Inside The Mighty

I hope you all have been having a great new year, and are staying warm and safe. Honestly, I myself have been struggling and I wanted to share what I wrote about my current experiences living with bipolar disorder. I will share more about the other challenges I have been dealing with over the last year that have all combined to feed into my emotional & mental struggles in a future post.

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There is a roulette wheel in my head…

…and sometimes it just won't stop.
The ball keeps spinning, never settling in a slot
I look to my right and see black
To the left I see red yet I’m stuck on the track

I feel like a hamster spinning in his wheel
For hours into the night until I can't feel
My legs should have been tired hours ago
Yet I didn’t notice anything so lost in the flow

I'm trapped on a spinning merry-go-round
Going up and down to the cacophony of sound
My horse hugs the pole, and I can't feel my butt
It doesn't seem to matter as I am stuck in a rut

I'm on a race track speeding round and round
Hurtling at high speed, almost off the ground
As I'm going so fast totally out of control
No brakes, no down shift, just on a crazy roll

I'm in suburbia driving in circles on a roundabout
Yet I can't see the exits and make a turn out
Circling around, my steering wheel is stuck
I speed up, I get dizzy, this is just my luck

It seems in these cycles I’m always alone
I hide, avoid and ignore, never pick up the phone
It is a lonely place yet my history proceeds me
I'm so ashamed to be weak and desperately needy

Then there are the mountains to climb
I hike really fast I'm having a great time
I sprint to the top emboldened & inspired
With unlimited energy when I'm totally wired

Yet what goes up must come down
And I tumble and tumble smack to the ground
There is absolutely nothing left of that energy
Its suddenly pitch black dark  and I can't see

There are poker games near the roulette wheel
I'm a winner, it's destined, I’m a real big deal
Bid big on a pot the chips are all mine
Then I go all in and moments later I find

My hands are empty, I completely lost it all
My savings are gone as I took the fall
I slink out the door can't even afford a ride
Won't call a friend, and break through my pride

The hamster on the wheel has fallen to the ground
Can't get up although I ‘m desperate to be found
Once again on the ground I just can't move
Lost my momentum and fallen out of the groove

The park has way since closed and the merry-go-round is shuttered dark
Yet lying at the foot of my horse
I lay lost without a hint of my spark
I noticed the the paint is cracked & faded
It shows its age, is it all overrated?

My cars battery died in the middle of the track
Under the hood my wiring was way out of whack
Can't start up again as I’m just stuck in place
It looks like its destined I’ll never finish the race

I often wonder when will these cycles ever end
Will I ever find balance or just have to pretend
Like I have for decades… everything is just fine
While I’m shut down, lonely and lost in my mind

I need to embrace support available to me
Ditch the shame & pride so others can see
What's really going on as I struggle inside
It certainly has not helped me to run and hide

Can I accept support, admit when I'm so down
Or I’m high in the clouds lost to be found
I don't need sudden riches, today I ‘ll just survive
I've found the glory & blessing that I'm still alive!

Moshe Mark Adler
21st February 2025

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(the photo is mine - I have been exploring nature photography)

#MentalHealth #Depression #Anxiety #Bipolar2 #Bipolar1 #BipolarDepression #BipolarDisorder #ADHD #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #Addiction #AddictionRecovery #PTSD #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #SocialAnxiety #Disability #Grief #DistractMe #CheckInWithMe #ParkinsonsDisease #Headache #Migraine #IfYouFeelHopeless #Trauma #COVID19 #InsideTheMighty #MightyTogether

"Don't say you love me if your actions hurt me daily. If my pain doesn't affect you, it's clear there's no emotional connection between us.

I'm not asking for your help or support to fix my problems. But the least you can do is acknowledge my struggles. Simply being present and saying, 'I'm here for you,' means a lot.

No lectures, no advice, no promises to figure things out together. Just let me know you care. Say, 'I'm here, and I'll hold you when you need it.'

When you turn around, you'll always see me, maybe from afar, but I'll be there. That's what love means to me."

