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Testy Chapter

This time it’s been rough! Easiest way to put it. So now our good old pal lupus has decided to attack my bladder and it has been a spiral of craziness. It’s been 4 months since we have started treating the Lupus Cystitis with Chemo and higher doses of Prednisone 🥵 and it is takin a toll on me mentally and physically. I feel like the doctors are just kinda blindly treating me due to never actually treating a patient with it. MY BLADDER HURTS, STINGS,BURN, and ACHES all day long even more when going. After seeing how bad my bladder is they were gonna do a biopsy but decided it to big of a risk with it being so fragile so no biopsy but we do know it’s extremely inflamed and causing lots of pain on top of other things. I’ve had two hospital stays in back to back months a week and the other a week an a couple of days trying to control pain. Moon face is real( see above pic) I’ve gained so much weight and it’s only making things in life more hard then usual but it’s time to pull up my big girl undies and do what I gotta do #Lupus #warrior #LupusWarriors #sickandtired #CVID #LUPUSCycstits #tired #GottaKeepOnMovin #ItsOkNotToBeOk #HBP #SystemicLupusErythematosus #KidneyDisease #GERD #Fibromyalgia #Asthma #RaynaudsPhenomenon #BloodClots #ChronicBloodClots

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U.S. Registered Emotional Support Animal #BloodClots #MentalHealth #supportanimal #PTSDSupportAndRecovery

Meet Wilson, he is a 12.5 pound Shih Tzu Pekingese mix rescue. Wilson is very well trained, he does not use the restroom inside, he is not a yappy dog that barks like crazy. Wilson has NEVER bitten anyone and LOVES other animals. Wilson is a HUGE part of my life.
I am a 37 year old female who has had a very serious and emotional medical situation this past year. Due to having an ablation done to my heart I developed blood clots that went to my lungs. Thankfully they did not end my life as they have for so many others. This past year my life has changed to the point that it is unrecognizable. I was at the top of my career,full of life and full of energy. I am now using my LTD , have therapy every week and most days I have to talk myself through each breath I take. I am proud to say that I have made progress and that I am not finished... I am not finished living and I am not finished trying.The anxiety that I feel and that keeps me from sleeping at night is not gone and I have long admitted that I needed help and that I could not get past this alone. I receive medical care for not only my physical health but my mental health as well. I will wholeheartedly be honest when I admit that until this situation came about in my life I never fully understand the magnitude of how important mental health is and how little society seems to understand illness if they can not “see” what the illness is. I go to therapy each and ever week. I do the exercises that I am advised to do, I take the medication I am prescribed to take. I DO the work and NO it is NOT easy! Things that used to be so simple are not simple anymore. If my goal for the week is to physically SIT (yes something as simple as sitting) to sit and watch a movie with my family and not to get up more than twice for any longer than 10 minutes then I try SO very hard to do this. Sitting? Sitting is so difficult because if you read about blood clots they can be caused by lack of movement. Logically my mind tells me that just to sit and watch a movie which I’ve done a million times in the past (pre clot) that I will not get a Blood Clot, but my mind does not allow logical on so many things anymore. Again I do the work because I WANT to get better. I WANT to work again and I’d absolutely love to watch a movie without standing for half of it. This is only one example of the “hard”.
I will wrap this up... my next exercise is to ride in a vehicle on a vacation with my family. This sounds easy right? Wrong! A trip... a vacation... getting away... this is no longer enjoyable but instead it is work! In the beginning I first mentioned Wilson, he is my registered emotional support animal who I truly need with me and when I called to ask about him coming the hotel informed me that they only allow pets that help the owner if they are “blind”, or have “something physical “ wrong. It seems that once again the illness that can not be seen is not recognized. When will this change?