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Whoops

I learned a valuable lesson...if I say I'm gonna make something for dinner, I gotta make sure I have it available. She decided she wanted to make eggs... but we only had 4. So she didn't get any. She's gonna make herself some oatmeal. The eggs turned out awesome. I added shredded cheese, ranch dressing and garlic Parmesan seasoning. It was a very good balance of creamy, salty, and melty. I still prefer microwaved eggs but these were yummy.

She put some CBD cream on my spine. My middle back is very crunchy and ouchy. My lumbar absolutely aches. But my hips are great.

#Caregiving #foodiemisadventures

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Dinner plans for tonight

I'm gonna make cheesy scrambled eggs with toast for dinner tonight. I'm gonna toast an English muffin for me. I'll mix my eggs with ranch dressing like I always do. It's so yummy. She loves my scrambled eggs.

I'm gonna take some chicken out of the freezer tonight. It'll be ready by Sunday. Tomorrow night I'll make pork carnitas.

I ordered some white chocolate peanut butter and 2 bags of instant mashed potatoes. They're coming tomorrow.

#foodieadventures #Caregiving

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ACCEPTANCE: 2nd of 9 Foundational Attitudes of Mindfulness As Part of Resilience

“On this sacred path of Radical Acceptance, rather than striving for perfection, we discover how to love ourselves into wholeness.”
- Tara Brach

“There is something Wonderfully Bold And Liberating
About Saying Yes To Our Entire Imperfect And Messy Life.”
- Tara Brach

The 9 Foundational Attitudes of Mindfulness also helps us to understand the significance of Full/Radical Acceptance.

First, from my own words and my own horrible things I just had to finally fully Accept: first you must grieve whatever kind of loss it is and then you must let it go (letting go/letting be - the doorway to freedom will be another post of mine here in this group) — but first, I had to grieve that surprise! I will be managing my Chronic major depressive disorder for the rest of my life, biggest surprise for my husband and I firstly was that I did not win the lottery with the type of depression that occurs once, we had no idea there was such a thing as Chronic, Recurring Major Depressive Disorder! And I had to grieve that this took my career away since my onset of this beast of an illness was at 34 years old. We had to grieve that we would struggle on 1 income because I could not work any job well enough anymore which we finally had to accept by the time I was in my early 40’s. I had to grieve that I was too sick and disabled and with our 1 income that I wouldn’t become a Mom (except to kitties). I had to grieve that this left me isolated from making new friends and I had to grieve the “friends” that deserted me when I was too sick and not myself. I had to grieve that I had never had healthy parenting from either of my parents and that I had to save myself and cut off the extremely toxic relationships with both of my parents with their narcissism and their emotional abuse to me. I had to grieve the devastating trauma that onset this horrendous illness that made me very suicidal back then and more times-even one time of that is too many times- I am sure many of us know what I mean. I also had to grieve more than once when my MDD took away my sense of self- I had to keep relearning who I am, what I like & dislike, remembering with surprise that I am actually funny and full of life and joy and positivity inherently. But, Thankfully I finally learned from my Mindfulness teachers and other experts that were better than my therapists ever were, that without learning (Radical )Acceptance and all of the integrated 9 attitudes of Mindfulness and so much more (I read psychology in my free time to learn to conquer my illness every single day) and this was my only way to attain the most beautiful inner peace, and to manifest my best life after all plus transforming into my best, most authentic self.

Acceptance- The attitude of actively recognizing that things are the way they are, even if they aren’t the way we want them to be.

Accepting Reality- mindfulness and awareness help you to *Come To Terms* with and accept things in life that are less than wonderful.

Acknowledging the present reality as it is (you don’t have to like it, it’s just how your body is feeling right now - it will not be completely just like this always/not for the rest of your life); Acceptance does not mean approval or compliance in every situation. As a mindfulness principle, acceptance means seeing the present moment as it truly is, taking it in, and living with that knowledge. You can accept a fact and decide to change it, if that seems like the appropriate choice to you. ***This principle is not about keeping things the same***, but ***it is about letting go of denial or ignorance and accepting or acknowledging what is happening in the moment.***

Accepting what is, even if that is challenging. When you know what you are dealing with, you can discover what can be mindfully changed and what has to remain as it is.

With MBCT (Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy) you can prepare yourself and find ways to cope with the bad in a way that allows you to move on and even to eventually see some of the bad as a surprisingly good thing.

There is also Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT; Hayes et al. 1999)

The Six Core Processes of ACT”).
To put it in less clinical terms and make it a bit easier to understand, Dr. Russell Harris (2011) has defined ACT as “a mindfulness-based behavioral therapy that challenges the ground rules of most Western psychology” with the goal of helping patients create a rich and meaningful life and develop mindfulness skills, even with the existence of pain and suffering.

