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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is Larawithasmile. I'm here because I am an excellent teacher and have just been diagnosed with BPD. I have always known something was happening but the doctors always focused on the PTSD from family abuse. But now with the diagnosis I feel relief but also sadness at struggling until 51yrs old thinking I was going mad. Any advice on how I move forward with this new diagnosis?

#MightyTogether #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PTSD


I’m new here!

Osiyo, Ehisdi dagwado. Cherokee for "hello, my name is Pain".
I had been here before, during which my mental health was much worse, but after a lot of releasing in another place, and a doctor's prescription for my pains made things so so much worse, I've finally been able to shed a lot of my mental stress...However, I still get snapped at regularly and treated like a pet by my wife, sooooo am going to try this once again...
#MightyTogether #ChronicPain #Abuse

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Its happening again, and I am much less strong this time, hard dinner, remind me father's day is for cigarettes, sorry

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"Happy Father's Day To the Hard Knocks "

Happy Father's day to all of the men who are trying to raise better men. To the men who are trying to raise better women to put out into the world. To the men who are trying to break generational trauma. To the men who put forth effort every day to be better husband's. You were not a mistake or a freak of nature. You are royalty. You are strong. You are worthy to be loved. You were and are not forgotten. You will imprint a memory of your existence through your children. Never forget that. So every choice you make as a father and husband matters.
Happy Father's day to the women who were once little girls who did not have anyone to validate them as the royalty that they were and still are. You are loved. You are worthy. You are beautiful. You are strong. You are intelligent. You are not weak. You are pure. For those of you who had a terrible or absent father. I'm sorry because it's not ok. Forgive him for not realizing what he gave up. Forgive him for not understanding the affect that the pain he was inflicting upon you would do to you. Forgive him for the false narratives that his abuse or absence taught you as a little girl.
To everyone. I'm sorry that you had to raise yourselves . That life taught you terrible lessons that you had to learn on your own. I'm sorry you were not protected. But you survived and that's all that matters. Now it's your turn to do better and be better. Teach your children the things you wish your father taught you. Love them the way you wanted a father to love you. Guide them the way you always wanted your father to guide you. Respect the choices they make good and bad but let them know that no matter what you will always be there for them to welcome them with open arms.
To all of the single mothers' who have to be Mom and Dad. Thank you. Despite what society says, you can still raise strong, independent, wise, responsible, respectful, loving, kind and awesome children. Just treat your sons and daughters with respect and let them know that they are capable of doing anything they put their focus on. Treat your children with care and let them know how valuable they are . Protect them. Let them see a better you. Not the stereotypes or labels the world places on single mothers. They will always remember the lessons mama taught them . They will eventually remember the sacrifices you made in order for them to be where they are today. And if for some reason they don't. Life will give it all back to you in one way or another. To the orphans who were raised in the system. I'm sorry for what life burdened you with. I know it wasn't easy. The constant moving. The constant abuse for some. Feeling as if you didn't belong in this world. I'm sorry. I'm here to tell All of you that the fact that you are still here proves the warriors that you are. Most would have given up but you didn't. That proves how important your place in this existence is. I know it's hard to forget the pain. But you made it out when most didn't. Everytime you start feeling the sting of depression just ask yourself this question. Can I change the past? The answer will always be the same for all of us. No. What you can change is how you choose to live your life today. What you can change is who you allow in your circle and space. What you can change is how you react to things. Sometimes we place our energy on the wrong things and people. You have the power now but as a child you didn't and had to accept whatever came in your direction. But you're not a child anymore. You can take that power back that your offenders took from you. Change the things you can and learn to accept the things you know you cannot change. Such as other peoples actions and thoughts towards you. You don't have to cry on Father's day anymore. You might have not had a dad but realize that you are a parent now and what you do as one is what matters now. Not your past. Much love to the hard knocks out there Lilliath M Ali.

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Mental Health Documentary (⚠️TRIGGER WARNING⚠️)

Yesterday I watched a really interesting documentary about a family of 12 siblings, 6 of whom were diagnosed with Schizophrenia, varying in degrees of severity.

It gave me perspective on what life is like for people who’s loved ones suffered from mental health disorders. It also provided insight into why some people interact with me differently throughout the progression of my disease and how I’m not the only one who struggles because of it.

The documentary is called “6 Schizophrenic Brothers” (I found it on Amazon Prime but I believe it’s on other streaming platforms).

⚠️Trigger Warning: the documentary discusses very difficult topics, including: suicide, homicide, sexual abuse, domestic violence & substance abuse

‼️Additional Warning: I did find some of what the non-schizophrenic family members described how their siblings disorder affected them difficult to watch.

I debated whether or not to post this because of the potentially triggering subjects covered, however, I feel like it gave me a better appreciation for my loved ones and an understanding that I’m not the only one who struggles as a result of my diagnosis- something I find I fall short of considering/recognizing.

