Mania

4 Physical Signs of an Impending Manic Episode
4 Physical Signs of an Impending Manic Episode | bpHope.com

So recently I was diagnosed with ADHD. It is another thing I need to adapt to. I also have a severe case of anxiety and manic depression. I do have more good days than bad, and I think I handle things well on those good days. It’s the bad days I have to learn to cope with. #ADHD #Anxiety

After coming down from my first ever major manic episode, I received disheartening news from my employer that I was let go. At that time, I have spiraled deep myself into depression that it seems impossible to get out of. I feel extremely suicidal ever since then. I didn’t have the mental clarity at that time, but a job loss shouldn’t cost me mental health or my life. it is just silly from hindsight. After months of bed rotting , social isolating , being in mental pain and struggling with suicidal thoughts . I realized that my mental health problem has become far worse than I initially realized: my cognitive functions have severely deteriorated to the point where I can’t seem to hold any conversation with anyone. I don’t know how to connect with anyone anymore. What’s worse is that I have problems recalling words and forming coherent sentences. I don’t even know how to speak to waiters when I tried to order food and inquire about the dishes. I have lost essential and basic skills as a human. This realization has pushed me to an edge , now my suicidal thoughts are stronger than ever. How can I even survive in this society as someone with such little to none communication skills ? How can I make friends when I have nothing in my brain. My brain is just so empty that it is so sad. I am one step away from taking my own life. I truly need help on how to restore my cognitive functions . This seems like forever. I feel scared because I don’t want to put my parents through extreme emotional pain, but the pain I am feeling has outweighed any other concerns I have. I am sorry that I am selfish. But before I kms, I do wanna try getting better. Does anyone have any guidances on how I can regain my cognitive functions and my language, communication skills? Also I feel extremely extremely lonely it is horrifying. #Bipolar #Suicide #Depression

Being a mom is already a full-time, no-days-off, ride-or-die commitment. But being a mom with bipolar disorder—who’s clawed her way out of addiction and still wrestles with manic episodes? That’s another level. That’s a battlefield most people never see. And if I’m being honest, most people don’t want to.

There are so many misconceptions floating around—about addiction, mental illness, and motherhood. People want to box me in: either I’m an “inspiration” or a “hot mess.” Nobody talks about what it really feels like to live in this body, raise kids with this brain, carry this past, and still get up every damn day and show the hell up.

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This Isn’t a Diagnosis. This Is My Life.

Let me be clear: bipolar disorder is not just mood swings or a bad day. It’s not “Oh, she’s just being dramatic.” Nah. It’s racing thoughts that won’t shut up. It’s impulsivity that makes your heart race. It’s full-blown mania that convinces you that you don’t need sleep, food, or anyone’s advice—including your own damn intuition.

And when you’re a mom in the middle of that storm? You don’t get to opt out. You still pack lunches. You still read bedtime stories with a voice that shakes. You still smile while your brain’s on fire.

Now layer that with addiction. Years of it. The kind that costs everything—relationships, dignity, custody, self-worth. I didn’t start using to be reckless. I used because I was trying to survive a life that already felt impossible. I was trying to quiet what I didn’t have the language to explain.

But I got clean. Not once. Not easily. But for real. And I’ve stayed clean. Through temptation. Through trauma. Through the kind of stress that makes relapse feel like a warm, familiar hug. Still, I don’t pick up. Not because I’m superhuman, but because I’ve got kids who look at me like I’m their whole damn world—and I refuse to disappear on them.

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What People Don’t See (But Should)

There are moments of joy in this chaos—real, steady joy. When my daughter climbs into my lap, safe. When my son belly laughs in the other room. When I realize I’m building a life I used to dream of, sober.

But those aren’t the only moments. There are also moments of complete exhaustion. Of overwhelm. Of shame. Of silence so loud it roars.

I wish people understood that living with bipolar disorder while parenting through trauma and addiction recovery isn’t a story of failure or strength—it’s both. It’s not a clean-cut success story. It’s a jagged, bloodstained, still-writing-the-ending kind of truth.

