Stupid angry feelings
I don't have transportation. I rely on my friends to take me out to go to events. But none of my friends are spiritual. And the events I desperately need to attend are spiritual. So I can't go. And this is really upsetting me. My soul hurts and needs nurturing. My faith is so important to me.
So I decided to host a pagan potluck at the park that is right behind my apartment. It's scheduled for August 5th. I posted the link in some pagan groups on Facebook... And asked people to spread the word. I don't know if anyone will attend but all I can do is try. I've got my fingers crossed.
I'm so stressed out that I developed a stress migraine. I have had a really rough day today. I'm on day 4 of a Crohn's flare. And I've got a bad flare up of herpetic whitlow so my hands are really itchy. I've got so much on my mind. I'm going to a convention in September and I have to figure out how I'm getting to the airport on my own. And I need to buy a suitcase. I think maybe I can get by with just a big duffel bag. I dunno. Lots to do next month to get ready.
Tomorrow I have a neurologist appointment to address my migraine frequency. Last month I had 25 days of migraines. I'm stressed out about the appointment because I have to take transportation through my insurance and it's usually late so if I'm late to my appointment they'll cancel it. I'm just hoping I get there on time.
I've also got a flare up of really bad seborrheic dermatitis on my scalp, face, eyebrows, and inside my ears. I will see my dermatologist on Friday. I hope there's something else I can use for it. I've been using ketoconazole shampoo for almost 2 years and it doesn't help at all.
I feel alone. Like I have no friends to turn to. I don't have much in common with them. I'm trying to make new friends in the pagan community. I am also in a few trans Michigan groups but most of the members are trans girls. I need guy friends. I've only got one guy friend and he works 7 days per week. I have seen him once in the last 3 months. I don't really know how to make friends... But I'm trying.