bipolar diorder

I am a 53 year old wife and mother of 2 (boy, 21 and girl, 18). I was diagnosed with Bipolar Type 2 in 1995 and ADD in 2001. My husband was diagnosed with Clinical Depression in 2007. My son was diagnosed with ADHD in 2008, Anxiety Disorder/Clinical Depression in 2010, and Bipolar Type 2 in 2014. My daughter was diagnosed with Depression/Anxiety and PTSD in 2017. We each have our own meds, therapist, and medication manager (currently, our med managers are all in the same practice, which makes appointments, etc a lot easier).
Being in a family with multiple MDs has its perks. If one of us runs out of a prescription, we can borrow from another with the same medication until we get ours. We carpool to appointments. If one of us feels sick, someone else immediately asks, "Did you take your meds?"
It (obviously) also has it's pitfalls. You never know when you walk in a room what (and how many) moods you'll encounter. Juggling appointments, especially before the kids could drive, took planning. Dishes and laundry were dependent on at least one person being "up." The worst is the "contagious" factor: one person's prolonged depression pulling the rest of us down.
My family is pretty open about our diagnoses; we're blessed to have a circle of friends who accept us the way we are. I'd like to hope our frankness about mood disorders makes others feel less afraid of their own mental state (because we all know people who suffer silently). We've each had friends come to us with questions regarding depression, anxiety etc. The friends of my kids frequently come to us before talking to their parents because they know we'll understand (more than once, I have approached a mother to navigate that opening conversation).
WOW! Thanks for reading- I didn't realize I had so much to say! #Depression #BipolarDiorder #PTSD #Anxiety #ADHD #Bipolar2Disorder #SeasonalAffectiveDisorder #dysfunctional
#Family

This was some years ago….Someone told me once that he admired my baking and envied me but wouldn’t tell me why he envied me…., then destroyed my just baked goods and tossed it away during a Very scary argument where he grabbed a knife to hurt himself then waved it at me angry and yelling and I ran away in panic. His explanation was that he needed All my undivided attention and I was not giving it to him at the time. After years, short therapy had passed, he says that he can very well destroy something that he admires and I cannot wrap my head around that. Then, there was no admiration only the illusion of it? Am I wrong or can you deliberately destroy things you admire!?

I have a million things to do! Change the cat box nobody’s favorite but mine is so easy. It’s an automatic and if I wouldn’t let it go so long it’d be a snap but I do. My daughters been on vacation for a week, and I had all these big plans to have stuff done we’re having a Peloton bike delivered tomorrow so I have to have boxes moved out of the way we’ll most are gone. She comes in tonight and I haven’t accomplished anything #BipolarDiorder #ADHD since #manicdepressivedisorder can you tell I kinda switch from topic to topic I’m sorry I’m hard to follow anyway I did bring the new litter thing in from the car so that’s half the battle. Right! I continually think of what I need to want to do and I even set time of when I’m going to start doing them but I always revise the times and stuff never gets done. I never get off the couch.

On the fence about filing for disability for #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder and #BipolarDiorder . I also have agoraphobia anxiety as well panic attacks. I know it will entail other doctors appointments which I hate at the moment due to Covid and the whole mask situation. I cannot wear one. Most my doctors do telehealth as well know my situation and so normally I make appointments to where I’m normally the last one as to not out anyone out. I’m wondering if this will actually help and not make things worse. Don’t want to set my self up for failure As well as causing triggers and more episodes

So last Friday or Saturday I got a letter from a bankruptcy attorney saying I was being sued and he could help me. I looked up on that local court records and yeah I'm being sied.

About 2 years ago I was doing real well after I paid off my house and I got a loan to get a new roof and windows. I was doing real well till I had a bad depression and was in the hospital got out and went manic and blew up my credit.

I went and seen a bankruptcy attorney about it and he told me I'd be okay that I could most likely keep my house and It would cost me $800 to start and then $200 the next month and $200 the next month.

Well my doctor submitted a paper to social security for me to get a payee but social security couldn't find a payee because of technicalities between federal and Illinois law. In Illinois the local mental health agencies also do payees for people. According to Medicare laws your provider cannot be your payee because it's a conflict of interest. If I was just getting SSI and Medicaid they could be my payee No problem but I'm getting Medicare assault they couldn't do it. I didn't have anybody else that could do it. So basically they just let me be.

Since then I've dug myself another hole I'm about $3000 in debt now. how about that doesn't matter because the bank and the store that are suing me are from 2 years ago.

The suit doesn't even have a hearing till March So I have time to save money. I got $300 for it tomorrow. Then next month because I won't have any loans to pay since I'm going to file bankruptcy anyway. I can have another four or five hundred.

If the bankruptcy lawyer still gives me the discount because I was getting social security then the $800 will start it off going fine. If not I'll have to save up some more money but I have plenty of time.

There's a small chance I could lose my house but it's very small. According to Illinois law they can't take your house if it's less than $15,000 and mine's only worth $10,000

There's a small chance I could be cleared incompetent of handling my own money and I would have a state guardian. Although there's a small chance of that even if I just get sued whether I file bankruptcy or not. That's freaky.

It's still just weighing me down now. I can't stop thinking about it. It's the worst anxiety I've had in 10 years. After thinking about it all day I get tired and sleep for 18 to 24 hours and then I wake up think about it again and do the same thing again.

I've been talking on here that helps keep my mind off of it but it's still just gets to me every time I stop.

#Anxiety #BipolarDiorder #bankruptcy