I forgot a very important date for my BFF today. She had an appointment for a biopsy and I completely forgot! I had it in my calendar but I forgot to set the reminder.
I'm devastated. Crushed. Deflated. She said she was disappointed and hurt that I forgot and I don't blame her. She said I can sometimes be self absorbed. Here is what she wrote:
Honestly, I'm hurt you didn't remember. You knew how scared I was and you said you would be "there every step of the way".
I was sitting in the waiting room at the hospital shaking like leaf and I get a text from you telling me how bummed you are about your job. I listen to all your issues about anxiety, depression, money and/or job. I may not always be able to to help you but I do pay attention.
I know this sounds harsh but I'm truly hurt that you didn't remember this ONE thing of mine.
I know you have tough time dealing with things day to day and I truly worry about you but you can sometimes be too self involved.
If it's OK, I'm going to pass on Saturday. I love you but I need a break".
We had plans to do some gardening at my place. She's been helping me because I have zero gardening experience and her garden always looks so professional and lovely.
I can't imagine what she must think of me. Of what her husband must think of me.
I'm truly devastated and not in a good place right now. She means everything to me. I did something to hurt her. I don't know if I can ever forgive myself.
I totally get it. I do talk about my issues too much. I hope I have not lost my best friend of 34 years. I could not live without her. I'm such a burden and a bother and a loser. FML.
#Nothappy #verysad #regret #Heartbroken #dissapointment