#FamilyAndFriends #MentalHealth #Caregiving #Schizophrenia

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Struggling to Move Forward

It seems like the emotions come in waves but they're not small waves. They seem like they can drown me at times. Sometimes I chalk up those intense moods to Bipolar Disorder or Boderline Personality Disorder and while those mental illnesses do impact my moods, I can't help but think there is more to it. I've been told that emotions and their varying intensity are part of the healing process. Being a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, Narcissistic abuse and sexual assault as an adult it seems obvious that my emotions would be chaotic. As a child, emotional regulation was never taught to me. I learned to shut down my emotions and reprimand myself for feeling anything "bad' (anger, fear, sadness ect.) Though I am making strides in healing (or so it seems at times) more often than not I find myself struggling to find joy, motivation to keep going and hope that things will get better. I have a myriad of coping skills but some days it just seems like it's never enough. I know there are things I need to stop telling myself, such as "it's been a few years, now get over it." Or "he's in prison, it's over." Sometimes I wonder how much of what I tell myself are actually things I've already been told by those that abused me. For now though, I'm just trying to keep my head above water. The waves of depression and hopelessness seem stronger than ever and I just want to stay afloat. So perhaps it's more than Bipolar or BPD. Maybe if I actually acknowledge my feelings and experiences things will start to get better. May if I just acknowledge that I'm allowed to feel how I do then I will feel motivated but for now, I don't want to drown. #BipolarDisorder #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #PostTraumaticStressDisorder

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What is bpd like when a woman is on her period?

Increased emotional intensity: Women with BPD might experience their already intense emotions at a heightened level during their period. This could include feeling more:






Relationship strain: The emotional rollercoaster of a period, combined with BPD symptoms, can make it harder to maintain healthy relationships. This could lead to:

More arguments with loved ones

Feeling misunderstood or isolated

Increased fear of abandonment

Impulsive behaviors: The urge to engage in risky or impulsive behaviors might be stronger during a period. Examples include:

Substance abuse


Reckless spending

Feeling overwhelmed: The combination of physical and emotional changes during menstruation can make it feel overwhelming for some women with BPD. This may lead to:

Difficulty coping with daily tasks

Increased feelings of emptiness or worthlessness

Suicidal thoughts (It's important to seek immediate help if this occurs)

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What is it like to date a person living with bpd?


Emotional intensity: People with BPD often experience emotions very strongly and intensely. This can range from passionate love to crushing fear or anger. It can be difficult to navigate these emotional shifts, especially if they seem sudden or unpredictable.

Fear of abandonment: A core feature of BPD is a fear of being left alone. This can manifest in clingy behavior, possessiveness, or jealousy. It can be emotionally draining and create a sense of walking on eggshells.

Unstable relationships: BPD can make it hard to maintain healthy relationships. Idealization of partners followed by intense devaluation can be a common pattern. This constant push-pull dynamic can be confusing and hurtful.

Impulsive behaviors: People with BPD may engage in impulsive actions like reckless spending, substance abuse, or self-harm. These behaviors can be a concern and create instability in the relationship.

Positive aspects:

Deep connections: People with BPD can be incredibly passionate and loyal. When they feel secure in a relationship, they can be deeply devoted and loving partners.

Empathy and understanding: People with BPD often have a heightened sensitivity to emotions. They can be very empathetic and understanding of your feelings.

Personal growth: Dating someone with BPD can challenge you to grow emotionally and develop stronger communication skills. Learning about BPD can also increase your overall understanding of mental health.

Important to remember:

Not everyone with BPD experiences these traits to the same degree.

BPD is treatable. Therapy can help people with BPD manage their symptoms and build healthier relationships.

Communication and setting boundaries are crucial in any relationship, but even more so when dating someone with BPD.

It's important to take care of yourself too. Dating someone with BPD can be emotionally demanding. Make sure you prioritize your own well-being and have a strong support system in place.

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What causes borderline personality disorder?

Genetics: Studies on twins and families suggest a genetic predisposition to BPD. If a close relative has BPD, you may be at a higher risk of developing it. However, genes are not destiny, and having a family history doesn't guarantee you'll get BPD.

Brain changes: Research indicates possible structural and functional changes in the brain regions that control emotions and impulses in people with BPD.

Environmental factors: Traumatic life experiences, especially during childhood, are a frequent theme among people with BPD. These can include abuse (emotional, physical, or sexual), neglect, abandonment, or a chaotic family environment.

Here's a more detailed breakdown of these factors:

Genetics: BPD likely isn't caused by a single gene, but rather a combination of genes that increase susceptibility. These genes might influence how you process emotions or react to stress.

Brain changes: Studies using brain imaging techniques have shown potential differences in brain structure and function in people with BPD. These differences might involve the areas involved in regulating emotions, impulses, and relationships. It's important to note that research hasn't definitively established whether these changes cause BPD or are a result of the disorder.

Environmental factors: Many people with BPD report experiencing some form of childhood trauma or a persistently unstable environment. These experiences can affect emotional development and make it harder to manage emotions and build healthy relationships.

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What does bpd stand for, what does it mean?

BPD stands for Borderline Personality Disorder. It's a mental health condition that affects how you feel about yourself and others, and how you manage your emotions. Here's a breakdown of the key aspects of BPD:

Emotional instability: People with BPD experience intense and frequent mood swings. These emotions can feel overwhelming and can change rapidly.

Unstable relationships: BPD can make it difficult to maintain healthy relationships. People with BPD may have a pattern of intense, idealizing relationships that can quickly turn stormy. Fear of abandonment is a common theme.

Distorted self-image: People with BPD may have a shaky or unclear sense of who they are. Their self-image can be influenced by how others perceive them.

Impulsive behaviors: People with BPD may engage in impulsive and risky behaviors, such as reckless spending, substance abuse, or unsafe sex. These behaviors are often a way to cope with intense emotions.

Suicidal thoughts or self-harm: People with BPD are at an increased risk of suicidal thoughts or self-harmful behaviors. This may be a way to express intense emotional pain or to feel something when feeling emotionally numb.

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