Autoimmune Immunodeficiency

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    Does chemo trigger your anxiety and/or depression?

    I’m wondering if anyone else has noticed that a few days after chemo, anxiety is heightened and depression sets in heavy?

    I’ve noticed it the last few times along with the extreme fatigue and generally awful chemotherapy side effects. It’s a little hard to tell if the side effects and especially the fatigue are triggering my major depression and anxiety or if they’re being made worse by them or if it’s just another side effect of the actual chemotherapy drugs?

    I feel like it’s worse than just the physical side effects, it stops me from being able to have any kind of enjoyment or sense of purpose or will to keep going period. Plus the physical symptoms of anxiety and depression just add to the physical symptoms I’m already having from the cancer and the chemo. I typically feel good the 1-2 days after chemo and then day 3 I feel crappy with side effects and a sneakily quiet depression and then days 4-6 the physical side effects, the anxiety and the depression are overpowering and take me over completely. I’m not me, I’m lethargic, angry, mean, I snap, I’m disoriented and disconnected from myself and everyone else. I can’t create anything, no art, no crafts, no coloring, no self care, no physical personal care… just laying on the couch staring at my phone or the tv hating the world.

    Because of my heart I was taken off my psych meds in August and because I have Medicaid I only see a therapist via zoom once every other month. Which of course helps nothing. My primary care NP is the only one who can refer me to their clinic psychiatrist who prescribes and changes meds, however my PC NP is on maternity leave and that clinic has nobody covering for her patients. The joys of Medicaid in America where good medical care is only for the rich.

    #Cancer #BileDuctCancer #Chemotherapy #MajorDepressiveDisorder #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #Anxiety #Fibromyalgia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #metastaticcancer

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    Let us never overlook the importance of this & every future Memorial Day

    Friends & Sufferers, let us never overlook or understate the importance of this special day. While it’s easy to be consumed by the hustle & bustle of daily life, may we all find the strength to consider the incredible sacrifice made by those who fought to defend our peoples’ right to individual & collective freedom.
    -
    #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #CheckInWithMe

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    COVID19 vaccine and autoimmune disease

    Hey everyone. I was just wondering if any of you autoimmune disease/rheumatoid arthritis people have gotten the vaccine yet and how it went? I'm seeing my rheummy soon and wanted to know how other people reacted to it before I get the doctors opinion. Thanks everyone #RheumatoidArthritis #ChronicMigraines #ChronicIllness #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #MentalHealth

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    Nervous 😟

    Just venting my anxiety. I’ve been in the hospital for almost a week. I was forced to come in to the ER when I woke with a 102 fever and palpitations much more severe than my usual POTS flutters. I was diagnosed with #Sepsis and #SIRS - scary. It took a while for the cultures to come back, but they finally narrowed the infection down to my #Port . Tomorrow I have to go down and have the port removed and have a #PiccLine placed so I can continue getting my #TPN . I’m not usually a nervous person, but I am so anxious about the removal. Could be some #PTSD related to IR and my j-tube days or just fear of the unknown (pain, sedation, etc.). Local anesthesia is not always effective for me so that’s one thing on my mind, plus I don’t like not having all the details ahead of time. 😟
    I’m sure I’ll be fine once it’s said and done but this on top of not feeling well has me 🤢
    #Disability #Hospital #AutonomicDysfunction #Gastroparesis #TotalParenteralNutrition #Malabsorption #FanconiSyndrome #MetabolicCondition #MultipleSclerosis #Hypoglycemia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #SmallFiberNeuropathy #OrthostaticHypotension #Anxiety #interventionalradiology #AutonomicNeuropathy #PowerPort #Portacath

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    © The Will To Live (Memoir) 2020 Ending

    This is my first shot at it, and I am excited. If I can help just one person I will feel like I have accomplished something, but if I have tons of people reach out to me I maybe one little busy bee but I will feel so good inside for doing what I am doing for free and do not want any recognition for it. I could use the money trust m e, but that is not what this is about. I know many people cannot afford to get professional medical help. I want to make clear I am not trying to be a counselor or doctor. I am just one person that has been through many trials in my life and if I can help somebody by talking to them or answering questions you may have about my story or your life please contact me. You are why I have done this. I did not do this for myself. It was hard on me, but I wanted to take it on as a challenge to try and do good in my life. Even though it brought all of it back for me, it made me realize things that I never have before and has answered questions for myself. Due to this I have benefited even if it was hard for me. I want to be the person that is there for somebody they may not have anybody else to turn to. No matter how hard it was for me bringing back these memories it will be worth it in the end if I can have a positive influence on you in a time of need. God Bless and I pray for healing of all in need. Remember, you are somebody in this crazy world. Keep your head held high!


    By: © A Small - Town Somebody 2020

    #Lupus #AntiphospholipidSyndrome #Fibromyalgia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #Depression #Abuse #MentalHealth #MentalHealthHero #LupusDiagnosis #CheckInWithMe

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    © The Will To Live (Memoir) 2020 Conclusion Continued

