This

This weekend I though several times of just being done with everything. Saturday I laid in bed all day, but got up a did some laundry and wrapped presents. I guess my fake face needed to charge back up. I have been extremely depressed since the nightmare I had the night before. I have lost both my parents, but in my dream they were saying the most awful things to me and I would look down and my skin was rotting off. I just can’t get past it. Sunday wasn’t any better. I fought my my significant other about how he is never here for me. I call my boss and asked if I could take a PTO day today and she said yes. I am looking for a way out of the dark, but I think I forgot my flashlight

What can I say ? What am I dealing with ? Ummm , depression , anger , sadness , loud tetanus in both ears, Vertigo and I’m going def , almost complete now thanks to the Covid vaccine , NOT COVID , I’ve been Vac injured ..How can I be fixed if NO Dr will talk about anything to do with Covid Vac !!! I’m sick of it all and many times I’ve had dark thoughts about ending it and almost did in 2019 when car left the road and crashed over 1200 feet down !! I survive the crash of a broken neck and broken back, but have since fully recovered but still dealing with the other stuff !! I have a mostly normal life , I’m single , have good friends , good job of 27 years , new car 2020, I’m out of debt and still can’t beat the sad and dark thoughts …. #This sucks ! Anyone else out there been Vac injured ???

#daily reflections and journal#Distract me#chronic pain#chronic illnesses,#Fibromyalgia #positivw #This too shall pass#smile n others smile back
Lots of things got done but none on a schedule!
Enough of schedules during the week.
Watched the hummingbirds hit my feeder today.
Grateful for the quiet weekend!

How do I do this? I just started a new job, but the new routine has thrown my Fibromyalgia into a feeding frenzy. I am in so much pain I just want to curl up into a ball and not get out of bed. But I don’t want to be a disappointment. How do I do this??? #Fibro #agh #how #todo #This

Today I had to cancel a dentist appointment I had made 6 months ago! I made the appointment for early afternoon as I knew mornings were extra hard on my body. I still felt like s- - t cancelling 1 1/2 hrs prior to my time due to pain and complete exhaustion! I knew I couldn’t struggle through getting dressed and driving over -let alone making small talk, etc. Has anyone ever found themselves in this situation? I had a recent blood test and am scheduled with an e-visit with my doctor tomorrow evening to which I hope I can get some answers for my constant fatigue! Nothing will take away the embarassment of today, however!
#Fibromyalgia , #Constantly tired. # Susieq. #This is my life?