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I suck

Not sure where to start been looking into councillors and psychologists and contacting them etc but does anyone have that poor of mental health where they think they are beyond help?

I’m on 40mg of citalopram a day and they help compared to not being on them, but it don’t cure what’s deep inside. The misery I’ve felt daily for 19 years that’s been patched up with pills.

Of course going to try with the support, but for a very long time 19 years exactly I have been stuck with these feelings of anxiety, depression, paranoia, HSP and low self esteem also fuelled by current and past trauma with bad relationships, some family and old friends. So it would be nice to hear others experiences to or expert advice. I’ve only ever seen a councillor once at the age of 17 and that was an unpleasant experience now 32.

I suppose opening up these thoughts today also gets me down then I’m thinking I really do suck.

Any psychologists on here let me know :-) I may even be able to help if someone has an issue with something to.

#deppression #Depression #Anxiety #MajorDepressiveDisorder #HSP #empathic #ParanoidPersonalityDisorder #Trauma #MajorDepressiveDisorder #HighlySensitive

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Let Me Tell You About The Freedom!

Since escaping from my abuser, my life is now my own.

Let me tell you about the freedom.

Maybe it will encourage you. Maybe it will inspire you escape from your own abuser.


I eat whatever I want now.

I eat all kinds of interesting and delicious things. No longer do I need to worry about what my "partner" thinks. What another person wants. The things they like, but I don’t. The things I like, but they don’t. My cupboard and refrigerator is now filled with things he would never recognize. Delicious things! Things I don’t need anyone else’s approval, to eat and enjoy.

No one looks down on me for what I eat. If I want to get junk, I eat junk. When I want to eat roasted vegetables, I eat roasted vegetables. There is no one here to judge me for it, or use it as a reason to feel superior to me. I find that my body tells me when it’s had enough.

Also, I can afford to eat whatever I want, because I’m not feeding anyone else but myself anymore. My abuser was a master exploiter, so I was always paying for his food in addition to my own. What are you supposed to do, eat in front of them when they can’t/won’t pay for food? Of course not, you’re going to share your food and feed them. Unless you’re an ogre.

Now I can eat out at moderately priced restaurants occasionally, because I’m not paying for another person. Very enjoyable. That’s big.

There’s more descriptions of my Freedom coming up!

Stay tuned for my next post where I’ll elaborate!

❤️ Love,
Lynn Felicia

#CPTSD #DomesticAbuseSurvivors #Narcissiticabuse #freedom #startingover #liberation #Recovery #empathic


How do you hold on to hope? #Depresion #Anxiety #Fibromyalgia #ChronicPain #ChronicFatigue #empathic

Hi. Honestly some days it's hard to hold onto hope. I get overwhelmed by life, pain and fatigue. I'm a wife and a mum of two adult at home children. I feel like a failure. I'm a Christian and I do believe that one day I will be whole but that feels like a long way away. I try to do things to improve my life but it's hard. I feel shame because I let people down. How do you hold onto hope?