My Hope's are once again dashed. Fobbed off with, "there's really no need to diagnose you, let's just work through your thoughts". Hmm well that's what I've been spending thousands of £ and hours doing for the last 4 years and I'm still no further forward so no thanks! Don't get me wrong, I try but it doesn't go anywhere, I don't want to be rude so I plod on agreeing and complying. Until I reach this point where I'm so angry I want to scream and say please someone just listen to me!! I'm not ok! I feel so different to everyone else, I struggle to relate, to bond, to connect, it's all just surface level to appear "normal". It's empty and awful, people wall away, people avoid me as they don't understand me and I am left here with a sense of shame, like I'm a bad person when in fact I'd never intentionally hurt someone and you don't realise I keep you at arms length for your own good. Because I don't know how to connect, to open up, to be who you need me to be.
Another let down of avoiding diagnosing me and professionals telling me how I feel because I'm articulate, look normal and appear to function.
#Diagnosis #MentalHealth #lonely #Shame #mentalhealthservices #alienation #herewegoagain