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I did it. I took a shower…

I’d of never ever thought I’d be where I’m at today. Where showering is such a victory.

7 months ago I was the woman who held a full time job, paid my bills and raised two children on my own and we lived in a home that I worked very hard to buy. Life is what we make it right?? So I made sure to make it the best I possibly could and I was happy. I remember waking up eager to start a new day each morning. I remember the feeling of satisfaction and love each night as I tucked my kids into bed. My life wasn’t perfect but we were very blessed. Sure there were bumps in the road but I overcame every obstacle that came my way. As a teenager I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression and unfortunately they reared their ugly heads from time to time when things got tough, but I knew the protocol and how to care for myself during those times. I’d rest and give myself extra self love and care and things would return to normal.

Then in August my life flipped completely upside down as I slowly begin to enter my first “depressive episode”. Fast forward 7 months to today and I’m STILL here… engulfed in the darkness. My coping mechanisms no longer work and I can’t just jump back to normal like in the past. However, today I managed a shower. I hadn’t had one in over a week and I stayed in there for an hour trying to scrub the depression away. I can only wish it worked that way… but I’m proud of myself. I did it. I tried all week but today I made it happen. It’s the small victories that lead to bigger ones. I took a shower and I’m exhausted.

#Showering #Selfcare #Selflove #hygeine #progress #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Anxiety #CPTSD #TheMighty


What aspect of grooming is hard for you? #Showering

Showering wears me out, takes ALL my zip away. Must do at night. Wash my hair in the sink, cause I don’t want to go to bed with a wet head. My husband never turns off the a/c brrrisk


Anyone else hate how much effort it takes to have a bath/shower?

Ever since I started my first period at 11 years old I have been very very conscious of my personal hygiene. I use two types of deodorant and sometimes perfume too! Before I “got sick” I would have a bath or shower every other day. I would have had one every single day but I had to share the bathroom with five people and there wasn’t a lot of hot water.

These days, the thought of having a bath makes me want to cry. It exhausts me. I manage as best as I can with wipes and deodorants but I feel so filthy... I’ve been meaning to have a bath for the last two weeks but I just haven’t been able to do it.

Today, I forced myself to get in that damn tub and scrub myself clean... But I fainted whilst rinsing my hair and went underwater. This isn’t the first time it’s happened. I’m okay. I wasn’t under for long. But now my entire body feels like it’s been hit by a bus.

Our shower doesn’t work and I wouldn’t be able to stand up long enough to shower anyway.

I feel disgusting. I hate it. What do you guys do?

#POTS #EDS #BPD #NAFLD #InterstitialCystitis #Syncope #Showering #SpoonTheory #HelpMePlease