I would imagine you’re running around cleaning up the house for any company that might come by. Cooking up a storm for all the goodies and meals you’ll need to feed the troops. And finishing buying and wrapping any presents that still need to be done. Exactly what Christmas is all about. What it never was but was supposed to be about for me.
And for my Christmas or at least the day before Christmas Eve, I’m here all alone packing everything the dog will need for a few days with mom then packing the same for myself. Emptying the trash and checking in on my mother as she has been home alone for the last three days.
You see my brother that normally stays with her has an upper respiratory infection just like the one I’ve been fighting to get over. So he had to stay away from mom because even the slightest of a cold could kill her. So she had been home alone for the last 3 nights. Not a very comfortable place for someone on hospice to be in.
And at the same time my sister Lisa is also getting over a respiratory infection and she has had to stay away from mom for days now also.
And to make the whole situation even more in the holiday spirit Christmas Dinner was supposed to be at Lisa’s but my niece Hope cam we down with a bad case of COVID and there’s a good chance we will not be able to spend possibly moms final Christmas together as a family. Joy to the fucking world.
So Christmas may just be me and mom without the always marvelous dinner and festivities. But we will make the best of it. Maybe get Chinese food as they are about the only places that will be open and call it a night. Maybe a special night just me and mom and maybe the only time that can ever happen again.
So 2024 is a year I will never forget but will always wish I could. The end of my marriage, watching my mom slowly fade away before the inevitable, a Christmas that was supposed to bring my whole family together when we needed it most and the end of so many of my dreams for what could have been.
So enjoy what you have, live in the moment and be grateful for the people in your life because you never know when they can be taken away in a moment without any warning.
Peace 🕊️