I'm back home from a dentist's appointment. Guess how it was for me? Pure survival mode. My body turned on all the reflexes that were possible....
I often hear people talk about anxiety when it comes to dentist's appt.
For #HSP people wìth #CPTSD (and others) it's pure stress. That's nothing we can think our way out of.
The decission is on us whether we face the stress for physical health....
Anyway, I made it.
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I have not posted in awhile. I first started posting approx 7 years ago. I have been currently awake since 4 am’ish. I am back on another fundamental learning curve. I only found out in June 2024 that I have ADHD. Only finally secured a decent therapist a month ago. I can finally because I have benefits for the 1st time in 20 years. She supports my suspicion I am AuADHD. Only about up to 15 years ago the theory was no one could have both. On top of that one can be also born with a heightened sensitive nervous system. Elaine Aron’s research on the highly sensitive person survivor trait (HSP) has merit as well. A person can have a combination of all 3 of these processing styles. Again not disorders. There are way too many extremely ignorant mental health professionals who have no training or understanding of anything outside of the DSM.
I am so angry and resentful. I have had to learn in my 50’s things that the innate processing styles I was born with are not disorders. I also suffer from being raised by 2 emotionally immature parents. I am not supposed to say narcissists. Only others who were raised by narcissists gets that. Your whole perspective and lived experiences are gaslit and your consistently get scapegoated from birth. That screws up a person right from the start and it get miss and/or dismissed as no big deal. It’s the opposite. Just because I was not hit or experienced other hurricane physical abuses my trauma was missed and ignored until I was 52. I learned more in the last 5 years than the previous 52 years.
Things came to another crisis in Feb that caused me to go on medical leave (STD) and I am currently applying for long term disability. I have full validation I am experiencing another processing burnout. All these years I was made to feel I was so fundamentally flawed and that was why I keep having what I thought were breakdowns. In truth I now know I was experiencing AuADHD burnouts. My mind is running 24\7. So of course I would get overwhelmed and overstimulated very easily.
So now I see myself born with a heightened and sensitive nervous system. My brain processes things in neurodivergent ways. I was raised by emotional immature parents and that caused me to have a an ambivalent, disorganized insecure attachment style. I have been suffering from CPTSD from birth. So the idiot and I will stand by calling the psychiatrist who in 2013 diagnosed me with bipolar in one 45 minute session. He was an idiot who had no trauma training. Or any other understanding of anything outside the DSM. Had me on the wrong medications and would not listen to me when I knew I was not reacting well to the meds. My systems is sensitive to many meds and I do not have the “typical” responses that are expected. Plus when on social assistance they automatically give you the generic version of a med. I do not trust generics. They are cheaper for a reason you will never convince me they are the same as brand. Pharmaceutical companies are lying.
It as taken me over 10 years to start the healing on all the wrong professional supports I have had to experience. At 57 I feel I finally understand what I am dealing with. It still comes with a long list of its own challenges. Hence the latest learn curve includes a full physical and mental burnout. #c -PTSD #PTSD #MajorDepressiveDisorder #Dysthymia #Anxiety
This article also validates the added difficulties of late neurodivergent diagnosis. Nicola Knobel is a very helpful with many practical resources.
Forgot can't upload YouTube links.
Google Nicola Knoble: burnout in late diagnosed women, clinical insight, lived experience and what actually helps.
AuDHD Burnout in Late Diagnosed Women: Clinical Insights, Li...
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I was thrilled to watch the trailer of the series ‘Perfect Family- Therapy ka Safar’ on YouTube, Pay-Model: This is a pay-per-view model — first 2 episodes are free, and to watch the rest you need to pay and watch rest of the series. Releasing on 27 th November 2025. I hope it has captions in English, so that people who know English can also enjoy watching the series. I am glad and also hope Hindi audience also will get to know who HSP’s are, and how they deal with their sensitive and how they live in their respective families positive or negative environment. I feel The debutant producer of the series may be an HSP, as I am his fan too and follow his interviews. Watching his interviews, I felt that he is very emotional, soft spoken person, creative, his way of thinking nd gratitude towards others resembles an HSP. It’s just my opinion about debutant producer Pankaj Tripathi. I hope series, movies etc on HSP ‘s are made and spread the knowledge about this personality, so that everyone knows who HSP’s are in this world. I wish non HSP’s understand, accept our sensitive nature, treat us kindly and make our lives easier to live on this planet. #HSP #Highly sensitive personality.
I was thrilled to watch the trailer of the series perfect Family- therapy ka Safar on YouTube Pay-Model: This is a pay-per-view model on YouTube — first 2 episodes are free, and to watch the rest you need to pay and watch rest of the series. Releasing on 27 th November 2025. I hope it has captions in English, so that people who know English can also enjoy watching the series. I am glad and also hope Hindi audience also will get to know what HSP’s are, and how they deal with their sensitive and how they live in their respective families positive or negative environment. I feel The debutant producer of the series may be an HSP, as I am his fan too and follow his interviews. I felt that he is very emotional, soft spoken person, creative, his way of thinking nd gratitude towards others resembles an HSP. It’s just my opinion about debutant producer Pankaj Tripathi. I hope series, movies etc are made and spread the knowledge about this personality so that everyone knows who HSP’s are in this world and I wish they understand, accept our sensitive nature, treat us kindly and make our lives easier to live on this planet .
