Bigheart

Something a friend of a friend said that blew my mind... because I thought I was the only one who operated like this: "I'm sorry, my entire Facebook is probably going to fill up with Yule cat (seasonal depression) posts, likely for a while.

Since the move, I haven't had friends close by. This is how I talk to you all, and I'd feel guilty if I more specifically gave play by plays to only a select few (just inundation of cat info).

Because, one on one, you all would be too nice to tell me I'm too much. 😅"

💜💚

#Bigheart #toomuch #Newfriends

#ADHD #MentalHealth #TheMighty #Bekind

Photo of one of my walks with one of my babies (2022)

People should not be able to just use and abuse you while taking you for granted. They often say they’re going to pay you back when you aren’t even asking for anything in return. I guess this kind of makes me feel like being alone is the ultimate resort as opposed to a beat up pillow top mattress. I’m not #narcissistic , but personalities can be terribly #colorful , #compulsive , and #Complex . Like I have a #Bigheart . When I’m at work, I feel extremely welcoming and hospitable. I also have social anxiety along with cardiomyopathy, and the best way that I’ve been coping have not been the best. I quit my #Workout routine because of how overwhelming things got. In March, I suffered a massive #PanicAttack that led to a fluid buildup in my lungs and I’ve been trying to get better since. Going #Backtowork made me feel frightened because on top of my #BPD , I often feel I’m not useful or too useful. Not everyone deserves to be taken in and showered with #hospitality . I feel like that only makes me seem #hypocritical . On top of that, I’m battling #Addiction and #Depression .

When will I be loved. #widowfor2years