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Don't understand why #Borderlinerelationships #BPD #Breakups

Ok so I decided to start a little book of memories of us that bring me joy, quotes and poems so if it pops into her head while thinking lowly of herself she can open it to any page for either a poems, inspiration or what joy she brought to me by just being her.

So far I've written the description/explanation of what it is and why I did it but whenever I go to start the bulk pages "BOOM" like a tone of bricks heart palpitations , short sharp breathing and anxiety through the roof and I have no clue why I was also getting them in bed this morning.

Any thoughts would be helpful.


A hard day #Breakups #Borderlinerelationships #loveherstill

Well today the reason my heart beats and I broke up. I'm rather calm considering and it was extremely civil as far as breakups go. One part of it I found to be rather painful and not for reasons you would think.
Among the paragraphs back and forth to each other in one she apologised because she thinks all she has done is hurt me and by no means was it all flowers and butterflies.
So I've decided to make a book for for when she feels down just with a mixture of inspirational quotes/reminders to love herself even just a little bit more, some uplifting poems and a heap of detailed memories when she made me feel not only love but made me want to be a better man that's worthy of a love so pure

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Wits end

My girl hasn't wanted to see me in 5 weeks we only see each other weekends and every weekend I get my hopes up just for her to not want to. It's like a child 5 weeks in a row running to the Christmas tree just to find no presents. Lol.
I love her so much but everytime this happens I despise myself for thinking she would want to see me.
Via message we still chat a bit she still tells me she loves me but my thoughts keep going to dark places and I'm not sure how much more I can take.
Any input would be greatly appreciated #Borderlinerelationships


Another post about my navigation and struggle. As always constructive input always welcome #Borderlinerelationships #outofmyhead

Ok so I'm unsure of so much the only sure thing I know is I love her and am proud of her.

So she quit amphetamines a month ago after a decade of abuse that's the reason for my pride but we haven't seen each other in this time either. We pretty much text every day but the texts are starting to seem hollow or generic as if pre-recorded lol. She says she isn't sleeping well and is always tired due to withdrawals which I do understand I am trying to be as supportive as possible but it's hard when we live an hour apart and I'm lucky to get a response within 90 mins from her.

I have undiagnosed mental issues of my own that I am seeing a therapist about. heaps of trust and emotional suppression for 15-20 years as a survival tool for my life style/choices

Every week when I get excited to spend time with her only to be disappointed when she doesn't want me around. I find myself hating me and starting to believe I had it right for all those years.
I've always prepared for the worst and dulled my emotions accordingly while hoping for the best or just did pre-emptive strike with close to zero emotional attachment depending on the situation
my mind is drifting to thoughts of her using me even if this was the case I constantly keep asking if I can help with money among other things. if this was true I wouldn't care because I offer and I do it so the woman I love and adore doesn't have to struggle so much however it would be the deceit that'd devour me.
Also thoughts of her cheating on me physically or emotionally plague the back of my mind even though she hasn't really given me a reason to have these thoughts other than not wanting me around and a series of unfortunate events earlier in the relationship.

Before she came back into my life I didn't think I was able to love a woman as much as I do her and I definitely wouldn't allow it just so I couldn't get hurt.
Because of this I'm starting to fall into old habits of preparation of my emotions, thoughts of sabotage and possibly straight up telling her i love her so much and to contact me If and or when she wants and has time for a relationship with me.
I constantly have to keep checking myself because I don't want any of these things to happen however I don't know how much more I can take before I snap and the old me just takes control and ruins it

And as always I forget what I was writing and apologise for how incoherent and all over the place my writing is

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Please help me find therapeutic help for my BPD in Salt Lake City Utah

I’m really in need of a therapist in the Salt Lake City, Utah USA area.

I haven’t had any psych help since I moved across the country alone 2 years ago and I’m realizing that I’m in desperate need of assistance in my healing my deeper, more “subtle” issues.

Any recommendations would be so greatly appreciated ❤️ PS I’m agnostic, so ideally not looking for a provider that focuses on god/religion. Pic for attention - my cutie who helps keeps me emotionally grounded.

