I feel like this year has been a massive fail on my side and that I've got no achievements over the past 12 months. I've been stuck in the house more days than I can count this year and majority of the time I've been at my desk thinking about all the things I could be doing but being unable to actually do it. I need a more positive outlook on this year but I feel like it's too late. I hope next year is better and I can go out more because the loneliness is eating me alive!!
I’ve just started a short term leave from work for a depressive episode that started around August. It’s been slowly getting worse until, about a week before Christmas my whole body was vibrating and I would jump three feet in the air if someone sneezed too loud because I was so hypersensitive. There was no way I could continue working so my boss and I agreed that I would take an extended leave over the holidays.
I’ve lived with undiagnosed high sensitivity/depression for most of my life, but was always very high functioning so people just said I was “high strung.” I learned not to listen to the warning signs and just kept pushing through. I am now 40 years old and I’m the middle of an episode of whatever mental health cocktail I have and I cannot think my way out of a paper bag, and I don’t know how to spend my days.
I feel like there is something I should be doing to make myself feel better but the days just kind of slip by...and I may have done one or two things around the house but I barely remember. In my mind I have ideas for things I’d like to be doing but my current reality is that it’s hard to remember to brush my teeth. I’m worried a month will roll around and I will still be staring at the ceiling unable to move, imagining the things I could do if I had the energy.
Does anyone have experience with taking leave for a depressive episode? What are some healthy ways to pass the time when you find it tiring to walk from your bed to the couch?
I work full time and I'm a full time student or at least that's what I'm supposed to be right now. Lol I'm having more good days lately but I still have a whole lot of days where I can't pull myself out of bed and cancel the whole day.