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My mind is all over the place this morning.
As I slowly wake up, anxiety creeps its way in. This emotion is primarily in my chest, from deep to superficial, radiating out to my shoulders. In my chest feels like a tightly wound, quick spinning (like tires down a highway), slightly nauseous, physical jitter, from the tops of my shoulders to the xiphoid process. This vibrating sum of sensations intensifies when I immerse myself in recalled memories or imagined future.
Where is this coming from?
Is it mom anxiety? (Child’s emotions and safety, overlap / gaps in schedules, (need to make) appointments, locations, meals, cleanliness..)
Is it wife anxiety? (Uncomfortable disagreement last night, opposite schedule for a few days - no time to reconnect, trying to support and meet my husband’s needs to the best of my ability, house/farm work, finances..)
Is it work anxiety? (Returning to work after three days off, protocols and procedures at work, patient healthcare, working 12 hours with leg pain from recent prior ankle injury..)
Is it a twisted combination of the three, urging me to run in every direction for the sake of movement?
Or is it something else, something hiding under the cover of fog and twilight?
Something as deeply hidden as my face has been behind this mask.
I think to myself, “I will be efficient, reliable and avoid mistakes while not being too noticeable for being odd, not calling attention to my own needs and ignoring my acknowledgment of those needs.” This is not healthy and borderline impossible to uphold, but I can’t not abide by this.
If I could give myself a motto, it would be “under the radar”.
For now, I’m noticing some moderate residual nausea felt in the epigastric region. My more constant daily pains are more noticeable again since my anxiety is at low tide for the time being.
I have this strange feeling of “I know what I need to be doing - those things are important and I feel urgency to get those things done but I just don’t want to. I can’t make myself. I literally feel myself getting tired, and my eyelids are getting heavy, but I can’t do the task”.
My mind just won’t shut off or even slow down for a second like please, sir, with extra mustard, I am not having a good time, I would like to get off this ride. 🎢🫠
Thanks for reading. 🌷
m_oy
#Anxiety #Depression #MentalHealth #AutismSpectrumDisorder #ADHD #HSP
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"Because I am an empath, I see what you can't admit and I sense what you try to bury. I am the mirror you didn’t ask for, the one you can’t escape. You can try to hide your feelings, your intentions, your shadows—honey, I see them all. Your mask is cute, but it’s paper-thin to me. You can’t outsmart the energy that you radiate, and you can’t outrun the reflection I hold up for you.
Here’s the thing you need to know about empaths: We don’t just “feel a little more.” No, we absorb, digest, and inhabit the energy that pours out of you, whether you know it’s leaking or not. Your anxiety? Tastes bitter on my tongue. Your envy? Burns like a shot of cheap whiskey down my throat. Your unspoken heartbreak, your simmering rage, your secret shame—I pick up the scent and wear it like a second skin. I feel it all. I hold it all.
But don’t get it twisted. I am not your emotional dumping ground. I am not here for you to unload your garbage and walk away lighter while I stagger under the weight. No, darling. I’m the wild alchemist. I take in your energy, and I transform it. Sometimes I’ll carry it, but sometimes, when the moon is right and my spirit is on fire, I’ll send it right back to you—gift-wrapped in truth and unapologetic clarity.
You want to know why you feel uneasy around me? Why you get defensive, prickly, or even hostile in my presence? It’s not because I’m rude, or too much, or too intense. It’s because your inner world is showing up on the big screen—the one I hold up, bigger than life, for you to see. You feel exposed, vulnerable, naked. But that’s not my fault. That’s your own authenticity trying to claw its way out.
If you have traits you hate about yourself—the ones you stuff down, deep under layers of “I’m fine” and “It’s nothing”—they rise up like smoke in my presence. I don’t have to say a word. My energy pulls your truth to the surface. You can glare, you can gossip, you can throw shade. But the only thing I’m guilty of is holding up a mirror.
I am the reminder that no matter how hard you try to hide, energy never lies. You can script your words, rehearse your smile, perfect your handshake—none of it matters to an empath. We read the language of the soul, the dialect of the heart, the dialect you forgot you were speaking.
You say I’m “too sensitive,” but maybe you’re just too detached from your own feelings. You say I “take things too personally,” but maybe you’re just uncomfortable that someone can see behind your walls. You say I’m “intense,” but that’s what it feels like to walk around with your truth echoing in my bones.
I am not here to make you comfortable. I am not here to soothe your ego or tiptoe around your wounds. I am here to light up your darkness and call out your shadows. I am the storm that shakes loose your secrets, the wildfire that burns away your bullshit, the earthquake that cracks your mask. And if you can’t handle me, maybe it’s time you handle yourself.
Because the truth is, every time you cringe around me, every time you feel the urge to run, every time you flare up with irritation or dismiss me with a roll of your eyes, that’s your soul screaming to be seen. I didn’t create your discomfort—I just turned on the light.