#Borderlinerelationships #BorderlineStigma #BORDERLINEPROBLEMS #BPDDiagnosis #bpdsymptoms #Bpdisexhausting #BPDStigma

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Experience with relationship/ couples therapy and #BPD ? #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder #Borderlinerelationships

Hey to everyone 👋🏼

My #BPD loved one and I decided to begin a couples therapy. He breaks up with me in February, but we are still in contact and want to try to have a balanced and romantic relationship again.
In 2 weeks we have our first interview…🍀
I decided this way because we are struggling with a “closeness and distance” theme and I have no idea how we or I can deal with it. ☹️
My loved one is reflected, knows about his strugglings and agreed to this therapy. 💝

So my question:
Has anybody of you experience with a couple therapy? ☺️

Thank you for reading & lots of hugs 🤗💝

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#Borderlinerelationships #pushingpeopleaway

Hey Mightys,

today I was struggling and crying so hard.
I’ve met my #bpd loved one yesterday and suddenly he told me that he had no longing for me - he loves me, but he doesn’t feel anything, if he holds my hands.
I was just listening while he was talking. I thought it was his pattern. “He pushes me away”, but yesterday it was so hurtful 😫
He told me that he had a huge desire but not for me. Its like he’s searching for something but it’s also paradox: he wishes body contact, but if I’m holding his hand he cannot deal with it and wants to end the situation.
At the first time I have no idea what I can do.
I’m afraid of losing him. 😔

Looking forward for some advise.

Thanks for reading.

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Falling in deep... Until shit gets real #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder

Was a great husband. Dedicated and lovong dad. This I know. Generally try and be the best person I can be each and every day. It takes effort, intention and work. Living with weight of BPD I've learned to simply stay in the light by being the light. It keeps the struggles manageable after my journey, and keeps me focused on my number one priority of being a dad.


Learning to date again. Learning to trust again. Learning and hoping to love again someday.

Spent 20 years with someone. 6 months after she found out I had BPD, she was gone. About a year later, I tried again and fell hard, she did as well. Everything was great, until I told her I had BPD. She was gone pretty quick thereafter. Dated casually since, but whenever it gets real and we start speaking truth... in that moment of vulnerability, I let them know that I have BPD. It's clear when I connect with a gal we always fall hard fast, but once they found out about the BPD within a week they're usually gone. I thought it might have been something I was doing or saying but realized that it truly is linked with that piece of info. Patterns are hard to ignore with repeated experience now.

When is the right time to disclose that little nugget, or is that something that just stays locked away forever in a relationship if I hope to bond and love again?

#Relationships #Borderlinerelationships

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I want to be supportive for my #BorderlinePersonalityDisorder loved one. But how? #Borderlinerelationships

Hello community,

I’m Cosy and I’m struggling with a #BPD relationship. My loved one was diagnosed with bpd nearly 20 years ago. After the diagnostic he was for 6 month in-patient stay therapy where he learned different skills from #dbt. He is very reflected and controlled, but tow month ago he broke up with me, because he was triggered. 😞
He said, that he didn’t know who he is and that’s difficult for him to accept love.
While our relationship, he also started a new therapy again... after 18 years.
Now we are still in contact. It was his wish to stay in touch. He asked if we could call once a week and i agreed. Currently we call 2-3 times a week and meet every 2 weeks for 1-2 hours for a walk. 🙏🏼
I want to be supportive and give him his space. I’m not judging and listening. I love him with my full heart and hope we can make it. He’s worth it. 🥰

But of course, sometimes the situation is energy-sapping for me. 😕 I’m missing him so deeply and from time to time I’m very sad, overwhelmed and exhausted. 🥺
Sometimes I don’t know what to do or how I can help or support him. 😩

Does someone have any advice for me? What can I do or what’s helpful for him?
I will leave nothing untried. He’s my man.

Thank you for reading.
Stay safe! 🙏🏼🌷