Six core processes of ACT to develop psychological flexibility are:
Acceptance,
Cognitive Defusion,
Being Present,
Self as context,
Values,
Committed Action

Acceptance is an alternative to the instinct to avoid negative, or potentially negative, experiences. It is the active choice to be aware of and allow these types of experiences without trying to avoid or change them.

Cognitive Defusion refers to the defusion techniques that are intended to change how an individual reacts to or interacts with their thoughts and feelings rather than the nature of these thoughts and feelings. Acceptance and Commitment Therapy is not intended to limit our exposure to negative experiences, but to face them and come out the other side with a decreased fixation on these experiences.

Being Present is another familiar concept for practitioners of mindfulness-based therapy. It can be understood as the practice of being aware of the present moment while declining to attach judgment to the experience. In other words, being present involves actively experiencing what is happening without trying to predict, change, or make value judgments about the experience.

Self as Context is a simple idea that an individual is not his or her experiences, thoughts, or emotions. Instead of being one’s experiences, the “self as context” process rests on the idea that there is a self outside of the current experience.
In other words, we are not what happens to us. We are the ones experiencing what happens to us.

Values in this context are defined as the qualities that we choose to work towards in any given moment.
We all hold values, consciously or unconsciously, that direct our steps.
In ACT, we apply processes and techniques that help us live our lives according to the values that we hold dear.

#MentalHealth #Mindfulness #MajorDepressiveDisorder #ChronicIllness #Disability #ChronicFatigue #ChronicPain #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDepression #MoodDisorders #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #AnorexiaNervosa #EatingDisorders #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Addiction #ADHD #Grief #Loneliness #Fibromyalgia #Headache #Migraine #BipolarDisorder #RareDisease #Cancers #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Selfcare #Selfharm #SuicidalIdeation #SuicidalThoughts #SuicideAttemptSurvivors #Trauma #CheckInWithMe #IfYouFeelHopeless #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #Caregiving #SocialAnxiety #Agoraphobia #MightyTogether

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The appointment was great

As soon as I got in her car she asked if I wanted to go anywhere so I said yeah how about 7-Eleven. She said not a problem. So we went there and I got a cappuccino and a donut.

I kinda have been having a panic attack for the last hour but I don't know why. I have been trying to ignore my hands but I cut off the tips of my nails. I'm getting ingrown nails again. Or still. I don't know at what point it's healed.

My caseworker is going to take me and my caregiver to Aldi next month. She said she has been worried about me getting groceries cuz she used to take me to Aldi and Meijer. She knows I have been getting my groceries through Instacart for the last year and she knows I'm on a limited income. So we are going to get some food for the holidays after I get my food stamps.

I've got a nasty bleeding fissure again. I should probably go see my GI doctor. But I never got my labs done for her last year. I'll just keep an eye on symptoms and if it gets worse I will go to urgent care.

#Caregiving #behavioralhealthhome #PanicAttacks #MentalHealth

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Good morning

My hips feel great. My back not so much. And my butt cheeks feel like it got kicked. My doctor explained my butt hurts cuz I've been walking like a penguin for 3 weeks. Makes sense. Said it's musculoskeletal pain.

I've got a 10am appointment with my BHH nutritionist today. I'm gonna see if she'll take me to 7 eleven. I want to get a special drink and a bag of puff corn. I might get a cappuccino.

I reconnected with a friend who blocked me for a few years yesterday. She's only 10 minutes away from me. We're gonna go to a stitch and bitch next week. I'm gonna bring my sketch book and pens. I'm gonna try to draw a Krampus. It's at an espresso and tea shop. After we get back, I'm gonna cook dinner for us.

My caregiver used to be anorexic. When she got here in May, she was under 110lbs. Now she's around 133lb and she's much more happy with her curves. She's got more fat in the right place. I'm very proud of her.

#Relationships #Caregiving #Friendship

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Well we made dinner for each other but didn't eat at the same time.

She made me a big pot of noodles and I made her 2 cheddar brats. We're still doing parallel play while she works on her computer. I'm just happy to be close to her.

I'm going to a stitch and bitch next week with a friend who lives 10 minutes away. Then when it's done we're gonna come back to my apartment and I'll make a nice dinner for us. I'm probably gonna make garlic Parmesan chicken with noodles. I told her about my recipe and she said it sounds delicious. I've made it for my caregiver and she said it was one of my best chicken recipes. I might do a veggie to balance the dinner.

There's a witches market on the 30th. One of my favorite metaphysical shops moved a few years ago and I haven't seen it's new spot. They serve complimentary tea. They're gonna have a krampus available for pictures! I'm really excited.

December 21st is my winter solstice and a really nice holiday. Its called Yule. I'm gonna get a gift for my caregiver. I'm also planning to make peanut butter haystacks for all my friends. And I can't forget to make some for me!

