I’m at the age In life where BIG beautiful exciting things are suppose to happen.
Internships , big moves , Babies . College degrees, marriages, dream jobs, first houses , first “bought it yourself car”
Big, beautiful , life changing things
I’m in a phase of my life .. where 99% of the time a big life change means a health flare .. or health decrease . 😂😬🤦🏼♀️.
Or new medical equipment.. or perscription to help me with that flare or decrease 😂😅
And sometimes.. sometimes embarrassingly Enough.
I’ll scroll through social media world .. see these big beautiful life changing things.
And I’ll feel like I want to act like a defiant toddler . Kick and scream and yell .. “. It’s MY turn now... when will it be MY turn!”
( awful right )
I’m so happy that the people I love are getting these big beautiful life changing things.
But sometimes.. I feel like. .. once .. just once ... I’d like a “ life change “
that is big and beautiful.. not my typical .. sad .. and health / dream destroying .
But the other day .. as the big green monster of envy began to wrap its arms around me . I had to go back to a trick I learned way back when everyone was applying for college.
And I was scribbling funeral plans in a notebook. As my body slowly starved to death from an undiagnosable illness (. Which ended up being connective tissue disease caused Gastroparesis)
I had to take a deep breath and say .
“My day will come . “
And I belief it to be true.
Some days I litterally feel like I was just put on this earth to “ suffer well “
But I FIRMLY do believe that God does bless us all with “ Beautiful life changing things “ eventually .
And when that day comes .
to put it short.
I hope the ones I love will Be as excited with my successes
With the amount of power, enthusiasm , and love that they used to supportive through my trails
So if you have felt the way I do .
And you just feel like EVERYONE is getting “ big beautiful life changing things”
But you .
My only advice is .
Be incredibly stoked for the success of others .
Fawn over baby clothes
Drool over home decor
Help a friend study
Send a good luck gift for that all to important interview
Look at home after possible home that they show you online . .
( Even if you feel like your eyes are going to bleed If you stare at one more floor plan. )
Make the candy lei for the graduation.
Be the “hype friend “ during wedding planning .
Be the friend you would want to have .
Because if nothing else ..
Your day will come
#smileon🐷 #chronicillness #spoonie #lifethoughts #treatotherasyouwouldliketobetreated #chronicpain #yourdaywillcome #youngadult