Suicidal Thoughts

Hi, my name is RosieLynn246. I'm here because I've been diagnosed with multiple mental health disorders and no one in my life really understands what its like. They try to be there and support me, but it ends up hurting me more sometimes. I want people to know they are not the label that society put on them and that they are more than there disorder. I also had a friend who committed suicide in 2023 when we were 17. We were so close that it almost killed me when she passed. I've struggled with suicidal thoughts, self-harming and anorexia since I was 7 years old and my friend was one of the strongest people in my life that I knew. I want other people to be able to reach out and get help before it gets to that point and I feel that everyone deserves someone that can be there to support them and love them even if they don't personally know them.

#MightyTogether #Anxiety #Depression #BipolarDisorder #PTSD #ADHD #EatingDisorder #OCD #Grief

I just passed the 14th anniversary of my suicide attempt. And as happens most years, I regret that I allowed myself to be talked out of it back then. I feel like each year that I wait before I end it all I just widen the pool of how many people will be impacted in the ripples of the aftermath. Every day and month means more people who I cross path with who will be stunned and shaken when they find out that I'm no longer alive by my own hand. And for the people who I've let closer in, the damage of waiting is even stronger, since then they will have more time to allow me deeper into their hearts, which means that the scars afterward will be deeper in their hearts. I almost want to spend the next period of time being obnoxious to everyone so that they should be relieved when I am gone (though in hindsight they might feel guilty for missing what they decide is a cry for help).

I'm not ready to take my life, but I wish to not wake up tomorrow. Or for some accident to befall me so that I die but not of my own hand. It's hard to keep fighting when things seem to be getting progressively worse. From the outside I might seem to be doing better but that's just because I'm deeper in freeze and/or disassociation, i.e. the difference is not an improvement.

Please don't comment how my life has value or how other people will be hurt, that's not helpful to me. It's also not helpful to comment that things will get better, since that's not my experience.

#SuicidalThoughts #SuicideAttemptSurvivors #Suicide

On the eleventh of February I was in the ER for suicidal thoughts that I was planning to act on. and I spent six days in the mental health ward. I was broken, I was scared, I felt like nothing could ever get better, and I still feel like that. But the hospital, having time for myself, away from everyone, everything, finally had someone taking care of me instead of me being everything for everyone else. I still can’t process it. The part of me that hates myself still believes it was selfish, like I shouldn’t have gotten help. Like I don’t deserve it.

I still feel suicidal. Still have urges to cut.

But at least I know I’m not alone.

And at least I have one place I know I can go.

it can get better ❤️‍🩹

#SuicidalThoughts #SuicidePrevention #MentalHealth