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Timing is everything....

Prayers never go unanswered. And as waves crash against God's boundary lines so it is with me. I enjoyed my last dip in the waves this year.
They reflect my thoughts on employment. I got a a call from my boss at the agency. Timing is everything & I am in lockstep with my Father. I did everything perfectly on Thursday. Monday is a new chapter. I hit the ground running my agency boss is the new owner. God's favor in action- she's reaching out to Boca Raton to also help me find a better fit employment wise. I have faithful Mr. Bob at O.IC. to help me, Connie who I worship with at Career Source of Broward County to help connect me with Veteran's employment assistance, I a number of vet non-profits now to work with...thanks to playing hooky on Thursday which was a God mission to this next chapter. God never drops on your ***.

He is good & faithful. I will need to see if I qualify for unemployment I should: the company sharedxwitj my boss I was a poor fit. I got unemployment on that in 2019 right before Covid struck the planet. Always keep your eyes open no matter what the situation is. And be ready to act & move! I will keep you posted.

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**Mental Health: Understanding, Importance, and Solutions**

**Mental Health: Understanding, Importance, and Solutions**

Mental health is an essential part of human well-being. It influences how we think, feel, and act, and it also affects our ability to handle stress, relate to others, and make choices. Yet, despite its importance, mental health has long been overlooked in many cultures and societies, often stigmatized and misunderstood. In recent years, however, the importance of mental health has gained wider recognition, prompting important conversations, research, and action. This essay explores the definition of mental health, the challenges individuals face in managing their mental health, and the ways to promote mental well-being in society.

### **Defining Mental Health**

Mental health refers to a person's emotional, psychological, and social well-being. It encompasses how individuals feel about themselves, how they relate to others, and how they cope with life’s challenges. Mental health affects every aspect of life, from the ability to work, build relationships, and lead a fulfilling life to handling crises or stressful situations. Good mental health is more than just the absence of mental illness—it is about thriving in all aspects of life, feeling balanced, and having a positive outlook on life.

Mental health issues, however, can emerge in various forms. Anxiety, depression, schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) are just a few of the many conditions that fall under the category of mental illness. These conditions can significantly impact a person's quality of life and require medical treatment, therapy, and support. Mental health disorders are not limited to any particular group; they can affect anyone, regardless of age, background, or socioeconomic status.

### **The Stigma Surrounding Mental Health**

Despite growing awareness, mental health is still surrounded by stigma in many parts of the world. People with mental health disorders often face prejudice, discrimination, and isolation, which can prevent them from seeking help or treatment. This stigma is rooted in historical misunderstandings and a lack of education about mental health. For decades, individuals struggling with mental illness were often viewed as weak, abnormal, or even dangerous. These harmful beliefs perpetuated feelings of shame and guilt among those suffering from mental health issues.

The stigma surrounding mental health can also be seen in the workplace, schools, and even within families. People are often reluctant to discuss their mental health struggles for fear of being judged, alienated, or seen as incapable. As a result, many individuals suffer in silence, which can worsen their symptoms and delay seeking help.

However, changing the narrative around mental health is possible. Public campaigns, advocacy groups, and increasing media coverage have played crucial roles in raising awareness and reducing stigma. Many high-profile individuals, including athletes, celebrities, and public figures, have openly discussed their own mental health struggles, helping to normalize these conversations. In fact, studies show that open discussions about mental health can promote understanding and support, helping individuals feel less isolated and more empowered to seek help.

### **The Impact of Mental Health on Society**

Mental health problems have a significant impact on individuals, families, communities, and societies at large. According to the World Health Organization (WHO), depression is the leading cause of disability worldwide, and suicide rates continue to rise. Mental health disorders are associated with a wide range of negative outcomes, including substance abuse, unemployment, homelessness, and strained relationships.

In the workplace, mental health challenges can lead to decreased productivity, absenteeism, and burnout. Employees struggling with mental illness may experience difficulty concentrating, completing tasks, or interacting with coworkers, which affects both their performance and the overall workplace environment. On a larger scale, mental health issues place a considerable burden on healthcare systems, as individuals seek medical care for mental health-related problems, often in emergency settings, due to a lack of preventative care or early intervention.

Children and adolescents are particularly vulnerable to mental health challenges. In today’s fast-paced, high-pressure environment, many young people experience anxiety, depression, and self-esteem issues at an alarming rate. The rise of social media has added another layer to these concerns, as young people often compare themselves to idealized images and experiences, leading to feelings of inadequacy and isolation. Early intervention and support for young people can help to mitigate the long-term effects of these challenges, enabling them to grow into resilient and mentally healthy adults.

### **Challenges in Accessing Mental Health Care**

One of the most significant barriers to mental health care is access. In many regions, especially in low-income or rural areas, mental health services are either underfunded, unavailable, or prohibitively expensive. Even in wealthier countries, the cost of mental health care can be a barrier for individuals who are uninsured or lack adequate health coverage. Therapy sessions, medication, and counseling can be costly, and for those without proper insurance, the cost can be a major deterrent to seeking help.

