I am re-editing my blog and removing all old post to write in a new style And with new goals. I have a hard time finding my voice in thithis trying times. I am really struggeling with a writers block. I hope it will soon get better.
##Blogging #writersblock #Depression ###Chroni ##ChronicIllness
When my Fibromyalgia would flare it would go through an entire process in minutes. First came a general feeling of unwell like the start of a flu or virus Then the pain would start. Every fiber of my being would erupt in agonizing pain. Pain that made you sob. Then the chronic fatigue would kick in. There would not be any position I could lie in to alleviate any of the pain. When the pain would alienate enough that I could get up maybe 3 days later all I wanted to do was sleep. Eating would be too much exertion. A flare could start for a variety of reasons such as overworking stress being on a train or plain where I couldn't move around to take pressure off body part loud noise. #Fibromalgia ##Chroni ##Chroni #Stress
i discovered microdosing of psilocybin, & today for the first time in 4 yrs i reduced my opiate dosage more tha 50% with no ill effect, i had no sense of being high i just felt good almost normal,no pain all day. the capsule contained turmeric, black pepper & a tiny dose of psilocybin. in my youth 50 yrs ago i used mushrooms a few times so i know what the high is like & there was none of that, i couldn't feel a thing, just better & pain free, it has been wonderful, i even feel like i can get off the opiates (dilaudid mostly, very strong) as i had no feelings of withdrawal even though my dose was high enough to put most people on the floor, it's almost to good to believe.
#CheckInWithMe
Depression isn’t permanent, but it has been attached to my soul for so long, that I feel like it won’t ever go away. Sometimes when I wake up, I wonder what was the point of continuing to fight? My life is just passing me by and I’m running out of time, to finally get to experience finding myself, and to create a great life for myself. I feel like I’m stuck in a nightmare that will never end. #on #Anxiet ##Chroni #ain #Living #LivingWithPOTS
There are days I feel down and on top of overthinking I think how nice it will be to have 7 days of feeling “good”. Just 7 whole days, 168 hours of my just feeling good.
I’m angry and angry enough that it put me in tears. I know people talk and not everyone likes me but my head assumes that no one likes me and everyone is talking about. Of course, this is the case to where someone decided to talk to me like I am a child at work!
After a weekend of actual fun with my best friend and showing her around LA I was in probably the best mood I’ve been for a while until today. Someone always does something to trigger my anger and depression and making me feel unworthy. I will be fine but I had to vent.
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