Hi I'm new here
I have been battling with depression and anxiety since I was 6years when I got sexually assaulted.it became worse when i got home Nd they will start making jokes about what happened to me.nd how selfish I was to tell that my uncle raped just because he had money it still hurts like it was yesterday. #Anxiety #Depression #sexuallyassaulted #rapevictim #healingjourney
#rapevictim # Some days I wake up and feel okay with myself others not so great. Many memories are repressed and some are at the surface. Some days I wish I could understand the why's of it all.
My boyfriend took my virginity when I told him I wasn’t ready. I allowed him to kiss me and touch me. I would always ask him not to penetrate as I was not ready for sex. The moment I found out I was no longer a virgin I got suicidal, I wanted to cut myself with a glass. He apologized and promised he’d never leave me. Every time I would talk to him about it I would cry. He said I was talking about it a lot as if I wanted someone else to break it. I was not ready. It’s been 3 years now and I always cringe at a mention of his name, it triggers me. I still get suicidal thinking about it.
Am I a rape victim? #Survivor of rape and or molestation #RapeSurvivors #rapeculture #rapevictim #Rape
wouldn’t it be nice to have a hotline for everything we face in regards to our illnesses and the unwanted pain that has been inflicted upon us. we didn’t ask for sickness, pain, confusion, rape, unhappy childhoods, or the many scars on our bodies or in our minds. I believe in a Higher Power because He/She/It is doing mighty healing works in my body, mind, and soul. I am so grateful that I am being shown Light in the Darkness. Everything that has been done in the DARKNESS WILL ONE DAY BE EXPOSED THE LIGHT. I’m believing/knowing that this, too, will one day help all of us. The work is tiring to get up and be healed but IT IS WORTH IT!
I've been struggling since being raped I searched for #rapevictim #DomesticAbuse #Abuse if there is one and I'm just blind let me know
I am now 25 years old. I rarely leave my room. In fact, I can barely get up out of my bed. I have been like this for about 10 years now. Since birth, my entire life has been a series of traumatic events. The only way I can deal with any of this is with heroin. People always say there is a rock bottom. Not for me. I learned when I was 19, there is no such thing as rock bottom, because when you think things cannot possibly get worse, for me they do. Everytime I think there is nothing that can traumatize me more than I already have been, something I never even thought of happening, happens. Most recently, I got necrotizing fasciitis in both of my legs from injecting. I was too scared to go to the doctors, so it got worse and worse until I was rushed to the hospital, and my legs were almost amputated. Luckily, my doctors saved them, but they are extremely deformed now. The perfect cherry on top of my hell.
Before that?
Dealing with my legs has been a cake walk. I spent 5 months in the hospital, I was off of heroin for the first time in 10 years, not by choice. And the pain medication they had me on,though a high dose, was not enough. So my every 3 day wound vaccuum changes were so excruciating, they would take 5 hours to take it off. Anyways, before my legs, I had an abortion I didn’t want when I was 22. And that was somehow worse than my second rape at the age of 19, which wasn’t as bad as the first time I was raped, the day my life ended, at the age of 16. Before the age of 16, I grew up in a constantly physically and mentally abusive household. Now these are just the main points of my life, I say that because I don’t know how to not make this post into a book. So I’m sorry if it’s too much for one post, I don’t know how this works.
I don’t really feel like explaining the terrible person that my father is, because I’m still under his hold, though not physically anymore, but the worst things he did are so complex, I don’t want to get into them at this moment, because that will need it’s own post. The only story I really want to fully tell in my first post, is that of my first rape, and how it effected me.
By the time I was 16, I had been smoking cigarettes for 5 years, smoking weed for about 2-3, and was becoming mildly addicted to hydrocodone. I was cutting myself at the age of 10, and had severe sleep issues around the same age, still do. Now at this point in my life, I obviously still had the will to live. I kept thinking I would be strong enough to pull myself out of my hell and rise out of the ashes. And maybe if New Year’s Eve never happened that year, I could have. But that was the day two men stole my soul and my sanity....
I will finish the story in another post, since this one only has a few characters left! #PTSD #Trauma #rapevictim #Addiction #dysfunctional #dissassociativedisorder #DepersonalizationDisorder #CPTSD #HeroinAddiction #MentalIllness #MeToo
I’m not sure the best hashtags to use to get my story out there.
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