justsaying

My dad was talking on the phone with a cousin of mine. I think he was asking about me and just my breakdown. (mental health) issue. He said twice he didn't weant to talk of it. Well it's not something i want to talk about it. It's over and done with. I hate when people bring this up. It's okay not shating everything with everybody. Not everyone needs to know. Some people can only be nosy. #justsaying #Depression

I recently separated from my abusive husband and shortly afterwards I rekindled love with an old friend. It’s been peaceful and calming to be with someone who treats me well and seeing his love for me is more genuine... it’s captivating. I’m honestly terrified that my falling in love will fault and things will become like my last relationship. I was so comfortable in the pain that I never left, 10 years and 2 children I share with my ex... What if that comes to be the same way with this relationship.

My new partner and I have been best friends since we were kids, we met in first grade and though we never dated till now we messed around as teenagers. I wanted to be with him so badly back when we were teens but my conditions were worse, I could hardly think straight back then. It’s comforting to know that my feelings never faded but more so comforting to know that I am more in control of myself. He sees the more peaceful and at ease side of me, sometimes I feel like it’s fake though. I know the insecurities are partly due to my conditions but it scares me. I’m falling in love and yet I have doubts, I try to stay open and honest with him but sometimes the anxiety kicks me in the teeth and blinds me. It’s just difficult to stay positive after my life of negativity. My depression has been in remission and I’m worried if I keep second guessing myself that I may relapse. #thisworriesmealittle #hadtogetitoffmychest #justsaying #itfeelsright #feelingrightmakesmefeelwrong

My emotions fluctuate so much during the day, and whatever I feel...I feel INTENSELY.

Right now at this particular moment in time i hate myself.
I don't feel like I AM anything.
5 minutes ago I felt like I was going to implode.
5 minutes before than I felt like I was going to break down and cry so much that I may flood my house.
5 minutes before I felt so anxious I wanted to simply disappear .
5 minutes before that I felt so dirty I couldn't stop cleaning myself.
Over and over again.
5 minutes before that I felt so ugly, so vulnerable and so totally afraid.
5 minutes before that i felt completely naked.
I was fully clothed in my daily attire.
My Pajamas.
5 minutes before that i felt so utterly exhausted i couldn't keep my eyes open.

And right now
I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING.
NOTHING AT ALL.

And whatever I feel, I feel so intensely.

#CPTSD #BPD #GAD #MDD #OCD #CFS #BDD #PMDD #pissedoffendswithad #sodoessad #asdoesafraid #afraidofbeingabandoned .

Yours Truly
UndeaDanDUnweD.

#MightyTogether

I'm a suicide survivor. A worthy carefree, vulnerable and sensitive individual just like anyone here.

I just want to open up a part of me and what I know to help somebody.

See life is hostile, people are hostile. I'm saying this cus I'm seeing a lot of self-emphatic expressions on here that shouldn't be. You want healing - this is it;

Nobody will consider you, your pain, your struggle until you become something, and you'll be amazed that those same people who despised you, will look over and praise you.

So please, for the sake of your progress, your purpose ahead, for the sake of no one but your self - brace up, dust your pain off and move further cus greater's ahead.

No need to hover in despair - you'll self destruct and live defeated while the rest of the world moves on fine and well.

Society dims people like we, who are totally 'offbeat' and suffer a lot of inner pain - as irrelevant. Look I know what I'm saying - I've been trampled upon literally, I've been in relationships where those I thought I loved called me out as an outcast, as nobody, cus I was anxious, depressed - a social anomaly.

I've been called all sorts of names; unknown, indivisible, a shy introverted timid girl with no evident signal to surmount to anything.

But look, you can't live life based on mere heresay.

People have a right to opinion but they shouldn't have a right over your outcome.

I'll repeat, the world is really hostile. Everybody is out for their interest, their concerns and all. Nobody actually fully cares. And nobody can care for you as much as you can.

Give yourself the benefit of a relevantly significant living. And give no thought for a second to think that you are anything but worthless.

You are worthy and significant.
You are more than Mighty.

#justsaying
#MentalHealth
#Suicide
#Anxiety
#Depression
#introverts
#Healing
#TheMighty