Bodyshame

Hello! So in the past months I've been gaining weight. I hadn't really realized that since I don't have any full body mirrors at home hahaha but a few weeks ago I tried to put on some jeans and didn't fit me anymore. It made me feel so sad and ugly, so I've been trying to work out on a regular basis but I just can't find the energy to do so.

Do you work out regularly? Can you give some advice on how to achieve it? Thanks for reading me

#ADHD #Workout #Bodyshame #Motivation

I was a small girl that came from a broken family. I was great in hiding this fact, until I became 13 years old.
I had a very skinny body, then I gained about 25 kg in one year because of PCOS. This huge hormonal change left me with many strech marks, dark spots and body shame. I am not sick anymore but deep inside I think I am ugly. I hate to touch my marks. I hate my body fats. Even after losing weight I still feel that I am in a bad shape. I can't accept what happened. I have not heal from this yet.
#Scars
#strechmarks
#Bodyshame
#PolycysticOvarySyndrome

Trigger warning : Self mutalation and weight issues

Does anyone ever feel like they can’t change how they feel about their body?
I feel like I hate my body .
I feel like I can’t change how I feel about it
I feel like it’s ugly and scar covered and stretch mark filled from gaining weight .
I feel like I could just take a pair of scissors and cut off all the fat on my body... on my arms and on my stomach.
I try not to overeat as much but I’m finding when I’m away from work and home to myself with the tv and the idea of snacking so much.
I find the urge when i run out of snacks to not rush to the store to get some chips or something. I don’t eat it all at once but I do enjoy to snack and eat a little bit of them here and there .
I know this probably sounds really messed up but for some reason I just feel like I need to change . I struggle with the idea of exercising and working out to help me lose the weight.

#BodyImageproblems #Bodyshame #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #EatingDisorders

#52SmallThings
Today was my first full day after dropping my husband off at the airport. He’ll be in Salt Lake City until the 11th. I must confess, I did spend most of the day on the couch. But I did: take a shower (skipped the hair), put on clean lounge clothes, and did the dishes that were on the counter. I just kinda snacked around, but I’m actively trying to pay attention to what I’m eating, bc usually when I’m home #alone for a while, I stress/boredom eat. So I was proud that I ate 1/2 of the frozen pizza instead of 7/8.
The hardest thing is my sugar addiction. It makes me bitchy when I can’t find anything sweet. I’m now trying to eat graham crackers/Nilla wafers instead of full-blown chocolate cookies. It’s a big step for me.
When we first got married, I was 188lbs. I lost the weight the wrong way ( #Starved myself all day, then had dinner that I cooked with my husband). I got down to 125, to where they said to gain a little but. I’m 5’6”. Now that we’ve moved again, I gained all that weight back- hovering around 190. It freaks me out and I can barely look in the mirror. I need to get down to my goal of 135.
I don’t care if it’s the wrong way, I want to lose that weight again. Feel pretty. Feel confident. Not #Bodyshame myself. I want to make my husband feel proud of me. It’s sad but true: my #Selfimage is based solely on compliments or attention I get.

Does anyone else feel like this? (Assuming you read all of this...)