motivationneeded

I’ve just started a short term leave from work for a depressive episode that started around August. It’s been slowly getting worse until, about a week before Christmas my whole body was vibrating and I would jump three feet in the air if someone sneezed too loud because I was so hypersensitive. There was no way I could continue working so my boss and I agreed that I would take an extended leave over the holidays.

I’ve lived with undiagnosed high sensitivity/depression for most of my life, but was always very high functioning so people just said I was “high strung.” I learned not to listen to the warning signs and just kept pushing through. I am now 40 years old and I’m the middle of an episode of whatever mental health cocktail I have and I cannot think my way out of a paper bag, and I don’t know how to spend my days.

I feel like there is something I should be doing to make myself feel better but the days just kind of slip by...and I may have done one or two things around the house but I barely remember. In my mind I have ideas for things I’d like to be doing but my current reality is that it’s hard to remember to brush my teeth. I’m worried a month will roll around and I will still be staring at the ceiling unable to move, imagining the things I could do if I had the energy.

Does anyone have experience with taking leave for a depressive episode? What are some healthy ways to pass the time when you find it tiring to walk from your bed to the couch?

#Depression #PersistentDepressiveDisorder #HighlysensitivePerson #boredom #MedicalLeave #motivationneeded #CheckInWithMe