AllorNothing

I really easily get locked into all or nothing thinking which can result in a lot of self-condemnation. Back in March, as soon as I got on a public health insurance plan, I visited the local mental health resource centre. They said I could be eligible for group therapy, but there was a wait list and then there was also a further delay due to the pandemic. They called me in July when I had just moved, dealing with a new work schedule, struggling to balance everything - and I kept forgetting to call them back. I convinced myself that this meant I had lost out forever and it was all my fault because I had failed (once again) to follow through like a mature, responsible adult. (Sorry for the negativity - but these are the thoughts that go through my mind...)

Just now, someone from the centre called to ask if I was still interested in group! I'm feeling settled in my new apartment now, my job schedule has sorted itself out, and feeling as ready as I'll ever be for something new. It probably won't start until November, and it will be on Zoom. They will contact me by email instead of phone which will be much easier for me to manage (less anxiety).

Sooo, please pass on your tips for a good group therapy experience! I want this to be a helpful and hopeful step forward for me, but I'm definitely a bit nervous about it too.

#secondchances #GroupTherapy #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #AllorNothing #sharingiscaring

My therapist wants me to take my negative thoughts and “pop them” then twist them into a positive one. It seems impossible; I just think of even more negative ones as to why I can’t possibly do this.
#NegativeThinking #Therapy #AllorNothing

Moods are like waves. Sometimes you can ride them, and sometimes you drown......

Then there's me: " When did I get in the water?" xD ......

(A list I recently wrote during a hypomania episode to distract myself)

Write a blog entry on my trip to Egypt
Write something about my feeling during mania
Write to my therapist
Listen to music
Drive around with my bike listening to music
See my boyfriend
Listen to my favourite singer (Mylène Farmer)
Sort my house and my clothes
Photoshop pictures on the laptop
Open a blog
Smoke shisha, smoke, drink coffee
Not to sleep
Not to go to work at all
Go to work and do all my assignments veryyyy wellll
Check up on Instagram
Volunteer in an NGO
Learn Arabic
Learn Spanish
Learn Arabic
Learn Spanish
Drink beer
Cry
Talk again to my ex-boyfriend
Listen to sad music
Write my feelings down etc
Make order in my phone
Helppppppppppppppppppppppppppp

#allatonce #AllorNothing #tired

I push and pull at relationships meaning I push people away from me yet at the same time I’m pulling them into me. It feels like I’m saying I absolutely hate you just don’t leave me. It’s a cycle a vicious cycle that keeps happening.