Marriage

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    How ADHD Husbands Expect/Prefer to Be Treated by Their Neurotypical (Normal) Wives

    He would like for you to have a mild tone when starting conversations, prefer you give a request rather than demand, and accept that ADHD spouse has a right to his opinion, whether or not you like them.

    Don't set up a dynamic in which your spouse feels he can never do well enough for you. Even though you may feel like he makes some childish decisions, still give him some responsibilities ones you feel he can handle and when he advances, then congratulate him and give him more responsibilities, after a few years you will view him as the potential man you married. Then your respect levels for him will go up. #ADHD #adhdwomen #adhdmen #Marriage #Respect

    Question

    I saw a post today…. What was a “marriage” win this week? Did something g go really well for you and your partner this week? How did it make you feel?

    For me 2 weeks after a huge blowout… we r at least talking… small talk, nothing g real important, but talking at least! It makes me “scared” “happy” “cautious” “worried” but mostly “glad”! How about any of you? Hoping yours is more along the lines of “planning a trip together” “went out for a nice dinner” “cuddle on the couch” ….. tell me some good happy stories!! #marriageishard #Communication #ChronicIllness #Marriage

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    #Psychiatrist #dreams #MajorDepressiveDisorder #PTSD #AnxietyAttack #SleepDisorders #MentalHealth #Marriage

    Hi all! Hope everyone is well and safe 🙂 And taking good care of themselves.

    I really dont know who I can talk too except you all awesome people over here.

    I seen my doctor last week. He missed out a medication when I over to see him. When its the night, at around 8+pm, I was about to take my night medication and retire for the night, I found out one of the medication was missing and thats was my sleeping aid.

    There is no way I could get to him, expect writing to him. I thought he wanted to stop me for that medication as I am starting work next Monday.

    So, I just wrote to him and I went to have my shower.

    He wrote to me and called me from his clinic.

    He send the medication down personally to my home. He asked me whether my husband will throw a tantrum or get upsets if he does so. I said no ( this is as I have shared alot of my issues between me and husband with him. My age gap with my husband is 17 years. I am his 2nd wife)

    He bumped into my husband at the carpark. As he asked which block is mine located at. My husband then asked him is he my doctor. My husband said is okay, he can take it from there and he will bring the medication up to me.

    But my doctor insisted on walking my husband up to my unit and passed it personally to me.

    To be honest, I’m really touched by his gesture as it was coming to midnight then.

    I dont like and have the habit of troubling people when I can pick it up tomorrow from the clinic as I will be near.

    I told the doctor that I can picked it up tomorrow from the clinic. He said its alright and its not right for me to pick it up as its his fault.

    I have this dream of going through a very long and dimmed tunnel, with just a torch in hand. I had to crawl, for what I remember for around 10-15 minutes to the end. The one receiveing me at the end is a new doctor at his practise ( which is a female doctor ) she then helped me out from the tunnel and handed me to my doctor.

    My doctor then asked me can i hold your hand? I said yes of course. And we started chatting while we are spinning? ( sounds dramatic) and it ended up with me hugging him with a arm at his waist. He kept talking about all my problems which I am facing and he said he will take good care of me. While at the other end, his nurses all are staring at me with envy.

    I have issues with my husband, we are not intimate for around a year. He has problems lasting or rather getting it up. It really turns me off. I told him to seek professional help. He scolds me and said it is a shame to speak to a doctor and seeking help for that issue. I no longer feel close to him. I no longer hold or hug him. He disgusts me. I no longer wear my wedding ring on my finger- the reason i gave him, my fingers are bloated. I know i am not attracted as compared to me in my 20s. But at least i make an effort to dress and look good when i go out. He doesnt.

    I dont bring him and hang out with my friends. As most of my friends spouses are around my age range. My husband temper is getting from bad to worst and i dont know why.

    Only a few of my best friends have met him. As for the rest of my friends. They know that I am married, as for who is is my husband, still remains a mystery.

    Thank you for hearing me out ❤️ stay safe!

    #Psychiatrist #PTSD #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #SleepDisorders

    Post

    UGH!! #ChronicIlless #Marriage #motherinlaws #thisshitshard #tired

    Hi there all my people!! It s been a while since I’ve posted. For some reason I couldn’t get The ap to download! So how s everyone doing? I’m hopi g you all are having a better time of things and you’re all looking forward to fall! The colors the crisp air the fact we can wear our favorite sweaters! So for me…. Tomorrow is my first visit with a new Endochronologist…. Haven’t had one in a while (other dr s of mine have been dealing with the adrenal issues) so I’m a little worked up a little nervous but hey!! I’m a big girl ! I got this!! I do t know about you all but I’ve not “asked” husband to go with me to any dr s appts in forever….. he s too busy with work, his mother etc . How many of you get the feeling if they (your spouse or significant others) go with you to dr s appts they “use” the info against you at a later date? I’m not sure if I’m justified in feeling that way but I do sometimes….. I take very good notes while I’m at the dr s (which I suggest you all do!) so I just look back on those notes if I’ve forgotten something. So anyways…. Just wanted to say Sorry for not being on here lately….. and say HELLO!! I hope the rest of your Sunday is as perfect as it gets and that you all are feeling good today!! Hugs to all of you! And Thank you for being here for me to rant to, vent to, bounce things off of and just simply for being kind humans!!!

    Post

    Is it Dissociation? #MentalHealth #DissociationDisorders #ChronicDepression #Anxiety #Marriage #ToxicMarriage

    My partner and I have been married for nearly two years. Have been together for longer than that. Any time I try to “fix” what I think is wrong, I always end up the bad guy. We had someone sit in for our family meeting to see if there were any things that needed mediation in case our communication was off or toxic. Turns out, I don’t understand a thing my partner is saying to me and I make the conversation go in circles. By the third explanation through, my brain shuts off but I still contribute to the conversation. I will only cry and “shut down” when certain words or situations are brought up that I don’t understand. Is this dissociation? Or Do I just not understand what is being asked of me? Normal and reasonable are words used quite often to describe the things needed of me, but I don’t understand the definitions of those in terms of relationships. I am told that I am adult who needs to come to my own conclusions and that I shouldn’t have to be coddled like a child. I don’t think I need to be, but I do need clarification. But once we get there, it’s like my words are no longer my own and I have ZERO control of what I say or do. It’s like I’m on Autopilot and watching myself through my own eyes. I have no choice in what comes out of my mouth or my actions after a certain point. I’m in therapy but I don’t know if this is something I need help with or if I’m just in the wrong and need to grow up. I’m nearly 28 years old.

    Post

    I’m new here

    I came for support. I am trying so hard in my marriage but I feel like I am always failing. I have anxiety, depression, possibly on the spectrum, possibly BPD. Things really blew up during Covid and now I can’t get it right again. I am on meds and I love my therapist, but it seem no matter how hard I try, think things through. and learn, I am always wrong. I want to fix my relationship, and am not internet in leaving or separating. I just need support on the days that are particularly hard. #overwhelmed #Marriage #Anxiety #hopeless

    Post

    It's coming!

    thepancakeking.substack.com/p/its-coming

    #Autism #Marriage