    I guess in a way, I can say Thank You Mom and Dad for the way you treated me because it gave me what I needed to be a survivor in the end. And that is not being sarcastic I really mean that, I am grateful that it you did not take me down with you. If you do not have that certain thing that helps motivate you try to determine what that is and do it every day. If you are wondering why I came up with the name A Small Town Somebody it is because I am from a small town in Kentucky. Many people look down on their self and always feel like they are a nobody in this enormous world we all live in when they go through hard times. Well, I am here to tell you that you are somebody whether you feel that you are or not. So, I remind myself that I am somebody in this ever - changing world I live in no matter what anybody tells me. If anybody has questions, PLEASE DO NOT hesitate to contact me. No question is a stupid question. Please never feel ASHAMED to contact anybody. It takes a strong person to say I need a little help when you usually would not seek emotional help. Never think you are too tough to ask questions or feel embarrassed because it makes you feel like a weak person. I can guarantee you if you have any mixed emotions I have been where you are sometime or another and maybe in a different way. Improving your knowledge will just help you be able to get you through your hardest times and maybe help others if this is what you want to do. I might even learn something from you that can help me because I know I do not know everything; I am far from knowing it all. I have always been a kind - hearted person that has always wanted to help people, but never knew how I could do that. I have never felt that I had a specific calling in life. I have a job that I like, but I do not feel like it is my calling. After all what I have been through medically the good Lord must have me here for a reason (I should be dead) so if this is my calling, I feel blessed to have finally found it and get to work. 

    To be cont...please visit my page for the previous thoughts leading up to this ( I am working on posting my full Memoir on my page if you are interested) #Lupus #AntiphospholipidSyndrome #Fibromyalgia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #ChronicPain #ChronicIllness #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #Depression #CheckInWithMe #Abuse #MentalHealth #MentalHealthHero #LupusDiagnosis

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    © The Will To Live (Memoir) 2020 Conclusion Continued

                 I hope this helps somebody. You always think your situation is so crazy there is no way anybody can be dealing with anything like this, but now at my age I see how it has affected and changed me in ways I wouldn’t realize without my husband telling me. I have to say for me I was lucky because it made me a better person, when in most cases it could have destroyed somebody’s life and not because they are weak. I just handled it well, but I know the way I was before I got pregnant and it really helped me. Due to the environment I lived in I had a bad attitude just toward my parents. I did not let anybody mess with me. I would stand up for myself and my mother when I got older. I know you do not know my name, but I would love to hear from other people who may have questions or feel like they need help. I have been through a lot in my 34 years and if I can help anybody, I would feel like I have succeeded in what I have set out to do. Please do not ever think your story is to crazy or feel it is stupid and too embarrassed to tell somebody, trust me it is not. I would like to know somebody that may have had similar experiences as I have throughout their life.  I am going to figure how to get a blog or website going that does not have my name on it but I will officially be known as A Small Town Somebody, because like I said I would love to hear from people on issues or even on what they think about my Anonymous Memoir, that is probably at a 4th grade reading level. LOL! Well the way my ten year - old reads it may be considered a 1st grade reading level, but that is not what is important though and we know that. It gets my story and point across the exact way I remember it and I wanted to be as truthful as possible. Just to let you know I am a funny person at times and love to laugh. How could I possibly have a sense of humor after all this? And again, the answer is I do not know, but I like to be funny and read funny things. I am goofy sometimes and have been funny my whole life.  It does make us all feel better to laugh. Have you heard laughter is the best medicine?  I am sure you have; humor keeps people going sometimes. Everybody is different though; we all have something that helps keep us going. I would love to know from others what helps keep you going through hard times? I can tell you it was not laughter for me that helped me pull through. The depth of how bad I was treated gave me all the motivation I needed to pull through and prove myself. 


    To be cont.... please visit my page for the previous thoughts leading up to this ( I am working on posting my full Memoir on my page if you are interested) #Lupus #AntiphospholipidSyndrome #Fibromyalgia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #Depression #CheckInWithMe #Abuse #MentalHealth #MentalHealthHero #LupusDiagnosis

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    © The Will To Live (Memoir) 2020 Conclusion Continued

            Please never decide to end your life over pain somebody else has caused you. They will pay in the long run. Their life may look perfect to you now but trust me it will catch up to them one day. I do not care if they are rich or poor, they will have to answer one way or another. Show them how great of a person you are. Suicide is never the answer to anything you are going through. You are too important for that.  Do NOT let them win.  You may feel like you do not matter in this world, but you do. There is somebody out there that cares for you. It may not be family, but sometimes the best people in our lives are not family.  If you feel you don’t matter in this world because maybe you feel you haven’t done anything important with your life, it is never too late to make something of yourself, if that is the reason you feel suicidal. I did not go to college and get my four - year degree until I was 26 and graduated at 31. Yes, I felt like I would never get done, but it went by so quick. I do not care if you are 60 years old it is never too late to do something for yourself if you feel like a failure because of that, you are not a failure. Remember being rich, having the biggest house, or any materialistic items for that matter does not make you any better than anybody else. In this life everybody acts like it does, it is much better to be a humble, faithful person, than to be someone who owns items that will perish in this world when you leave.  You are better off to be poor and give somebody the shirt off your back than to be rich and greedy. When you pass in this life you cannot take anything with you, just your soul and that is all that counts. I am asking you to please care about yourself and realize that you do matter. If there is something you are going through specific that is making you feel suicidal please reach out to somebody. I would be more than happy to talk to you, and I would do my best to help you. There are always phone numbers you can call, and I have them listed. I believe this world has moved so far away from what really matters and we feel like we need to be up there with everybody else, whether that be money, job, vehicle, anything of this world that in all reality does not define you, even though you feel like it does. Please keep that in mind. I hope that helps you. I have many Hotline Phone Numbers at the end of my story. Please use them if you need to.

    To be cont.... please visit my page for the previous thoughts leading up to this ( I am working on posting my full Memoir on my page if you are interested) #Lupus #AntiphospholipidSyndrome #Fibromyalgia #AutoimmuneImmunodeficiency #ChronicIllness #ChronicPain #Anxiety #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #Depression #CheckInWithMe #Abuse #MentalHealth #MentalHealthHero #LupusDiagnosis