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Introducing a new theory of well-being

#MentalHealth #positivepsychology

“PERMA” is an acronym for the five facets of well-being according to Seligman:

P – Positive Emotions: Even though seeking positive emotions alone is not a very effective way to boost your well-being, experiencing positive emotion is still an important factor. Part of well-being is enjoying yourself in the moment, i.e., experiencing positive emotions;

E – Engagement: Having a sense of engagement, in which we may lose track of time and become completely absorbed in something we enjoy and excel at, is an important piece of well-being. It’s hard to have a developed sense of well-being if you are not truly engaged in anything you do;

R – (Positive) Relationships: Humans are social creatures, and we rely on connections with others to truly flourish. Having deep, meaningful relationships with others is vital to our well-being;

M – Meaning: Even someone who is deliriously happy most of the time may not have a developed sense of well-being if they do not find meaning in their life. When we dedicate ourselves to a cause or recognize something bigger than ourselves, we experience a sense of meaning that there is simply no replacement for;

A – Accomplishment / Achievement: We all thrive when we are succeeding, achieving our goals, and bettering ourselves. Without a drive to accomplish and achieve, we are missing one of the puzzle pieces of authentic well-being.

This model gives us a comprehensive framework for understanding well-being as well as a foundation for improving well-being.

You can refer to this:

resiliens.com/resilify/program/positive-psychology

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Perfectionism

#MentalHealth #perfectionism

People with perfectionism hold themselves to impossibly high standards. They think what they do is never good enough.

Some people mistakenly believe that perfectionism is a healthy motivator, but that’s not the case. Perfectionism can make you feel unhappy with your life. It can lead to depression, anxiety, eating disorders, and self-harm. Eventually, it can also lead you to stop trying to succeed. Even mild cases can interfere with your quality of life, affecting your personal relationships, education, or work.

Perfectionism can affect young people as well as adults. Children and teenagers are often driven to be overachievers in their schoolwork as well as activities such as sports, clubs, community service, and jobs. This can lead to an obsession with success. Ultimately, it can interfere with the ability to achieve it.

Perfectionism is a trait that makes life an endless report card on accomplishments or looks. When healthy, it can be self-motivating and drive you to overcome adversity and achieve success. When unhealthy, it can be a fast and enduring track to unhappiness.

You can refer to this:

resiliens.com/resilify/program/how-to-overcome-perfectionism

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In the quiet turmoil of each day

Living with CRPS and Advanced Wet Macular Degeneration: A Journey Through Unyielding Pain and Loss

I live every day burdened by not one, but two life-altering battles. The relentless agony of CRPS—a disease that followed a botched surgery and irrevocably altered my course—remains a constant reminder of how quickly my world can break apart. Unlike type I, which can strike without warning, my type II carries with it the indelible evidence of past trauma, a wound that refuses to heal.

The toll of CRPS goes far beyond physical torment. I have lost my job, my home, and the relationships that once anchored me—my wife and children have gradually withdrawn, leaving me in isolation and despair. Often dubbed “the suicide disease,” CRPS claims its nickname through staggering realities: patients face a nearly five-fold increase in suicide risk, with some studies pointing to roughly one suicide for every 1,800 individuals. In my darkest moments—especially during extreme flares—the thought of ending it all crosses my mind, an echo of the silent, shared struggle that countless others endure.

As if the physical pain weren’t enough, I now fight another battle: the creeping devastation of advanced wet macular degeneration. My vision, once a vibrant window to the world, is dimming and distorting before my eyes. The subtle details of a loved one’s smile, the vivid hues of a sunset—all are fading into a blur of shadows. This loss of sight forces me to navigate a world that is increasingly unrecognizable, adding another layer of isolation and fear to an already fragile existence.