If you feel an instant dislike for me, maybe it’s not me you’re hating. Maybe it’s the reflection of your own denied truth. Maybe it’s the echo of your own suppressed dreams, your own abandoned power, your own untamed wildness. I am just the canvas. You are the painter.
I am not afraid of your darkness. I am not fazed by your chaos. I am not intimidated by your rage, your grief, your jealousy, or your pain. I have learned to dance with all those energies. I have made peace with my own shadows, and that’s why yours don’t scare me. That’s why I can hold up the mirror—because I’ve stared into it myself.
You can call me intimidating, bitchy, too much, too loud, too deep. I’ll wear those titles like the crown I was born for. Because I know what I am: a soul that refuses to play small, a spirit that won’t dim her light to soothe your insecurity, a heart that won’t apologize for feeling everything so fiercely.
Empaths are not fragile. We are not weak. We are the original badasses. We have survived the wars of the soul, the heartbreak of the world, and still, we rise. We are the seers, the feelers, the truth-tellers, the boundary-breakers. We are the ones who remind you of what you’ve forgotten: your own power, your own pain, your own possibility.
So, if you feel uncomfortable around me, if you want to run or lash out or hide, ask yourself: What am I afraid to see? What am I denying in myself? What am I projecting onto her? Because the longer you hide from your truth, the heavier it gets. And one day, it’ll break free—whether in my presence, or alone in the dark.
I won’t apologize for being the mirror. I won’t shrink for your comfort. I won’t carry what isn’t mine. I’ll reflect it back to you, raw and real, until you’re ready to claim it for yourself. Until you’re ready to stop running. Until you’re ready to meet yourself, eye to eye, heart to heart.
Because that’s what I do. That’s what we empaths do. We bring the truth to the surface. We burn away the lies. We wake up the world, one reflection at a time.
So if you can’t handle the heat, don’t blame the fire. And if you see something you don’t like in my eyes, remember: I’m just the mirror, babe. The real work—that’s all you.
And when you’re finally ready to see yourself, all of yourself, you’ll find me here—standing in the light, unafraid, unapologetic, and absolutely unstoppable. Because that’s what it means to be an empath. That’s what it means to be me.
And honey, that’s power. Real, untamed, wild, bitchy, beautiful power. Own it or run from it—the choice is yours. But know this: The mirror never lies."
-Steve De'lano Garcia
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I”m only recently learning to understand my innate neurodivergent processing styles of being an extremely empathic highly sensory person (HSP) with ADHD. I have a disorganized insecure attachment style and struggle with C-PTSD. I grew up with so many unconscious strategies to dissociate and be emotionally disconnected.
It had been so challenging to understand how the early developmental trauma/emotional neglect/abuse from being raised by narcissistic emotionally unavailable parents impacted my ability to connect to my emotions. That I now know meant they were emotionally immature parents incapable of showing, modeling, and expressing emotions in healthy ways. This messed with being innate empathic. While I could rarely connect to my own emotions. I was like an emotional sponge to everyone and everything around me.
I noticed this group today. I have not been on the Mighty in a long time. I have grown so much since first posting on this app in 2018. Tracking emotions is still very difficult for me.
I only discovered this week that when multiple life challenges overlap and overwhelm me at the same time makes me extremely resentful. I only recently learned that resentments is stored anger. Think of built up anger of decades of being emotionally dismissed by those who are supposed to love you the most. I became so counter dependent. Growing up thinking I have only myself to count on. That I do not expect help from anyone. I don’t expect anyone to love me. So when faced with challenges I automatically feel completely abandoned, alone and unlovable.
So today I can say I am feeling angry, hurt, isolated, alone, abandoned, dismissed, resentful, sad, uncertain. I’m actually allowing myself to sit with this discomfort. Oddly with this clarity also has me feeling some acceptance of just being in my present experience. Surprisingly the clarity is bringing a sense of peace. Well I think it’s peace. It is new for me to recognize I can experience both pleasant and unpleasant emotions at the same time.
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I'm feeling like a burden.
Extroverted people take so much space (that´s my experience in daily life).
For me as #HSP and introverted person, it feels like I have only little space to be myself.
It´s so challanging.....
I´m happy about the few uplifting social interactions. (Of course I wish there would be more of them.)
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I am a #HSP in which my emotions can sometimes get the better of me. I feel #overwhelmed by my surroundings and sometimes feel like I have to hide away. It helps to get away sometimes.. especially when there is too much emotional events taking place around me. I know I cannot watch the news, it's too much for me and I never know what to expect.
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being an empath and a HSP isnt easy..you deal with your emotions on top of other peoples emotions that you feel as your own..it can be very draining and you get overstimulated very easily and need to isolate to recharge.
i have been around negative people and literally could feel they're negativity..its not a good feeling..you feel extremely valnerable and its stressful..ive noticed the older i get the more stimulating fairs and parks are.. the more people im around..the more im going to feel..
its extremely important to take care of your mental health no matter who you are but you have to work extra hard at taking care of it as a HSP and an empathetic person.. remember:YOU GOT THIS ❤️
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