Soldier by Melanie R.

I am a chosen soldier
in the Army of The Lord.
Presence,
Spirit lifted,
Sovereign Word-
my trusted sword.

I put on Ephesians armor
Found ready,
as we stand.
Together He battles with us,
fight for good, and glory land.

The breastplate of righteousness
adorned across my chest,
protects and helps guide me.
My heart source brightly cleansed.

The helmet of salvation
Covers, and keeps watch.
Shielding darts,
casts down arrows-
diffuses negative thoughts!

Washed robes of white ;
mercy’s priestly gown.
Anointed Oil…
Lamb Sheared-
no sound.

Unblemished armor,
Clothed in grace.
Mercy’s knight
holds shield of faith!

Covered by King’s glory.
Truth’s belt buckled in,
Following His Story
Shoes of readiness tread again!

Yielded body
Willing forge,
Faithful soldier-
Unsheathed sword.

Marching onward
torrential lands
crushing giants,
heads in hand!

We’re designed to knock down strongholds,
Conquer fear,
destroy doubt.
Lord, anoint us as we travel,
steadfast martyrs for the crown.

Thank you Lord for equipping us with the tools to endure!
Stay Strong Mighty Warriors!

Ephesians 613
Therefore, take up the whole armor of God.
That you may be able to stand in the day of evil, and having done all you can, stand firm.

2 Corinthians 10 3-4
For though we walk in the flesh we do not war according to the flesh. For our weapons of warfare are not carnal, but mighty in God for pulling down strongholds.

Isaiah 53:7
He was oppressed and afflicted, yet he did not open his mouth; he was led like a lamb to the slaughter, and as a sheep before its shearers is silent, so he did not open his mouth.

1 Peter 1:18-19
You know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.

1 Corinthians 5:7
Christ, our Passover lamb, has been sacrificed.

#ChronicIllness #ChronicInflammatoryDemyelinatingPolyneuropathy #MitochondrialDisease #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #IrritableBowelSyndromeIBS #PrimaryImmunodeficiency #InsideTheMighty #MightyPoets #MightyTogether #CheckInWithMe

Crimson by Melanie R.

Crimson red-
against the snow.
My heartache bleeds,
and nearly froze!

I turn to you
and say a prayer,
release me Lord,
from pain
and spare…
my heart from this deep suffering…

the ache,
the hurt…,
my mind
wandering.

Crimson red,
down and blue.
White of snow,
thoughts of you.

Buffalo blizzard…
A frozen cry;
of time felt lost,
and days gone by.

I reach for you;
long to hold you….
Still feel your love around.
It wasn’t just the ordinary,
pure love is what we found.

Although time goes;
will never fade.
Swirls like wind,
still falls like rain.

Our hearts hold onto memories.
Days up,
then down,
like swaying trees.

Crimson red,
Hearts of truth.
Cold of snow,
Thoughts of you.

Red cardinal singing
love’s song of faith.
Holy Water springing,
by pearl o’heaven’s gate
.
A timely whispered love song,
her music sung deep blue.
Sets free-
releases sadness,
as spirit’s called to you.

Consecrated,
Soul guided.
As He too heard our cries,
He knows of all the suffering,
every groaning,
every sigh.

Crimson red
the blood was poured;
robes washed white-
Calvary brought forth!

So shout. Hallelujah!”
and say, AMEN!
to Our Sovereign Lord,
and most earnest friend!

Heart crimson red;
Lord’s Promises True.
He carried The Cross…
and message for you!

John 16:22
Now is your time of grief, but I will see you again. And you will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away.

Romans 8:26
In the same way, The Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but The Spirit Himself intercedes for us through wordless groans.

Psalm 145:18
The Lord is near to all who call Him.
To all who call on Him in truth.

Mark 9:3
His clothes became dazzling white, whiter than anyone in the world could bleach them.

Revelation 7:14
These are they that have come out of great tribulation, they have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the lamb.