You don’t get to call me “strong” unless you understand what that strength cost. Unless you’ve seen me cry behind a closed bathroom door just to make it through the day.

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What I’ve Learned the Hard Way

✦ Self-care isn’t a luxury. It’s how I stay alive.

Not the cute, influencer kind of self-care either. I’m talking real-deal survival: sleep, therapy, boundaries, saying no even when it pisses people off, canceling plans when I feel like I might unravel.

✦ Vulnerability is my superpower.

I used to pretend I was okay, even when I was falling apart. Now? I’m done with that. I speak my truth—even the messy parts. Especially the messy parts. Because pretending doesn’t help anyone. Honesty connects us. It reminds people they’re not the only ones drowning.

✦ Healing isn’t linear.

There are days I win. Days I just make it through. And days I barely survive. All of those are valid. All of those count. Progress is messy. So is motherhood. So is recovery.

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To Anyone Walking a Similar Road:

Be kind to yourself. Stop comparing your pain to someone else’s highlight reel. Stop pretending you’re fine when you’re not.

You don’t have to be “strong” every day. You just have to keep going.

There will be backslides. There will be dark days. But there will also be light—real, warm light that breaks through when you least expect it. And when that light shows up? You’ll realize you are the one who created it.

You are not alone. You are not broken. You are becoming.

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The Realest Truth I Know

Being a bipolar mom in recovery isn’t some motivational tagline. It’s a complicated, exhausting, beautiful, infuriating, joyful, terrifying journey. But it’s mine. And I’ve earned every scar.

So next time someone says, “Wow, I don’t know how you do it…”
I’ll smile, and think:
“Neither do I. But I do. And that’s enough.”

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Want to support someone like me?
Educate yourself. Ask real questions. Show up. Offer help without judgment. Don’t assume the worst—or the best. Just be there. And if you’ve lived this life too? I see you. You are not invisible. You are not alone.

We’re still here. Still fighting. Still mothering. And that? That’s power.

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🖤 Kavi

Hi, my name is Curiosity_Curls. I'm here because I recently came off my anti depressants to see if they were causing me to go manic unfortunately have become very depressed so being put on other medication but just part of the journey we are all on

#MightyTogether #BipolarDisorder #PTSD #Migraine #Anxiety

I had a partial hysterectomy with an oophorectomy (removal of both ovaries)yet I still have one left... I went into “instant” surgical menopause. I was diagnosed in 2018 with a very rare form of uterine cancer. Which means usually full hysterectomy and most likely also losing my ovaries and fallopian tubes. However the DR I went to was very stupid in my defense. Anyways they found my tumour and it was a huge 15cm x 30cm in size and they removed that along with 1 ovary,and tube. Then during labor with last kid I begged for a C-section in which my request was ignored and I had a uterine prolapse . Drs told me by 2028 if left untreated the cancer would very much likely spread through out my body and possibly kill me. I'm not living my best life by no means but I'm 34 have 4 children living one stillbirth 3 boys 2girls. Yet I'm very thankful to have lived this long. I'm scared to go get seen about as I think it's better left unknown I already fight depression n manic bipolar I just can't take no more bad news and I don't think treatment would be any help any advice

Hi, my name is Griff7001. I'm here because
I would like people to understand what true manic episode feels like#MightyTogether #Anxiety #BipolarDisorder

Hello, I’m Adia.

My life has recently started falling apart again, so I’m hoping that I’ll be able to find some sort of support!

Im having serious familial and housing issues right now and I’m finding it difficult to cope. I’m living with my dad at the moment (who was an alcoholic and abusive, he’s cleaned up for now but he has Bipolar Disorder and he tends to relapse when he’s manic) and my younger siblings. My mom is basically homeless now.

Im supposed to be starting college soon, and I don’t know what to do. I want to be there to support my siblings and my family, but I also desperately want to get out. I feel like I’m not even my own person anymore.

In general I find it hard to hold down jobs, to keep friends. My life is collapsing and I feel pretty hopeless.

Any support would be wonderful. I just want to know it’s not too late for me.

#MajorDepressiveDisorder #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #ADHD #MentalHealth #MightyTogether