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Food Anxiety #InflammatoryBowelDiseaseIBD

I have Ulcerative Colitis and Irritable Bowel Syndrome. I have been in remission for a while now. Yet, I still suffer everyday. 80% of the time I eat #Glutenfree . I don’t drink soda, alcohol, or even many juices. If I do have juice I usually water it down. I switched to a limited about of decaf coffee with almond milk, or almond creamer. I have an entire mental food/drink list that are “Okay” and “NOT Okay”.

I still have days where I feel like I’m going to shit my intestines out of my body. Pain so bad that I will literally undress while sitting on the toilet because I feel as if I am going to pass out. I have days where my abdominal pain is worse than any labor pain I have ever had. It really sucks. It sucks because I hate feeling so ill and exhausted. I hate being so limited. I also hate it because I love food. My favorite is chocolate pastries, cakes, and truffles. Sugar is such a huge NO NO when you’re having symptoms with UC or IBS. I legitimately now have a love/hate relationship with food all together. For so many years no food has been directly associated with pain that I hate to eat. Even more recent, this year my traditional “go to” foods, and snacks have been bothering me now. I feel like I can’t enjoy anything. Twice this year I had to go to the ER due to black beans! My favorite are raw veggies and salads. Talk about feeling F***ed up! The bloating doesn’t help either. It is so hard to even muster up the strength, the courage to eat a simple snack let alone a meal.

Food has had such a strong impact on my life. I grew up loving food, all kinds of foods. Now, I have so much #Anxiety tied to food that I struggle to even enjoy the things I was once did. I just want to enjoy something basic like #Glutenfree cereal without feeling like I’m going to pass out and shit my pants. I do my best to breathe through it like you would during childbirth but, damnit the pain is annoying. WTF bod! Just act right for one F***ing day! The only plus side to my misfortune is that it has made me live outside my comfort zone A LOT! I have tried different foods, different diets, and what not, and in turn my kids have had access to a lot of different things. We often bake gluten free foods from scratch which has encouraged my kids to cook as well as be self sufficient in the kitchen.

I just wish I wasn’t so afraid to eat all the time. I miss being able to let loose with my dietary restrictions here n there. For some reason this year my body seems to not want 70% of what I eat. I could’ve eaten a steak weeks ago and today it messes me up. Or I could’ve been fine with pasta sauce and right now for some reason it’s too much. It’s like make up your mind and stick to it lol. Come on self, why can’t we be friends??? #UlcerativeColitis #IrritableBowelSyndromeIBS #dietarysensitivities #diet #Foodanxiety #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #InflammatoryBowelDiseaseIBD #FoodRestrictions


My Dietary Sensitivities Are Not Fads

In my first job, I met a toxic colleague who attempted to ridicule my dietary sensitivities in his process to bully me out of my job. At the time, I would occasionally talk about my experiences with a diet to help lose weight for my symptoms of PCOS. He would respond with mockery and sarcastic comments, being the insecure, social misfit that he was, craving attention.

His stupidity wasn’t just his own. There are plenty of people on this planet who fail to recognise the importance and impact of good dietary health. Junk food, fast food and chain restaurants have spread grand amounts of misinformation, preventing individuals with dietary sensitivities from understanding, seeking meaningful support for and treating dietary sensitivities.

I only discovered my dietary sensitivities in my 20’s, following the diagnosis of PCOS and insulin insensitivity. It was years after I had first been exposed to the concept of healthy eating, where I was never taught the reality of having a dietary insensitivity and what it could mean for my life and wellbeing.

A lot of why alternative medicine and cultural “fads” are linked to dietary insensitivities is to discredit a genuine dietary sensitivity. Imagine, if more and more individuals began to investigate their dietary sensitivities. We would have a less commercialised eating experience and a more tailored eating experience. Many, many restaurants and catering companies would be closed down.

I am sensitive to dairy, gluten, soy, artificial additives, preservatives and colourings, sucrose and high fructose corn syrup as well as saturated fats. These are not fads. These are toxic for me and they cause a number of physical reactions, ranging from stomach cramps to full-body hirsutism, androgenic alopecia and anxiety and depression.

I have dietary sensitivities. I am not a compulsive dieter or cultural fad fiend. Not even remotely. I stand for the individuals who are treating their dietary sensitivities and strongly condemn any and all efforts to discredit and discriminate against any individual seeking to do so.