I am Proud of Myself
I am proud of myself. I made it through in my opinion the coldest, darkest and longest month of the year. January! It was a rough holiday season as usual for me. I counted the days in dread not like an eager youngster for Christmas to come and GO! It did but my expectations for a new start, a fresh January never came.
The depression never left as January progressed. I had to adjust meds and sleeping habits. But I just couldn't find a purpose to stay out of bed or some days even get out of bed.
Then on January 30th my wife and I acknowledged with pride our first date anniversary. Eighteen years ago, in 2005.
Now she looks me in the eyes everyday and says, “I love you” and “You’re going to be fine” You're not going to kill yourself or die tonight"
My purpose to me often seems unclear. But a major part of why I am here on this earth is to share many happy moments with my wife and goldendoodle. I don’t need a career to define me as a person.
I am proud of myself for standing up to my illness today. I took a shower, made a nice lunch for myself, walked the dog, journaled, surfed the web and did all the laundry.
I am proud of myself for fighting the negative thoughts that are trying to pull me to the rumination hell of my bed.
So with January gone and the picture attached to this article posted in my work space area I am ready to say “I am proud of myself” every day.
Okay today was a great start.
Share any proud moments or just give it a like.
Thanks for reading.