avm

I realized why some believed my issues were all mental health. Funny, once you, hear the https://narrative.From some, a https://breakdown.A complete https://break.Oh no she did something, it caught up to her.
😆 🤣 Nope, it turned into one, over the past two years though. Here is the real https://reason.My AVM.This, is why I am https://grateful.This is why I cry, fight, fly and https://fawn.This little ball of veins with enough pressure to https://blow.But instead, it bleeds microtiny little scratches through my sleeves if the veins, https://SAH.On top of no treatment, no medication absorption and a few other mutations, that give me https://trouble.No arguementative cycles or disregulations.
That was all https://reactive.But this is the reason, 5 years https://ago.And every day,week, month year, I am https://grateful.Never question someones health struggles, it could, happen to https://you.Never dismissed someones struggles and situation.Ecspecially, if you heard it third https://party.I am aware and https://good.Take care, because Im taking care of https://mine.Stay in your lane, be kind and be grateful to have life.

I thought if I was transparent,others would https://follow.I believed it for https://years.I would smile, be forthcoming and it would be reciprocal,just https://enough.Did I know my vulnerabilities would be turned as weapons, no.am I surprised, now that the players are exposed, not one bit surprised.
Women, who coddle grown men and give excuses for men, who belittle, dismiss and undermine, other women, are the https://problem.They joke, make light, pander to the one who, doesnt care, shows zero concern and turns prideful when https://questioned.But he doesn't hit her, so prop him up and pat him on the head..I am so tired of these excuses, from women.Atleast, he didnt hit you? DID YOU REALLY SAY THAT!Four women, so https://far.I should have been grateful, they are https://saying.The bar is, to not be hit and I should be grateful.Nope, I deserve better.it could be worse so I better appreciate what I https://have.Excuse me.No, he needs to appreciate what he https://had.He needs to be happy we held him up, plated the role he wanted, for his https://comfort.The audacity to portray something you never, tried to https://grow.No effort, all forced and instructed, to get it done.
Something I have begged for, curtesy and https://inclusion.To turn and portray, my lowest point in my life, as a catapult to https://leave.That is not my cross to https://carry.I have not worked this hard and long, in my life to be called, lazy, attention seeking😄, golddigger,thats funny,a cunt(family favorite for them)a bitch, a nag, a whore, controlling(another funny one) and messy, my https://favorite.All said by the women, in his life. I cant imagine why a woman, wouldnt want that environment? Really ladies, wise up, try teaching men how, to speak to a woman,behind their backs as well as to their https://face.Try encouragement or honesty,stop plotting revenge to save face for tea time, try telling them, they are wrong for treating their spouses like an option, a burden and maybe, NOT decide to phase them out with gossip and https://slander.Be a man, speak for yourself and stop playing BOTH SIDES.
The women around your husband, should support the wife, not insult them, stalk them, gossip and trade stories, to isolate https://them.But I now know.Amazing,the charm is thick but he sure had enough of them on the sidelines, waiting.Funny, all rallied around pretty quick, for never being involved https://before.And how not one ever came to me, sad bunch.Huh, isnt life funny when the curtain gets pulled https://back.I wasn't wrong and that really bothers people, sorry.

Have a good https://life.Have fun with all the new blossoming friendships, you both have https://aquired.Everyone knows, true friendships are in large numbers, https://right.The more you've accumulated, the greater the substance of those https://relationships.All thick as https://theives.I missed out, on that in https://life.I am https://aware.And tell8ng me its All my fault, is telling where it is coming from.
I was thrown out, too much, pushed aside, ignored.So, I removed https://myself.Easy.I do not chase or pander to group egos, for social clout or https://standing.I dont try to fit in or want to fit https://in.I understand why Im considered difficult from a family of https://narcissists.Clear as day now.you couldnt be honest with me but expected me to be, the entire https://relationship.You kept women in the sidelines, just in https://case.I had a friend, take advantage of me and you https://laughed.I wasn't defended by you or yours, you piled https://on.The exact way I was mistreated, by entire life, you and your family https://did.You took my hurt and weaponized https://it.And now you want me to be nice, fair and quiet? Seriously? How? I will continue to express by https://writing.If it bothers you and yours, dont read https://it.Or better yet. Stop.

Im afraid my strength is going to be my largest https://hurdle.Every hurt, physically does damage and the days recovering sucks,pressure and https://vertigo.Exhaustion is part of the process, but its too much on my https://body.And I forget prior, a complete https://blank.I regret it everytime and then feel like I ran a https://marathon.I almost passed out yesterday, from the heartache of the https://kitten.I cant even call to https://check.I can breath and prioritize me, all I can https://do.I cant stand being mean, aweful and https://ugly.Ive let it takeover in a way I never saw coming. Letting yourself feel it, really https://hurts.Its not this pretty healing journey, it hurts, constantly,physically and https://emotionally.When your family disregards your pain, your confusion and reality, thats https://it.Theres what left?

