apraxia of speech

Lately the stress in my life has been messing with my language abilities, more than usual. Mostly expressive, but of course, since I have developmental receptive language difficulties as well, that's affected too. It's reminded me (over and over again) that the basic, underlying , fundamental difficulties that have been with me all my life really haven't changed, even though I've got oodles more compensatory skills than I used to. Many of which I've been losing to various degrees, for varying lengths of time.

I really don't have anyone in my life anymore who understands what it's like to struggle with language, to struggle with communication, to struggle even with the concepts that underlie these things. Much less the physical difficulties that present themselves periodically as well. (Movement disorder type things, which may or may not be partially diagnosed). #Apraxia #ApraxiaOfSpeech #VocalCordDysfunction #FocalDystonia #SensoryProcessingDisorder #SensoryIntegration

I feel like such an alien sometimes... having difficulty understanding concepts other people (even children) take for granted, yet easily understanding and being able to do things other people find difficult, easily.

#VocalCordDysfunction #Dystonia #Autism #Dysphagia #SensoryIntegration #SensoryProcessingDisorder #MotorDisorders #Dyspraxia #Apraxia #ApraxiaOfSpeech #Undiagnosed I posted a question on the vocal cord dysfunction and dystonia communities earlier tonight, and then did a little research on vocal cord dysfunction in order to see if I could find any answers to a question that has been unanswered or partially answered for decades in my life. About the cause of the painful vocal spasms I've had all my life, and the dysphagia issues that developed in early adulthood, that seemed to be related. An exacerbation, if you will. Both have waxed and waned significantly since.

What I found google suggested two things: 1. Nobody in the medical community really has a clue about vocal spasms, although the field of dystonia has more knowledge than the rest. And 2: Given all my other issues, it is entirely likely these symptoms are not caused by jyst one thing. It could be a number of things! Oh yeah, I forgot to add #Trauma #PTSD #CPTSD and #Asthma to the list of potential factors. Oh, and #childabusesurvivor .

Stress does seem to have played a factor, as does #Fatigue especially as I consider the baseline level of fatigue and stress I lived with for most if my life that I am only now beginning to realize the effects they must've had on me, and how much it all must've inhibited my abilities and ability to grow as a person, and to learn. (Which were hidden due to my high intelligence and academic ability. #Hyperlexia played a factor in that. And the general intolerance of the people in my environment, and the ableist nature of society in general.) And the cost its all had on/to me.

But there's a lot of neurological complexities too, as you can see by the hashtags. It makes me leery of trying yo officially get this sorted out after all. Most medical professionals won't know quite what to make of it all, if they even know the terms! Still, I wonder... I've always thought it was one thing, or mostly one thing, but maybe it isn't. Maybe it is more part of the whole "interesting neurological mess" thing so many autistics find themselves dealing with. (Multiple neurological syndromes that are too complicated to try to explain how they all work, never mind interact, to outsiders)