Relationships

They don’t speak to me. They only speak about me. They do not invite, include or try to engage with me on any level other than accusing and judging. Hearsay and gossip has played a role in all relationships, my whole life and I do not trust or want to engage with people who based their opinions of me off a spokesperson who has that much animosity towards me. To dislike and disrespect a person for that long without communicating is a form of harassment. I have not bothered anyone from my past, from other families or reached out to his. All spoken was from him and them. I have kept to myself to keep my personal thoughts to myself. Invading my privacy, publicly shaming me and discussing my personal life shows your lack of character and compassion. I choose to stay quiet about the things that have been shared.That is controlling my emotions and not reacting to drama. I would appreciate them to mind their own and leave me alone. I was voted out and have recently learned how you were trying to get me, to be taken out of state just so you can walk away clean.

The truth will come out.
And I’m sorry to the ones doing the harm, but saying it out loud Again…
You, trying to control natural order, is careless. There are far worse consequences, to messing with Faith, than hurting someone directly.
When you alter and soil, yes shit on, someone else’s life, out of malice and spite, with ill intent, you set off a chain reaction of events that result in harming others.
That is exactly why, you do not go around hurting people out of pride, vengeance and ego! It, hurts, other, people!

If I were in that family, I’d be taking a serious look at all involved and question the motives for doing what was done. Take the mirror out!
Stop looking at my life and start looking inside your soul and why would you think doing what you’ve done is healthy for anyone involved? It is wrong and I’m going to be talking about it in order to heal from it. I will be asking questions and I will be naming names. It is wrong on so many levels and it is not a matter of move on, let go or forget about it! I have goals for my future. I am watching him be pulled and I do not want it anymore for that reason alone. He did choose them, he chose his family over us, my family over us and his life over Us. I have no choice but to choose me only. I keep giving to someone who hates me and it is self deprivation at this point. I am going to have a impasse with how and where to go because I cannot maintain this house or upset their family members. I’m not involved or invited and I have no context overall of their situations. I no longer believe them, read into what they tell me or trust them and it was designed for that purpose. I am not giving them the effort or anything since they cannot show me the respect of transparency or accountability for the past six years. They prefer to set me up, rather than be honest over what they have done, instead of communicating. But keep telling yourself and them, you can’t talk to me.

I used to think support had to come from one person who really understood everything. Lately, I’ve started seeing it more like a web. One person might understand trauma. Someone else understands being neurodivergent. A peer support group can give me the relief of hearing, “Me too.” A meditation community can help me slow down. Sometimes my partner helps just by sitting beside me when my brain is overloaded.

That has taken some pressure off my relationships. No one person has to meet every emotional need I have, and I don’t have to find the perfect person who understands every part of me.

As someone who is autistic, has ADHD, and lives with mental health challenges, connection matters a lot to me. Isolation can make everything feel heavier, but connection doesn’t always have to mean a deep conversation. Sometimes it’s attending a support group, sending a message, playing D&D with people I enjoy, meditating with others, or simply being around someone who feels safe.

I’m starting to think a healthy support system is less like finding one perfect lifeline and more like building lots of small bridges. Some are strong enough to carry the hard stuff. Others are simply places where I can laugh, learn, rest, or feel like myself.

I need all of those bridges.