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"An Exploration: Dream Therapy & You."

I woke up this morning after having had a very interesting dream. I've always thought that Sigmund Freud and Carl Jung's work on Dream Theory was rubbish, given that most of my dreams are silly, but this last one was profound in its realism, and makes me think that they were not just onto something, they were geniuses.

So it's only dreams related to real life (present or past) that matter - not just any random dream. (Flying on the back of a magical hippo in your underpants doesn't count, there's nothing to learn there!). It's got to relate to an incident that you have experienced or are experiencing. A recreation of the event.

A random example: You're at home, in the company of someone you know well. You get into an argument, and it gets vicious, possibly violent. For whatever reason, let's assume that person is no longer in your real life (moved on, deceased, whatever reason applies), so you can't ask them about the incident in reality, therefore pay attention to the dream. It will reveal an extension of their personality, and you may learn a few things about them that you hadn't realised before. It will likely be unpleasant, though very cathartic - because it will give you some understanding and insight on the issue.

Freud and Jung were not the first to come up with Dream Theory, they just made it a proper science. A key example of this was in Ancient Greece: they did their own version of Dream Theory in a place called Epidaurus. There was a temple to the god Asclepius (god of medicine), son of the god Apollo (god of healing in general.) People who required healing went there and slept upon the ground of the temple overnight. Asclepius would 'inspire' them through revelatory dreams, then the priests would help interpret them in the morning. (Oh, and harmless snakes were in the temple as well, because they were symbolic of Asclepius and believed to help promote the dreams. They freely moved around as you slept, including over you.)

Back to the dream. In it, you likely experience it from the perspective of 'first person' (as yourself, seeing through your own eyes) and/or 'third person' (from a distance, watching yourself. 'Second person' is never you.) Either way, you get to experience the incident safely. No matter what happens in the dream, it's not happening in reality, because you are asleep. Because of this, you can witness the incident without being 100% involved in it. If you get injured in the dream, no pain will be felt, for instance. You will likely feel the emotions, but nothing physical. No broken bones, no nothing. You are safe.

When you wake up, you will likely still feel emotions related to the dream: anger, sadness, fear, whatever. During this time, write down as much of the dream as you can remember, while it still lingers. Most dreams we don't remember for more than a few seconds/minutes, but ones like these tend to linger for a little while, because we had so much psychological investment in them. Make sure you write down the parts that are revelatory - that you didn't notice in reality.

Next step. When your emotions are gone and your head is clear (say, the next day or so), go back to your notes and reflect upon them.

🔸️ Some questions to reflect upon:

📍 What did the dream reveal that you didn't experience during the real incident?
📍 What did the dream tell you about how you coped with the incident?
📍 What did the dream tell you about how the other person coped with the incident?
📍 What feelings did the dream evoke while you were asleep?
📍 What feelings did the dream evoke while you were awake? (After the dream happens, there's always a secondary emotion(s) you feel while awake as your brain tries to sort out what to make of it.)
📍 If you witness that you are the one at 'fault' in the dream, can you acknowledge this to yourself? Can you try to understand why it happened, and seek to forgive yourself?
📍 It you witness that it was not you at 'fault', can forgive the other person? (It's okay if you can't, but try to see their motivation: did they react the way they did because of anger? Fear? Guilt/shame? What else?)
📍 It's possible that you are both equally at 'fault'. If that is the case, then perhaps you are looking at a core difference between you, irreconcilable or otherwise. Seeing this, can you forgive your part in it? Can you move on from the situation, with your new knowledge?
📍 Are there any changes you would make to your real life? (This is working under the assumption that you cannot reach the other person, so any changes must be about yourself, not them.)
📍 If you feel you need to change something about yourself personally in reality, do you have any supports who can help you? (Family? Friends? A therapist? A psychiatrist?)

After going through all of that, it's important to acknowledge the hard work you've put into the reflection. (It's not an easy thing to do, and may churn up possible guilt/shame, especially if you feel you are the one at 'fault'.) It is something that will require some self-care. But it is also something worth treating with respect: Celebrate it, if you can, you've earned it.

#Dream #Dreaming #PTSD #Trauma #Therapy #MentalHealth #Journaling #analysis #freud #jung #Grief #Shame #Selfcare #Recovery

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Depression, Grief, Anxiety and power

What's the deal when those sans status, position, influence, low in all known hierarchies not just professional but also within network of family and friends are served with lemons all their life? It could well be other way round too. The repeated failures, setbacks, loss, defeats...what's the significance of the such emptiness from the inside and outside? How does it further sap you of self-worth and your 'being'? You are disempowered. Powerlessness is experienced in all its hollowing, enervating debiltations. Most importantly the world further humiliates you by denying the validity of your grief, your angst and your loss.

'Oh come on... Nothing earthshaking has happened to you... Others have had it worse... you need to move on... You are stewing far too long...You are just making a pathetic display of your misery..' are common ways of dismissing your loss. And then if you already are a person of no social capital and standing, the disregard and dismissal of your grief, depression is even more felt. Many become even intolerant, finding fault a lot more. Your lapses, errors become extremely glaring and inexcusable. Indeed it's not something you can apologise for as your entire self is condemned. You are avoided, cast aside and isolation is complete. You cannot be leveraged by anyone as you are of no practical use. I as a retired school teacher of no consequence suffering from series of losses each iteratively more intense and damaging, is unworthy of empathy leave alone sympathy. My suffering, my loss, my anguish becomes more easily dismissable for my 'being' is of no consequence.

In the gravely instrumental and game mindset world where all are endowed with power to navigate and negotiate their way through, what do completely destitute folks my sorts do? A sense of being vaporised...ignored, denied, constantly contested where the onus of losses, privations, misery are on my own wretched self😔😢 Of course I myself wouldn't consider being bereft of any values, worth and character being fairly well grounded in sociology, history and politics but these are seen to be so merit less in today's instrumental world. My lament, my despair and cries echoes in empty rooms of my house. Absence of power is a double whammy I endure in repeated loops reduced to a scrounging, prostrate, gooey state.
#Grief #power #Anxiety #Loneliness #Shame #SuicidalThoughts

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Moroseness unlimited…

I lost my father. Then I had to give up my job. I was humiliated and sidelined and the organization I worked for was indeed doing little value addition. Then my wife decided to leave me. We separated. In the process I also lost a beautiful house built on the hills with so much passion, hope and dreams together. I lost the entire eco system - literal and social. Later I lost both my dogs too. They were intensely soulful creatures who grew with us and so central in our relationship. But i bear no ill will towards my ex - just shame and guilt that I couldn’t take good care of her and couldn’t afford much meaning to her. Last year i lost my mother. Not that we were very close and we got along too well but still my long visits to her home located in rich sylvan surroundings and warm caretakers was lost too. Most of friends and acquaintances disappeared as well. Kins were too self opinionated and who constantly invalidated my grief and indeed always belittled my ‘being’ for long even before my life took the turn for the worse. Except for an old uncle of mine i don’t feel like seeking out an extended family psychologically illiterate and shorn of aesthetic and cultural capital and too caught in their self righteousness.

Acute uprootedness, loneliness, emotional exhaustion hollows and wrings you out. That i’m much late in my adulthood and almost going to be an ‘elder’ makes matters more shameful. I live alone (have no siblings either let alone kids) with my new daschund just doing what little needed to keep me going - cooking, gardening, reading and blogging. I manage to do some art work too. Medicines seem to wearing off in its effect to keep me sane and counseling too over so many years barely of little help anymore.

The overwhelming failures and setbacks all my life and so repeated despite being well qualified, well read, and contributed so much to my work domain (again all painfully unrecognised) affects me to the extent that suicidal thoughts are always at the top of my mind. The misery, dismay, shock of how horribly matters have gone wrong, having been cheated by people, circumstances and I dare say by Gods themselves surges and spikes in waves choking you, reducing you to complete tears and feeling crushed. i’m completely invisible and destitute today and making each day is a painful and exhausting struggle. It’s bad faith that still prevents me doing the inevitable. #SuicidalIdeation #Loneliness #Shame #Guilt #miseryofliving #Grief

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What’s your name? #Depression #Anxiety #Relationships #FamilyAndFriends #Hope #Shame #MentalHealth

What’s your name? People and life might try and call you many names. Names like, forgotten, broken, damaged or unworthy. They are not your names. Your name is also not hopeless, too much, victim or unwanted.

Your name is “precious, worthy, loved and unique “. You are a work in progress whose time to shine will come. You are not just a survivor but a thriver. You are not alone. You matter. Call the negative labels out for what they are, lies.

Hope calls your name!

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#dailyBread #MentalHealth from #Depression #Anxiety #Guilt #Shame

From my neck of the woods, I say happy Sunday evening! I hope our week will carry us to greater depths of the knowledge of God. May he allow us to focus on our “daily bread,” or our daily nutritional substance, and not attempt to figure out the following day’s needs.

This day started with me petitioning God for wisdom concerning a friend’s health. Hours later, I learned the person left this earth hours before my request was made known to our Lord. I am content. He knows all things. Healing does not require my stamp of approval from a learned societal (earthly) throne room position.

A surrendered life allows the Lord to be Lord, in all things.

Even if understanding is limited and out of reach, God is faithful to hear those petitions for wisdom as well. He is interested in us trusting him with our naked shame, which we often believe we must cover ourselves from BEFORE walking with the Father. Not so. That is a result of “the fall” that drops us from the closeness of our relational Creator, The Lord God Almighty.❤️

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How to cope when you have a disability/ mental health and are unemployed?

How to not feel like a loser/ worthless not being able to contribute as a member to society; and fill your time, I try to volunteer or make up for it, but sometimes I compare myself to other people my age and feel pathetic :( I want to be kind to myself while working to change my life. #unemployed #Work #Student #Shame #tough #sad #Comparison #Anxiety #Depression #help #Support

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How to accept your mental health?

When you struggle to accept it as a part of you and want to push it away, be someone who isn’t anxiety prone or depressive prone but also how to accept it or be self compassionate even when it’s hard? #Anxiety #Shame #Barriers #struggles #Advice #TheMighty #MentalHealth #Anxiety #Depression #Support

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Any tips for accepting your Anxiety?

Sometimes I get nice breaks from anxiety and everything is smooth sailing ⛵️ but other times it comes back and is a constant nuisance wether it’s physical symptoms or just mental and that voice in my head trying to sabotage me. Any tips for when you find anxiety makes you feel dumb and silly for struggling with it? Sometimes it can be the smallest of things and it makes you feel shame vulnerable and stigma. #Anxiety #help #struggling #Support #ideas #coping #Shame #Stigma #mighty #TheMighty #MightyTogether

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Vent on fears, depression, shame #Fear #Depression #Shame #Cancer #HealthCare #money #Aging

Trying to sleep Friday night on the couch so I can cry. worried my body is failing and so is my cancer treatment. Muscles and joints are stiff. Feel like ive aged10 years in last 6 months. Tired, mentally and physically. If I keep going until AprilI am told I can retire with full medicl benefits. Supposedly. I do not trust HR or my retirement management group. I fear my job, medical plan,and health, all ending within the first 6 months of 2024

I am going to try and sleep.
Reading Howl's Moving Castle.
Identifying with the heroine Sophie, who was enchanted https://to.turn into an old woman.

Gnight

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