Join the Conversation on
113 people
0 stories
9 posts
Explore Our Newsletters
What's New in

2012 Catalyst

#BpDbeautifully #PTSD #SchizoaffectiveDisorder

I genuinely did not realise how poorly my mental health was until this time, 2012 is the year i lost a parent, my dad.

Born into #domesticvioulenceabuse gives you trauma from the womb.

Im working through the change of life, which in itself is an absolute smack in the gut.

My biological family came to me after the funeral, i had moved home so it wasn’t straight after, maybe a couple of years; they said they were worried about me and that they think i needed mental health support.

Im the youngest child, i was 42 at that time, my eldest sibling is 11 years my senior, then 9 years and finally the 3rd child is 4 years older than me.

Iv survived suicide of my children’s father, built myself back up, met someone new and got married, 20 years this year.

I took their advice, i went and got help, top and bottom of the situation is, after about 7 sessions of CBT therapy, i came to building my family trauma tree!

The Catalyst for everything, smack bang centre stage was my mum, really desperately sad. They couldn’t handle me, i was brutal and broken.

I walked away from my entire biological family, i have my husband and 3 amazing children, i had my 3rd child to my husband and she glued my little island (as i like to call us.)

Hardest toughest decision i made, i think it’s 5 years now and nothing, my mum refuses to have anything to do with me or my family.

She used to leave us behind when we were little, iv spent christmas eves hiding under bridges with my brother so our dad couldn’t find us, my 2 older brothers bore the brunt of dads DVA but mum, she had her jaws wired, that just gives you a little insight.

I wet the bed until i was 11 years of age, i couldn’t concentrate in school because i was always worried my mum would be dead or left us again.

Theres years of layered abuse, obviously i’m a survivor, but im not going to lie, it made me bitter, i was strong and i have stood on my own 2 feet from as far back as i can remember.

I will talk again soon, thanks for reading xhx #BpDbeautifully

25 reactions 11 comments
See full photo

#Takingcontrol #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #Onthedaily #trustthestruggle

#BpDbeautifully we understand the concept of feeling don’t we, does anyone else feel like a magnet to them? i can walk into a room and absorb the energy immediately, can you?

18 reactions 9 comments
See full photo

Thank you #BpDbeautifully here

Just a quick note to say thank you for the add and i look forward to getting to know more of you

5 reactions 3 comments

This is what I learnt today. Have you learnt something new?

Control your actions, not emotions. You have every right to feel every emotion at whatsoever intensity.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BpDbeautifully


Exhausted after 2 days of extended working hours

We had a holiday on Monday and I have worked for the last 2 days for more than 10 hours and now I am exhausted. As per normal people, I am not efficient enough. People don’t understand this but yeah, It’s good that I was able to realise it and take it a little bit slow today. If I would have had more work to do today, I would have started to go towards anxiety but I din...so yayie on me.

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BpDbeautifully

See full photo

Disassociation #dont #LeaveMeAlone #Outofmymind #Doublesided #perspectivechanged #Indifferent #Intrigued #Hostileworkenvironment #BpDbeautifully #Curiouslydifferent #boarderlinepersonalitydisorder

Some days I can’t face the noise the maddening crowds the energy it rinses me of my inner self my mindfulness my empath vibrstions get distracted from direction or misdirected it’s very hard to understand the vibe - I listen to my body every single day of every waking moment because it has never failed to give me the Insight and willpower to conquer push through and kick the darkness the deep mistrust and dissolution to the curb where it belongs

Namaste 🙏💡🙏

See full photo

Encourage independent women #Knowyourworth #Encorage #Empowerment #Absolutely #Truestory #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #BpDbeautifully #Lovemehateme #Memyselfandi #EDUCATE #Respect

Raising little girls is not easy or for the faint hearted - poor fathers across the world struggle letting their daughters go freely into the world when its time - don’t clip her wings for she has to learn - to trust wholeheartedly that she is prepared and ready - Daughter Sister Mother Auntie Granddaughters She Female Feminine - Independence Education Hustler giving her all to fly her path with enrichment and knowledge from you from us from me myself and I

Namaste 🙏💡🙏

1 reaction 1 comment