mentalillnesses

I feel good an I’m happy about that yet I’m worried, my reason is today I felt little pain an discomfort. It’s was a good day I even just got back from a walk . It’s cold outside 20 degrees . I feel worried that something like death is coming being Iv heard rumored that most people that hurt or die always seem to talk about having a good day before the die . My cousin who use to chat with online for a few years was always sick 🤧 or hurt in some way then one day he was feeling good and cleaned his room had conversation was happy an stuff the next day he was dead .an it’s not the only time I have heard that type of thing happening , an me I been hurting for over a decade. An today I felt pretty good . Even slept half the day not sure why I’m mentioning it maybe I think I’m gonna die soon to an don’t want to .

I am stuck in my head from doing what I fell is right so I waste lots of time doing other stufff and resting . I got issues with all the hashtags above . I fell like I’m wasting my time for no reason and I’m tired of it plus it makes me upset .
I am gonna give it till this end of summer in hopes I can get back on my feet . I want to mention I was asked to leave a bar an grill last week had 3 beers and was giving a receipt an told to go talk to the manager. I asked to pay my tab didn’t leave a tip and walked out . I fell they did that because I drink fast being I an issue with chronic pain that gets severe at times I go drink like 4-6 beers which eases my pain and I can sit still an relax at least for a little while but this day they didn’t serve me so I split . I can only imagine how I looked sitting at the bar in discomfort trying to have some beers to easy it . I must have looked like a weirdo . Lol how awful 😞 I’m gonna miss that place I don’t want to go back there’s no reason which hurts but what can I do . Either way I see it as a good reason to stop drinking and to take another path an try to better myself . Good news though I got a doc appointment soon an I might be able to get some proper meds so I don’t have to use alcohol and pot to easy it .

Hi I have not celebrated in a few decades, not that I don’t eat something or know it’s a holiday, although I have forgotten a few times that it’s a holiday. But I don’t decorate, I have not put a Christmas tree up in many years . No presents 🎁 nothing I can blame my issues and my lack of currency 💴 and now I can say it’s that I’m alone and think why if there’s no one to chat with and I can go to restaurant to eat an go home . I’d like to get back into the love of holidays but don’t . I’m curious if others are like this ? An how do you feel about it ? I feel dumb not being apart of the life I saw growing up .

I hear breathing an sometimes soft whispering around me I live alone . When this happens if I am thinking of what to buy to cook dinner , and If I don’t immediately start saying what I want or writing it down the soft breathing moves away and my thoughts go with it , my mind goes blank an I can’t remember what I’m trying to do . I hate it so much and they don’t stop bothering I even telling to leave me alone to go away that I don’t see them and I fell like someone grades or touch’s my butt an I hear them breathing but there is no one with me . I have told a few people about this one one couple responded with your place needs a cleansing. They said sage and something else I don’t remember. And not just that but today as I was on instagram a post comes up it said if you have to tell more then 3 people what you trauma or problems that there is nothing wrong with you that you are just after attention. This made me think because I have talked to more then 3 different people about my trauma/life and not one of them was helpful aside from one lady an we just text never meet each other and I’m still bothered . So idk what to think of that . I just know know so people say weird things is all I can say . #ChronicPain #PTSD #Depression #mentalillnesses #hurt

Hi people I use medication everyday I’m hurt I can’t change what’s wrong with me and I fell like my use of meds has shortened my health . I’m not intrigued in death at the moment not sure if I’d ever be but it’s something to avoid for me . Idk if I can say this here but my heart is swollen my doctor told me that like seven years ago . I’m scared and don’t know enough about life to understand how to be born again #ChronicPain #Depression #PTSD #ADHD #parinoid #mentalillnesses

Hello I come here an post or browse an chat or voice my opinion on others post an I usually do it without being honest, being I don’t actually post something’s that bother I just don’t think of them or it whatever they are called . So on this post I thought I would ask how can a person deal with the fact that they can’t post or tell you what bugs because of what it was , the reason something or someone hurt me an the way it happened is not safe to post I don’t want to tell people I know because I don’t think I can handle or trust they would not bring it up or tell others so I just can’t say anything . And then there is the mental Dr. Who tells me they will report to the police if they feel it was a crime or if needed and being I believe that’s what they gonna do and being I’m not really comfortable with being questioned about it I have no interest in telling a Dr so I am telling you this because I at times want to talk about it instead of just pushing it aside . So my question is what can a person do ? If they can’t just talk about it . Because it’s not easy when you end up alone just because you are not comfortable talking about something and it affects you enough that you don’t actually socialize or go out or can’t make friends because you push everyone away how would you deal with something like that ?
I do want to add that I did not hurt anyone nor did I commit a crime but that what happened can be considered both of those things . Anyone got advice they can share ?

Hello there ever I am stressed 😥 I can’t sleep and I keep thinking of a way to escape my reality I guess it’s called I play on my phone I watch tv I cook I eat I clean and yet here in the middle of the night I can’t sleep because I want to get high and forget for awhile, not anything spacific but just clear my mind by occupying it with whatever stuff I can with high . Except I’m not gonna get high I gonna tell all of you here on the mighty so that hopefully it will pass as I am texting, and it does help some but it can’t be fixed at least not that I’m aware. Thanks everyone for reading my middle of the night thoughts . # #ChronicPain #Depression #mentalillnesses #PTSD

Hello I have made the decision to drop my phone account because I have a family plan with six other family members an two of them don’t always pay , so around 3-4 years ago my sister asked me for help to get on my Verizon service plan I chose to help her she after like a month got her boyfriend a phone on my account as well and I let her because she promised she would pay their part well she did for like 6 months she made her payments for their devices an services but after that she started not making full payments being short every month started with a 20 went all the way to me have to put $150 just so I wouldn’t get my phone shut down well this last month after begging her repeatedly month after month she still skipped out on $60 this last month well I used up my savings I got a couple hundred dollars left and I need a water heater for my place so I have decided to cancel my account because I am under contract with all the devices on my account and I can’t pitch in for my sister and her boyfriend anymore, I feel awful about it but they are both older than me and earn more money so it’s like no way I don’t want to anymore. Am I wrong for doing this to my sister ? I feel I am but I don’t actually think I am .

I find it deeply sad and soul destroying, that if I mention what I’m struggling with to my loved ones, the answer seems #yesweknow when wanting to share the rapid intensification of #symptoms of either #Bipolar or #BPD or #Depression etc…

Please remember friends, find your tribe. The people who #Suffer and live with what you do. This is where the #Understanding and #Kindness you’re seeking will be found.
I don’t believe anyone, no matter how much they love you, can even get a tiny glimpse of your #emotionalpain .
Don’t blame,, find others who feel and understand and have similar #mentalillnesses .
I hope this little nugget helps you in your #journey back to you.
Bipolarlinedeb ♥️🌹🌹