Today was my first full day after dropping my husband off at the airport. He’ll be in Salt Lake City until the 11th. I must confess, I did spend most of the day on the couch. But I did: take a shower (skipped the hair), put on clean lounge clothes, and did the dishes that were on the counter. I just kinda snacked around, but I’m actively trying to pay attention to what I’m eating, bc usually when I’m home #alone for a while, I stress/boredom eat. So I was proud that I ate 1/2 of the frozen pizza instead of 7/8.
The hardest thing is my sugar addiction. It makes me bitchy when I can’t find anything sweet. I’m now trying to eat graham crackers/Nilla wafers instead of full-blown chocolate cookies. It’s a big step for me.
When we first got married, I was 188lbs. I lost the weight the wrong way ( #Starved myself all day, then had dinner that I cooked with my husband). I got down to 125, to where they said to gain a little but. I’m 5’6”. Now that we’ve moved again, I gained all that weight back- hovering around 190. It freaks me out and I can barely look in the mirror. I need to get down to my goal of 135.
I don’t care if it’s the wrong way, I want to lose that weight again. Feel pretty. Feel confident. Not #Bodyshame myself. I want to make my husband feel proud of me. It’s sad but true: my #Selfimage is based solely on compliments or attention I get.
Does anyone else feel like this? (Assuming you read all of this...)