Was a great husband. Dedicated and lovong dad. This I know. Generally try and be the best person I can be each and every day. It takes effort, intention and work. Living with weight of BPD I've learned to simply stay in the light by being the light. It keeps the struggles manageable after my journey, and keeps me focused on my number one priority of being a dad.
Learning to date again. Learning to trust again. Learning and hoping to love again someday.
Spent 20 years with someone. 6 months after she found out I had BPD, she was gone. About a year later, I tried again and fell hard, she did as well. Everything was great, until I told her I had BPD. She was gone pretty quick thereafter. Dated casually since, but whenever it gets real and we start speaking truth... in that moment of vulnerability, I let them know that I have BPD. It's clear when I connect with a gal we always fall hard fast, but once they found out about the BPD within a week they're usually gone. I thought it might have been something I was doing or saying but realized that it truly is linked with that piece of info. Patterns are hard to ignore with repeated experience now.
When is the right time to disclose that little nugget, or is that something that just stays locked away forever in a relationship if I hope to bond and love again?