Just Wondering (OOB - 2020)
Would God tell me?
Will He just answer me one question?
Will that be all I get?
Will His answer satisfy me?
Will I finally understand the depth of His thought?
Will I agree or argue, or will I be made whole?
I have listened to the knowledge of men.
I have watched the wisdom of the living up close and from afar.
I have reasoned with the mighty and walked with the wise.
Still their wisdom is un-attaining and their knowledge unfulfilling.
I have listened to the rationalization out of a purported experience
I have struggled at the depth of the understanding of mortals
I am yet to be convinced and maybe never will.
My soul seeks a better plain.
I yearn for a day when my heart’s desire will be fulfilled.
For a day when He finally tells me why.
Why does He do what He does?
Why does He humble one and lift the other?
Why will He call one home and let the other be?
Why would He not allow the joy of the fruit of labor?
Why was He not on the left side, “where He doth work”?
Why do we suffer for no reason?
Why does He seem afar off when you need Him the most?
Why did He take the one you loved the most?
Why did life’s journey feel blurry?
Why does He allow the Weak to be swallowed by the Strong?
I could come up with answers, but I will not be satisfied.
I could imagine His ways, but it will be a waste of time.
I could try to reason my way out, but it will not do me any good.
I can search and learn the depths of Knowledge.
I may conquer the wells of Wisdom, but
Understanding His ways gives peace to the Soul when
God answers the whys of life’s journey.
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I am not good at posting on this site but I have been extremely overwhelmed lately. God has helped me keep the little faith I have left even if just hanging by a thread.