Neverending

Just realizing my friends are all moving on In life and I'm always stuck. Going around and around in circles. Can't get out. Then I try to divert and change direction but it's still a fucking circle. #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Depression #Neverending

Is 5mins where I dont want to cry is all im asking for. 5mins where the voices shut up and I can have peace. Is 5mins too much to ask for... #Depression #sad #Suicide #Neverending

So, as I sit in my car in yet another Walmart parking lot, alone and waiting.
The circumstance that got me here summed up, is I live in an apartment and my landlord has had a plumber to come and evaluate the toilet. Well, it is currently Monday January 1, 2019 and not being able to be at my home because the plumber needs equipment that won't arrive until Thursday, hopefully!!!
It is a horrible situation. Not one you want, especially in the middle of the night after you've taken medicine for a good night's sleep. Oh, wait no can't do that... If I need to drive anywhere to a public restroom because I'd be medicated.
So today we'll not count it as a bad start to the year, because I never accomplished anything worthy of noting today.
Except the fact that I need to be more educated about renter's rights , you'd think the landlord would have to place me in a hotel?
I honestly don't know, and we all that deal with any form of #MentalHealth issue know, Is that I just feel today like I can't possibly handle one more thing that's negative.
#thestruggleisreal #Neverending & is a #pia (pain in the axx literally and figuratively)!!! 🎉 Happy New Year to all and to all a good night as I speed out of sight in search of the nearest public fesitivities (no., Facilities) 😎😱🤔

See it could be worse. Because, normally I'm sitting outside Walmart working on my anxiety boiling up as I want and need to go inside, but this time is was just the most convenient parking lot to my overnight facilities available place I'm heading to soon!

This is my first post here, so please be kind. I’m trying to recover from a narcissistically abusive relationship and I’m in all kinds of pain. Both physical and mental. I know all about narcissism. He’s been in my life for about 20 years. My first love. He periodically comes back into my life, promising me something better, the moment I begin to fall, he ghosts. My family is fragmented. I do have support from my mum and an Aunty, but that’s where it ends. I keep my pain pain private. But I’m falling apart. I just want to sleep. I also have fibromyalgia. Diagnosed over 2 years ago. That just feels like someone is rubbing salt into the wound.

My anxiety plays up at the worst of times. Mine stops me from eating. looking, smelling or even thinking about food makes me want to throw up. I used to let this rule my life as it lead to me eating not much at all ever. I got better (ish). I feel it slipping back. I wasn’t hungry today. I wasn’t hungry yesterday. I threw up yesterday with the panic in my stomach. #Anxiety #Sickness #Neverending