Someone feeling they have the right to sabotage and orchestrate your life for the better, without your participation, is controlling munipulation 101.to dig up information, stalk, harrass, mock, stage and pretend it is Out of concern, is another level of https://abuse.Calling out abuse can become https://abuse.I will not participate and https://partake.Setting a woman up to teach her a lesson, is abusive.
Any women, taking part, are as enabling, as the https://man.I said it.Sorry.
Keep your old school, mobster mentality, out of my https://life.The personal attacks towards my life, judgements by people, who never were part, is https://comical.Im no fool, I https://knew.I have years of abuse, trauma, from many people, my life circumstances and life choices,that have brought me through. Not from,these individuals,being emotionally supportive.
Im not coddled, pampered or given the princess treatment, like most have been led to believe, never https://was.The bare minimum,is no longer,acceptable.I let it be for https://years.When I asked for more, I was met with a https://fight.I have become a broken https://record.I am smashing the record.to expect a woman to be soft,sweet,nurturing after disrespecting her publicly,is Delussional.But, I do see where, all involved, see nothing wrong with it.
Projection is https://funny.I catch myself https://constantly.I observe too much behavior, its a peculiar https://thing.Ive done it my entire https://life.I forget that a majority of them, are so trauma bonded, that no one will, not, be judged, when that door, for real connection, is https://opened.I did show https://up.He did not want me to.
Acceptance and intimacy, in relationships, shouldn't https://judge.Good and bad, are you serious? Im Bad? OK.
I wear my flaws, I'll tell you my failures but not everyone is willing to do https://that.I can't be around people who do that.it is automatic,a closed mindedness to human https://behavior.Your problem with me, is You, not https://me.Mean girl https://mentality.Band of brothers https://bullshit.Say I just dont know friends, then.No, I do not, I have had to reevaluate the entire https://structure.I bonded with people through https://survival.Anyone from my https://teens.They do not know me, they know,of, https://me.Epic 😆 🤣 😂.Im actually quite lame.

Heres a few,How could she? Who does she, think she is?Well, I'd https://never.Try this instead.

She should.
She knows, who she is.
She deserves better.
She doesnt want things, she wants things consistant, completed and she wants to https://grow.That is not control, it is safety.

This is for all my watchers and readers, now that I know I have https://them.Thank you for the last two days, the universe has a way of settling the score on its own, in ways, most of you havent learned yet.
I had a moment to reverse and turn back, when a kitty was ran over, on https://purpose.Then darted back into the https://road.A sicko hit her, ten feet from me.no one would https://stop.I scooped her up and flew to the https://vet.She was white and tan calico, fluffy tail long hair, maybe four months https://old.Beautiful https://kitty.She was unconscious in my arms then came to, she was in https://shock.I was in https://shock.They put me in a seperate room and worked on https://her.It felt like https://forever.I felt it ALL, five years of fear,loss and https://regret.Because a stranger kitty is hurt, bad.
All the betrayal, the lies the congames and orchestrated https://munipulation.All of https://it.The snears and gossiping about my life and my https://heartaches.What is wrong with people? Not once,has anyone ever spoken to me, only ABOUT https://me.Not to me,with me, but about me.Ick.

And Im sitting here worrying about a helpless animal, that was hit by a truck, on purpose, in front of https://me.Did I turn a blind eye and say, she did it to herself, her own fault.no I picked her up, held her, cried with her, told her I got you, youre ok, youre safe, Im https://here.I didnt have to think about it, discuss it with others or decide if its worth the effort trying to help https://her.I didnt run away,hide, or freeze, I picked her up and held her, https://immediately.Not a second thought.
After the vets got her iv'd and sedated they let me go https://back.They were patient, reassuring but brutally honest about whats next and what will, could https://happen.Communication.They weren't cold, hard, cocky and defensive towards https://me.They had compassion, concern and https://empathy.They had no reason to judge my tears, concern and state, they understood, my feelings were valid.
They listened, wanted to know what happened to her, in https://detail.They didnt ask the guy, who drove by staring and judging the lady in the middle of the road screaming.
I honestly didnt think I'd be okay https://yesterday.And I was more than ok. And only because I had to face another clown,another flying monkey, trying to teach me another orchestrated lesson, immediately after. A real one,was handed to me on a silver platter, that served me more than anything, any of you, can come up https://with.Stay in your own https://lane.Im not being quiet.