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My Internal Guild Battle for my children #
My thought and guilt get in the way more that I should allow. The fear that my children will eventually be told that the reason they were taken away TWICE was because there Mothers overpowering addiction. How do I answer their questions if they ever google my name. Or someone tells them about me being arrested . I’m working so hard and have clean 13 months (as of yesterday)!!! I have one of my boys back and the other will be home soon. But home is in a shelter for now. I just got a job again last month after trying for MONTHS and couldn’t find anything. I was hitting one wall after the next and I finally feel like I’m climbing to the surface. But will all the wonderful things happening; I cry myself to sleep every night in hopes my 9 year old won’t hear me. I feel like I ruined their lives because they have been taken away by ACS for the 2 Nd time since March of 2017. How does someone let that happen.? Drugs is a NIGHTMARE that never goes away unless I work really hard and make a daily choice. I just want the pain to stop and keep moving forward. I have really accomplished so much but I’m so sad , depressed and GUILT takes control of my mind..... #pleasemakeitstop #help #Pleasedontjudgeme
#Addiction#MomGuilt