In my interactions, I often pretend that I am not in pain. When someone I truly value—someone whose laughter and warmth have the remarkable power to momentarily lift my spirits—asks how I’m doing, I hide both the searing pain in my body and the despair in my eyes caused by my vision loss. I do this in a desperate effort to shield them from constant pity, to allow a glimmer of normalcy in our conversation. In truth, it’s their presence that soothes my emotional exhaustion, providing a brief escape from the never-ending realities of a progressive, incurable disease.

Starting new relationships or forging friendships now comes with the burden of explaining a complex dual narrative: one of relentless physical agony and another of profound, encroaching darkness. The vulnerability required is immense, and all too often, the well-meaning yet misguided advice—that I simply need to try harder—feels like a dismissal of the intricate and unresolvable challenges we face. Such comments, coupled with a false sense of pity, do nothing to heal the wounds or slow the progression of either CRPS or macular degeneration.

I make these posts not just to vent or complain but to raise awareness about two very rare and persistently misunderstood conditions. Far too many medical professionals have little working knowledge of CRPS or the intricacies of advanced wet macular degeneration. As a result, patients like me are left navigating a treatment landscape where expert guidance is scarce and misconceptions run rampant. By sharing my story, I hope to illuminate the harsh realities that define my daily existence—and the existence of many others—urging both the medical community and the wider public to foster a deeper understanding and more compassionate support.

In the quiet turmoil of each day, I cling to the fleeting moments of connection—the laughter of a friend, the warmth of shared memories, and the unspoken support that reminds me there is still life beyond the pain and fading images. Though my body and vision may continue to deteriorate, these genuine connections are invaluable in softening the harsh edges of a future that all too often feels grim.

03/29/2025

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Authentic Grace

I am grateful to those rare souls who grace my life not for any gain but purely from the essence of their being. Their presence is a spontaneous act of pure volition—conversations that meander like streams of thought over the phone, and shared moments in person that ripple with the sincerity of our very existence. In their uncalculated generosity, they mirror the beauty of human connection, a delicate tapestry woven from empathy, respect, and unspoken understanding. They enrich the symphony of my life not as transactions, but as genuine expressions of the art of living, reminding me that the truest relationships are unburdened by expectation and flourish in the light of authentic grace.

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Endings and beginnings

It's a sentimental title, but it's accurate to what I'm experiencing - the end of many things I've known, and the beginning of many other things I've dreamed of for a long time. I start my PhD in August, and am slowly saying goodbye to my current music students as I look forward to beginning a TA position with my university.

I teach voice. It's special to me that as a disabled person who has a sometimes difficult, and always evolving relationship with my body, I'm entrusted with the care of such an embodied instrument. As I watch my students embrace their unique sound (and experiment with some wild and wonderful variations along the way), I find that I also witness students coming home to their bodies and finding power within them. For a long time, I thought that I could "get lost in the music" - that in being a faithful interpreter of the works I studied, I could somehow erase myself from the equation. Teaching helped me see that my goal was both impossible and misguided. My voice exists within my body, and I can't honour one without honouring and loving the other.

As I think about welcoming several new students and becoming a part of their journeys, I'm also setting an intention for myself. I want to learn to love and embrace my body just as I encourage my students to do - both to set an example and to give myself a new beginning. What could it mean for me to love both my body and my voice, instead of trying to sever one from the other? I'm excited to think further about this question over the next three years.

#CerebralPalsy #Disability #MentalHealth

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I’m new here!

Hi, my name is Unicornkween. I'm here because I’m feeling alone. Recent breakup of long term relationship. just beat thyroid cancer in Febuary. Having weight loss surgery the end of the month. No real support so nerves just getting to me…

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Migraine #AutismSpectrumDisorder #alpha-1AntitrypsinDeficiency #Obesity #Epilepsy

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I'm new here!

Hi, my name is Suzziesuzze. I'm here because I have gone through a difficult journey and have just ended a 16 year trauma bond and I want to heal myself. I have just done some work on inner child healing and recognise my upbringing has made me feel unworthy of love. I want to make necessary changes to my life so I can develop healthy friendships and relationships in the future.

#MightyTogether

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