Loneliness

Hello, in online i always feel like that i want to be loved or have a partner or someone that does care to me, i have no idea why but when i try to get a kind one or some relation i always fail and that feeling gets me lonely or that no one loves me or likes me or i am the worst, so yeah i am very bad and i have anxiety when people choose someone else to like not me or they're taken or they get the care they wanted or they basically don't care, i always expect people to treat me well and gentle instead even by advice they just being mean or they put the blame to me, i feel i am a bad person that no one likes

#Anxiety #Advice #Love #MentalHealth

Hi, my name is GrayGroundhog5684. I'm here because I am having one of those bad days. I’ve been pretty stable for a while with medication. But today has been rough. Fighting back tears, turning it into anger by mistake.. flashbacks and loneliness. I just need a friend.

#MightyTogether #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PTSD

Hi, my name is hmpctdw. I honestly joined this app to find a friend, someone that understands what I’m going through or can at least empathize. Bring chronically ill can be lonely.

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Migraine #cptsd #Fibromyalgia #HidradenitisSuppurativa #functionalneurologicaldisorder

Very high pain day Want to take a nap Pain so high can't sleep drank bottle of Javvy and want another so deeply I am on verge of crying.Pain at 8. Took 2 tramadol and 3/4 of a gummy.Hips fine. SI joints questionable. Lumbar omg fuck
Migraine finally goed away.
Trying blueberry and cream Javvy.
Feel sad. Body broken. Lonely.

It’s been a year since I’ve been here and I genuinely do not recognize half the things posted here. Nothings changed. The same giant hole of empty and void is still trapped inbetween my rib cage and I still scream a silent scream . I am not whole I am not seen. I am not kept I am not loved. I cannot find solace that pushes the ache back. I cannot find peace that makes my insides settle. I am a live wire in water and I can feel myself going non stop without fail. It’s been 2 years since her. Two years since then. 9 months of endless grief an onslaught of things I can’t understand or control or shove back into its hole. I am a shell of a houSe i’m the cracks in the foundation that’s been broken into dozens of pieces . I do not exist as a person or a thing I exist as pain and loss. My memories are still not returned my family has all but abandoned and I wish someone would take my hand and tell me to breathe. I wish someone would tell me to breathe and it’s ok to breathe. I wish for the life I had I wish for peace I wish for grace. I wish like a stupid child but God does not grant favors down here. not to sinners like me. I am alone I am lonely and J am not ok.

A mother's intuition

Destroyed by something Harrowing

Her children's ambition

And their feats of Daring

HER WISDOM TO MAKE WELL

TO WORRY AMONGST THE SPELL

TO BRING HER DOWN

WITHOUT HER SON

TO THWART THE HANDS

WITHOUT THEIR QUILL

TO EASE THE NIGHT

WITHOUT THE HOPE

SOME WRITE AMIDST

LOVE'S LONELY DOPE

ADSUNDER THROWN FROM SEA TO SEA

AND SOUGHT FOR SHORE

AMIDST THE WAVES

FOUND ONLY KNAVES

AND SHE WAS CALLED WIFE

I do it For You

TO Your Gig

N your Women of Song

MAKE IT BIG

THIS lonely Song is how Long

TO AN OPEN DOOR

to the Breath of Life and the Garden

TO ALL YOU WANT IS MORE

WHEN ALL I HOLD DEAR IS OUR ARDEN

WHEN MY CREATIONS COME HOME

LIKE FALL LEAVES ABOUT TO BE BORN

WHEN YOUR PAGE CREATES

IN A GARDEN OF HEALTH

SO TIME ABATES

AND SILENCE IS MY WEALTH

WHEN YOUR PAGE TURNS

AND THE SEASON EARNS

ITS SORROW

BEFORE THE WINTER'S BLANKET

ALL MY TOMORROWS

I GIVE TO YOU AS TRINKET

IN YOUR REALM OF ROADSTOPS AND DREAMS

SOMETIMES OUR REALMS

AND THEN THERE'S HOME

40 years ago I was a professional ballet dancer I just found an old grainy recording of a performance I was in on YouTube called “ zodiaque” with Lewis London ballet. Things were so amazing especially with my partner who has died I had a breakdown first of many … I feel so pathetic but I left ballet behind and tried to live a normal life. I miss it so much and miss Amanda so much. I just started to cry and haven’t cried in years. Every time I feel I have a handle on life something hits me square in the chest. A few years ago I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder amongst other things and am on so much medication I don’t know where I’m at sometimes. Loneliness and memories are slowly killing me. I feel isolated and like I don’t fit it anywhere.
I’m happy that this forum is available to share this kind of stuff. The pain probably more mental than physical is so overwhelming everyone I loved had died and left me at times it’s so unbearable I often feel like ending it. I think google is sick of me looking up ways .
My dog “ lily” died 3 years ago and I’m truly heartbroken.
I live on a boat in the uk and am struggling with health and maintenance of it.
I guess you could attach the same comment to me too.
I posted this message to reach out and hope that maybe this helps someone. To carry on there maybe something really positive ahead.