#MitochondrialDisease #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #RareDisease #ChronicIllness #ChronicInflammatoryDemyelinatingPolyneuropathy #ChronicPain #InsideTheMighty #PrimaryImmunodeficiency #MightyPoets #CheckInWithMe

Peaked by Melanie R.

I looked to the hills where great mountains stand.
For all of my help is from God’s righteous hand.
They reach to the heavens as they do declare,
the signs of His wonder,
His glory, and care.

The height of His Majest-
My Rock,
cornerstone.
Atop there with Him,
I’m sheltered…
I’m home.

The Rock that was thrown down;
rejected,
then rolled…
now holds me together,
shows mysteries unknown.

Mt. Tabor’s prominence,
Mt. Carmel stood tall,
proving there’s One God
that reigns over all.

In His holy mountain,
with Him by my side,
in hearing His word
growing faith-
I abide.

The gush of the water that came from the stone,
Rained living water;
restoring me whole.

Psalm 121:1-2
I lift my eyes to the hills. From where does my help comes from? My help comes from The Lord who made heaven and earth.

1 Corinthians 10:4
All drank the same spiritual drink. For they drank from the spiritual rock that followed them, and the rock was Christ.

Isaiah 41:10
…I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

Stay strong Mighty Warriors!
God bless and be with you all on your health journey!

If you enjoy my poems and inspiration please be sure to check out my YouTube channel:
Melanie’s Melody for more of God’s message in suffering.

#ChronicIllness #RareDisease #MitochondrialDisease #ChronicInflammatoryDemyelinatingPolyneuropathy #PosturalOrthostaticTachycardiaSyndrome #ChronicPain #RheumatoidArthritis #HypothyroidismUnderactiveThyroidDisease #InsideTheMighty #MightyPoets #MightyTogether #CheckInWithMe

The Earnest life of Rick by Melanie R.

A trumpet for The Lord
exhortations of joy.
His laboring to completion,
now stands with God‘s employ.

His soul searched while on earth,
walked through the desert land.
Each step sinking deeper…
…deeper in quick sand.
His life had twists and turns.
Struggling on his course.
No one would have expected
Rick working for The Lord.

He may have made decisions
only God could understand,
but it was there in this duress
Rick took His Mighty Hand.

He called out for the savior,
His trumpet rang out true
He changed the errors of his ways-
His spirit made anew.

Life’s work he was a builder,
painter,
skilled by trade,
But also worked in spirit,
God’s foundation that was laid.

Rick wasn’t on this earth long,
and his passing seems too soon,
We wish we had more time,
to say we were proud of you!
But I believe he knows,
as he is flying free,
and joined our other loved ones
who embraced eternity.

For in God’s righteous kingdom
the faithful will unite
the ones that were chosen,
to take this eagle’s flight.

Rick’s legacy lives on
through all he loved so dear;
and cycles through the memories
and the love through all the years.

In Abraham’s bosom,
in Jesus’ loving arms;
in perfect peace,
Rick passed his test,
didn’t need to see the scars.

But we all will miss him dearly
as God placed his soul at rest.
for it was by Rick’s life
that we were truly blessed.

#Grief #InsideTheMighty #MightyPoets

Bells by Melanie R.

Bells vibrate in their tolling;
the toll upon its frame.
Spirit sings,
the tone not muffled
by harsh suffering.

It swung to hit,
and deaden sound;
to take away its song.
Clapper’s ding-
piercing pitch,
would strike the headstock strong.

Though hung up in a belfry,
and yanked on by a rope.
The one that had no slack to give,
the one that had no hope.

The pulling down,
forced side to side…
Jolted,
worn down bell.

It didn’t crack,
stayed in rhythm-
swayed til it was still.

The bell’s yoke
heavy laden,
reverberate on rounds.
Called out to my savior,
He heard,
my spirit found!
Prepared 10,000 angels,
Golden bells of faithful noise,
the blowing of the shofar,
a shout of grateful poise.

Lord’s musical procession;
Instruments in hand.
Conducts His Holy orchestra…
Bell’s song will ring again.