I'm on brink of loosing love of my life, I realize I haven't been good for several months now.
We are currently on a break, Im back in my home country for 2 month now, studying to become a florist and reflecting on all the damage Ive done. Of course trying to figure out ways how both of our expectations could be met and he wouldn't leave me.
After bunch of self reflection Ive realized that I actually never research what is BPD, cause I didn't wanted to get influenced by my diagnosis.
But now that I started reading this book "I hate you- Don't leave me", Im honestly a bit conflicted, cause Ive never had the typical relationship cycle in this current relationship(almost 8 years) that others with BPD expierence. Ive never tried to break up with him, he has multiple times, which obviously made my abandonment issues higher with each time, but Ive never had explicitly told him I'm done and fled.
I understand that Im the clingy BPD type, but even those people usually shut their partner out and leave.
For me, my partner is the one that keeps me going and loosing him, opens doors that I don't ever want to open, because of fear what's behind them..
Talking to my 18 year old son earlier today, he told me he wanted to give me a heads up about something. I was like oh Lord no he's gonna tell me he's gonna propose to his girlfriend. He isn't. Crisis averted. #TheMighty #MightyTogether #relief #Fear #Horror
Stuff is hard these days with so much suffering and uncertainty. And when you're not as healthy as you'd like, it makes all the burdens of life heavier. Please know that whether you're dealing with a physical condition or your mental health or both (who isn't?) someone cares. Even if that someone is me, this random person on the internet. Maybe that's not much, but it's true. I care that about you and your well being. Peace and all good.
#MightyTogether #FamilyAndFriends #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Depression #Anxiety #MentalHealth #SuicidalIdeation #CheerMeOn #CheckInWithMe #RareDisease #CPTSD #Fear #MyalgicEncephalomyelitis #COVID19
I woke early this morning with typical questioning thoughts. I then thought of listening to a sermon on a Podcast, but changed my mind because those words typically lead me to more questioning thoughts filled with self reflection, self awareness, and sadly self-lead conviction. But today I want to hear and join in with speaking good words said about our Heavenly Father. So, I turned to #TheMighty to share words of kindness with my Heavenly family to our Loving Lord and Savior!
Loving Father, thank you for sharing your Son with us. Your Trinity is so loving and giving. Thank you for being faithful. Thank you for bending and extending yourself to reach us on our level. As my tears drip because of some challenge I face on this broken realm, Father, your Great Comforter seems to caress my wet face as a gentle wind cools the feverish emotional energy my anxiety sweats.
You are love. You are NOT the voice I often hear in the racing thoughts in my mind, for they are fueled by fear or panic. No. Lord, you are the voice that tells me “peace,” as you add, “Be still.” There is no panic in you. There is no rushed decision expected of us, those who trust in you. Your timing is perfect. I can wait in you.
And in our times of uncertainty, we run to you as our fear mounts. But you allow us to almost disturb you as you reach out to another in their distress. You take the time to whisper to us, “Your faith has made you well.”
I drop before you sharing my accusations of yet ANOTHER time I caught my self cheating, an betraying act unlike you. But you simply push the dirty soil of such internal anguish away. My words begin to fade, for no one is without sin. You stand by me. I hear your whispered words, “Where are your accusers?” All thoughts disappear. With confidence, I know I can “go” and “sin no more.” My actions are exposed. I then drink in Your Living Water. And I go out and I declare to all I encounter in my world, “Jesus speaks! And he knows EVERYTHING ABOUT ME!” Your Truth has set me free!
May we all gather together to boast and proclaim each of our encounters we have experienced with our Heavenly Father, his Son, and the acts and guidance of his Great Comforter. As the song Agnus Dei plays in my ears, “You are Holy…Lord God Almighty…Worthy is the Lamb…Are You Lord God Almighty.”
#Anxiety #Fear #PTSD #CPTSD meet #peace #patience and #Love !
I am scared as hell about someone. Had a dream about them a couple nights ago that they had a medical emergency and didn't make it. Then I realize they have been MIA for a week. Reached out but no acknowledgement which is unusual. I am crying. Been praying like hell. Trying to trust God. There's a song that came to mind and am striving to do this even though it is so hard to do.
Even when the fight seems lost
I'll praise You
Even when it hurts like hell
I'll praise You
Even When It Hurts - Hillsong #TheMighty #MightyTogether #scared #Worried #Concerned #Heartbroken #Fear #Crying #FearOfAbandonment #trigger #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder