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#beach escape!

#Inside during the pandemic hasn't been bad. #Taking on line courses for fun, #establishing rituals, #embracing zen, all have helped in gaining #good medicine". But after a day of politely listening as others talk at me about fluff, feigning interest for hours, restraining to gasp at what i'm hearing---#Evening beach escape is heaven. Medically safe, no one nearby, peace, sound of the ocean, the day drifting away, the sunset. So worth a 30 minute drive!

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Embracing derealization.

The world and what is perceived as "real life" is but a dream. A waking dream. And I feel lucid most of the time within in. So much so that I have not been able to connect with others. It's like trying to talk to dream characters. I don't talk about these beliefs about the world with others. I go on like a normal human being would but I've noticed there's some unseen aversion towards me. Whether these people are conscious of it or not. I am not unpleasant, I am polite and considerate. But certain people just seem so resistant to being around me. They don't really just get up and leave but soon as I start speaking, I notice the defensiveness over their own personal beliefs. And we might not even be talking about their beliefs but it some how gets brought up. I feel as though they're afraid of seeing something that's actually real. Something that will trigger them awake too. The world around me constantly reminds me I'm dreaming. Especially when I start identifying with my pain, it's like something will occur and I'll stop and come back to the fact I'm dreaming. I still struggle a lot. I often feel alone and I kind of understand why but it still sucks. Does anyone else feel this??? 🤍
#Derealization #Dissociative #Anxiety #Fear #dreams #Dreaming #embracing #Life


Dear Emotion,

Dear Sadness,

I warmly welcome you - I will not blanket over you conceal nor run from you. I will be with you - so very gently like how the morning rests in dew. #nonduality #embracing #Being #alwaysarriving #CheckInWithMe