I'm gonna send a bottle of chicken shit seasoning blend to my mom for Christmas. It's delicious. I think she'll like it. But just in case she doesn't, I'm gonna send her a box of cookies.

#Caregiving #Relationships #Holidays

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Placing the power in your hands to practice how to improve your wellbeing

Since this is a Practice, and in a practice, we must build upon our knowledge—here, I am going to expand upon my 1st post about the Beginner’s Mind, the first post of this new group - click to join and not miss the interconnected 9 attitudes of the wellbeing mindset of Mindfulness.

There is an emphasis on the importance of cultivating this mindset in all aspects of life.

Has anyone practiced this Beginner’s Mind or think that you will give it a try?
Any thoughts about this particular part of the whole?

Let’s break it down again:

Holding onto a particular belief limits the mind.
We accumulate a lot of conditioning along the way.
We tend to create a world where our opinions and beliefs are fixed.
As soon as we are attached to that one side, we shut off the other side-we don’t see it or hear it.

Only when we are willing to show up in each moment with a fresh, curious mind, willing to listen, knowing that possibly everything we believed and thought -that perhaps that’s not true. And, if we can maintain that freshness of mind, called a beginner’s mind—

then we can create a space where the mind can absorb, can respect the way other people think— take in new perspectives, and all of a sudden, we start to see not only a transformation in our mind, but a greater sense of calm, of clarity, and also a positive change in our relationships.

By letting go of preconceived ideas, expectations, and attachments, we can fully engage with each moment, experiencing life as it truly is, rather than through the filter of our thoughts and beliefs.

Key concepts:

Openness to possibilities:
The mind of the beginner is empty, free of the habits of the expert, ready to accept, to doubt, and open to all the possibilities.

No attachment to outcomes:
By approaching situations with a beginner's mind, one is less likely to be fixated on achieving a specific result, allowing for greater flexibility and adaptability.

And, the extremely critical skill of learning How to focus on the present moment:
This mindset encourages a deep awareness of the current experience, without getting caught up in past regrets or future anxieties; which we all know the negative consequences this has on our mental health.

We have to help ourselves to not be stuck dwelling on either the "what could have been" or the "what might happen", so that we can instead stay living in and fully enjoying the actual present moment. This is all a part of our role in managing our depression and anxiety and not letting these win and take from us and our potential and our lives that we can have.

It’s important to remember that all of this is not an achievement to be attained but rather a continuous process of self-discovery and self-transformation.

#MentalHealth #ChronicIllness #Mindfulness #MajorDepressiveDisorder #BipolarDisorder #BipolarDepression #MoodDisorders #Depression #Anxiety #GeneralizedAnxietyDisorder #Cancers #ChronicFatigue #AnorexiaNervosa #Selfcare #Addiction #Fibromyalgia #ChronicPain #Selfharm #Grief #SuicideAttemptSurvivors #SuicidalIdeation #SuicidalThoughts #Suicide #Trauma #Agoraphobia #ADHD #SocialAnxiety #SocialAnxietyDisorder #PTSDSupportAndRecovery #PTSD #ComplexPosttraumaticStressDisorder #Headache #Migraine #ChronicFatigueSyndrome #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Disability #IfYouFeelHopeless #EatingDisorders #ObsessiveCompulsiveDisorder #MightyTogether #Caregiving #CheckInWithMe #DistractMe

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You are what you eat

I don't know anything about the science behind it but food cooked by someone I love just tastes amazing. Food cooked with love feeds the soul. My caregiver made me noodles for dinner tonight. I got to play with the sauce and seasoning but she made perfect noodles. I'm a happy puppy.

#Caregiving

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I've never felt this secure in a relationship before

We're growing together and getting stronger. We do journal prompts at least once per week and then sit with my therapist to go over the answers. We're learning so much about each other. She knows everything about me and still loves me unconditionally. She takes excellent care of me and I'm exploring more about autism and ADHD so I can care for her. She actually told me last night that I saved her life. Everyone that sees us together thinks we're a really strong couple . My therapist said we're lucky to have each other.

#Caregiving #Relationships

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Trying again

So I'm overdue for another Norco and she is washing dishes but she said she's almost done. She made me a big pot of noodles for dinner. I put some Alfredo sauce on it and some garlic Parmesan seasoning blend that I got from Amazon. Unfortunately I ran out of grated Parmesan but It was delicious. I love when she makes me noodles. It's such a little gesture of love and I appreciate her efforts. She knows how to make me happy. I'm easy to please. I love it when she makes me coffee or simple food. For lunch today she warmed up a German sausage and brought me the jar of sauerkraut and a slice of bread so I could make my sandwich how I like it. She's so thoughtful.

#Caregiving