Panic Attacks

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I wrote this poem when one of my best friends died. I really struggled after she was gone 😢

Kind lover, father's daughter
Loyal friend, caring mother

Someone as rare as you
Is like finding that one in a million
You might be gone
But you'll never be forgotten

The phone won't ring again
From you calling just because
No laughing uncontrollably
You were there when no one else was

We could talk for hours, you & me
The definition of what a best friend should be

Smiling as we reminisce about the good ol' days
You would want us to keep moving on
Laughing as we reminisce about your old ways
You would want us to keep having fun

We're all wishing this just wasn't true
Words can't explain what we're all going through
We're all feeling down, feeling blue
Words can't explain how much we miss & love you

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Journaling #Addiction #Depression #MentalHealth #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #SuicidalThoughts #SuicidalIdeation #Suicide #Selfharm #MightyPoets

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I wrote this poem when one of my best friends died. I really struggled after she was gone 😢

Kind lover, father's daughter
Loyal friend, caring mother

Someone as rare as you
Is like finding that one in a million
You might be gone
But you'll never be forgotten

The phone won't ring again
From you calling just because
No laughing uncontrollably
You were there when no one else was

We could talk for hours, you & me
The definition of what a best friend should be

Smiling as we reminisce about the good ol' days
You would want us to keep moving on
Laughing as we reminisce about your old ways
You would want us to keep having fun

We're all wishing this just wasn't true
Words can't explain what we're all going through
We're all feeling down, feeling blue
Words can't explain how much we miss & love you

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Journaling #Addiction #Depression #MentalHealth #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #SuicidalThoughts #SuicidalIdeation #Suicide #Selfharm #MightyPoets

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This poem is about one of my friends that died

Kind lover, father's daughter
Loyal friend, caring mother

Someone as rare as you
Is like finding that one in a million
You might be gone
But you'll never be forgotten

The phone won't ring again
From you calling just because
No laughing uncontrollably
You were there when no one else was

We could talk for hours, you & me
The definition of what a best friend should be

Smiling as we reminisce about the good ol' days
You would want us to keep moving on
Laughing as we reminisce about your old ways
You would want us to keep having fun

We're all wishing this just wasn't true
Words can't explain what we're all going through
We're all feeling down, feeling blue
Words can't explain how much we miss & love you

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Journaling #Addiction #MentalHealth #Depression #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #SuicidalIdeation #Suicide #SuicidalThoughts #Selfharm #MightyPoets

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This poem is about one of my friends that died

Kind lover, father's daughter
Loyal friend, caring mother

Someone as rare as you
Is like finding that one in a million
You might be gone
But you'll never be forgotten

The phone won't ring again
From you calling just because
No laughing uncontrollably
You were there when no one else was

We could talk for hours, you & me
The definition of what a best friend should be

Smiling as we reminisce about the good ol' days
You would want us to keep moving on
Laughing as we reminisce about your old ways
You would want us to keep having fun

We're all wishing this just wasn't true
Words can't explain what we're all going through
We're all feeling down, feeling blue
Words can't explain how much we miss & love you

#BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Journaling #Addiction #MentalHealth #Depression #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #SuicidalIdeation #Suicide #SuicidalThoughts #Selfharm #MightyPoets

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I did a thing and I survived... but only just.

I had a panic attack today. I ripped off the tips of my nails again. It wasn't like the last time I had a panic attack. But I decided to take a shower... and my dysphoria kicked my ass. I couldn't find my underwear. The pair I was wearing has a tendency to trigger my dysphoria. I needed my boy clothes. So my caregiver came in my room and helped me find them. Unfortunately the one she found makes me feel fat and ugly. She said I am still cute. That helps me feel loved. I haven't made dinner yet cuz I was struggling with my feelings after the shower. I really don't want to cook dinner but I have salmon in the fridge that needs to be cooked tonight. I've been grounded from cooking for 3 nights but not starting until tomorrow night. She knows I don't want to waste food.

#Anxiety #PanicAttacks #Depression #Caregiving

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My poem that I wrote

I don't know if this is something I can post but I just wanted to get it out there. Maybe someone else is feeling the same way.

Always loving
Now that's missing
Tossing
Turning

Everything's changing
Constantly regretting

I keep exploring
Don't know where I'm going
No way of seeing
No way of knowing

Quickly moving
I see me crashing

Emotions running
Sanity ungluing

Why am I living?
What am I doing?
Where am I traveling?
Who's even noticing?

No one's hearing
What I'm saying
So my yelling
Turns to screaming

---

Here I'm talking
Is anybody listening
No one's there caring
The pain is stinging

Time is ticking
Time is passing
I'm not playing
I'm not joking

What is happening?
Tears are flowing
Hard time breathing
Vision is fading

Body is numbing
Heart is crushing
Blood is pouring
I need reviving

I feel like I'm falling
But who's there catching?

Was that me jumping?
Or was I dreaming?

#SuicidalIdeation #Suicide #SuicidalThoughts #Selfharm #MightyPoets #BPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Agoraphobia #Anxiety #PanicAttacks #PanicDisorder #PanicAttack #Journaling #Addiction #MentalHealth

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