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Hi, my name is happypat75. I call myself that since I left my husband of 49 years. We are Americans who moved to Thailand our dream retirement home. He was a good father of our 4 children now adults and a good provider. He is very selfish and was always a spoiled son.
When we moved I started seeing a different side to him. I overlooked a lot until it progressed. After moving, together 24/7 then covid affected us as everyone else.
My stress was worse, I got sicker being taken to the emergency room often for pain.
Our marriage was bad and my health deteriorated. We flew to Bangkok to see a specialist. Many tests with wonderful care, I was diagnosed with Fibromyalgia and Polymyalgia Rheumatica, added to my diagnosis of IBS in my 30s.
I knew our marriage was over when I told him our marriage improves or I leave. Our home became a horrible place to live in. Then the accidents started to happen to me. It progressed to physical abuse. I was then diagnosed with Kidney disease stage 3.
I had been researching his behaviors for two years. He could have written the book for Covid Narcissist. His behavior was word for word for the diagnosis. I saw an email from a collection agency. He spent our joint savings accounts, investments and most of my personal savings. I was very sick and trusted him with everything for years. He was gambling still is.
I moved out. I live in a lovely Thai home by myself in a quiet gated area. Thank God I worked all my life. I did all the normal things, change bank accounts and took my name of everything. I am a strong believer in Jesus and know I could not get through all my years without his love, strength, guidance and my faith. I believe everything happens for a reason.
Where am I now one year on my own. I have the same health issues. I take half the dosage of meds and eliminated some. I have lost thirty eight pounds by eating Vegan food. I enjoy Thai delicious vegan foods. My last Dr. visit all my counts were great. She was amazed my change.
All of us with chronic health issues know it is not one day at a time it can be one minute at a time. When I feel good and go out I can get sick, must go home weak, dizzy and hurting all over. I vomit a lot. Some days I do a few things then others I can not. I cook a little and when we eat out I order extra foods and freeze it. I have chores I should do but I say I will give away my big clothes someday or clean out drawers/organize cupboards some day. I try not to let it bother me but it does.
I try to keep a positive attitude it is hard. I read " My worse day alone is better than my best days with husband the past 5 years." I am not a victim, I am a survivor of an abusive husband and my health issues. I look at my marriage as a Blessing, I have my kids, grandkids and great grandbaby. I pray for all dealing with abuse and health issues. Be Strong, all you Mighties Phra Jao GOD -uay phorn-BLESS -khun YOU (Thai) HAPPYPAT75
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