Additionally, there is often a shortage of mental health professionals, including therapists, psychologists, and psychiatrists, leading to long wait times for appointments. In some areas, individuals may have to wait months before they can access the care they need. This delay can be particularly dangerous for those with severe mental health issues, as it may increase the risk of self-harm or suicide.

Telehealth services, which became more widely available during the COVID-19 pandemic, have been a helpful solution for many people who face barriers to in-person care. Through virtual therapy sessions and online support groups, individuals can access care from the comfort of their homes, making it easier to seek help. While telehealth is not a perfect solution, it has been an important step toward improving access to mental health care.

### **Promoting Mental Well-being**

The good news is that mental health problems are treatable, and there are numerous ways to promote mental well-being, both individually and within communities. First and foremost, it’s essential to recognize that seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a necessary step toward healing. Whether it’s through therapy, medication, or support groups, there are many options for individuals to manage their mental health and regain control of their lives.

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1 1/2 pounds at birth n 3 months early in October 1951

Just spent 3 months in the hospital for COVID, pneumonia, kidneys shutting down. Very dehydrated both August and September. Drs didn't think I'd walk away from the hospital. I beat DEATH.

Died many times in my early life cuz I was so fragile. But I beat DEATH.

Guess you gotta say ; she's a FIGHTER

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Help! EOL panic attack week/weekend #EOL worries,fears. #Cancer progess, mets fear.

1. Panic over health changes, test results. and treatment changes.. Feel hesitant about sharing fears with spouse because he already heard a brief bit of it last week and he also takes caref his 88 year old mum twice a week.

2a. Also both ourselves and our families are neurodidiverse including autism for ourselves, BPD among some of his family, and OCD, within my family and possibly Aspergers (sp?). Also cpstd from older generations, in both our families.

No we don't have family contact if we can help it. Family involvement can make it worse.

3. I was diagnosed in June 2021 luncaner with lung cancer in the lower right lobe, staged 4a or 4b. I was advised to get my affairs in order, but was put on a chemo regime. Had a delighted oncologist 6 weeks later ,as the regime was working at the time.

4. I've had scans of all types over 3.5 years, and genetic testing. Last year, some small Mets were detected and I was put back on infusions while staying on targresso ( oral, daily). I have had difficulty with infusions, usually dealing with brain fog and some incontinence(sorry). Last fall I experienced balance problems and had a few falls within my home. my mum-in -law lent me her rolling walkerto try out. I now own one.

Along with my cane collection.
The collection which I didn't use after falling backwards off my front step while trying to use my quad cane on Sept 10 of thisyear. My back is OK now, except for lost back and knee strength from resting on the futon bed without walking much.

However I became afraid of my body/balance and my house which is about my age. And is semisplit level.

5. My back and period wobbles were becoming my biggest over the cancer.
Then I had an MRI done on my head two or three weeks ago. My main oncologist's
Associate broke the news to us (he was the "onc" scheduled that day) that there appeared to be a lesion on the cerebellum. My poor husband was shaken.

6. Now,2-3bweeks before this news I was switched off tragresso to a new med just approved by FDA. It's formulated--along with a new infusion--to target mmy cancer and possible mets. By last Thursday he had called another prescription for a steroid to work on the lesion. He wants to see how this works before pushing on to radiation therapy. But he would like meto ge ta follow up MRI-- farther had that request in by Friday.

7. So far, the steroid seems to add tothe brain fog. I'm supposed to take it 3x a day with food , along with my nightly Paxil. On Saturday, my husband and I got our flu and covid vaccinessothat effect may have added to my fog and weekend panic.

8, Monday will be my first day on my own since the steroids (he tends to his mom on Monday and Thursday).I will attempt to work from home with brain fog. Tuesday is my next infusion at 8:45. (I forgot--Monday I get a blood draw at7:30am for my Tuesday infusion. )

9. i'm wiped out physically mentally emotionally and spiritualy.
Tuesday is the election for hell which I wanted to participate in--but I can't find my ballot. Following an infusionin the morning, I don't trust myself to fill out a provisional ballot.

We did find old paper work for the Dept of moto vehicles. So now I can get my cardp tags I should have ordered last month. What the hell, im afraid to drive myself. It barely matters.
Next week is a 3 day weekend. Maybe I'll get our taxes extension filed. Like I was supposed to last month. I hate ADHD. or AuHD. My brains and life and finances are falling apart. I don't have my funeral or will planned. I'm the one that does the bills,like my Mom did. I know how that turned out when she passed before my dad.

Oh and retirement. I had to wait until this year to retire and still retain my med benefits for my husband and I, Last week the college I work for announced that we a)l have to work on campus starting January. I replied on Wednesday this week that I wanted to retire. I wanted to use next 3 day weekend to work on retirement. After the lesion news of last Thursday--
I don't know .
My phaser is set to stunned.

Anyone got a prayer or a Saint or some juju. Because I'm out.

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Not able to do this anymore. Help w your thoughts pls

I have spent more than the last 5 years trying in every way i could to get the medical system and my community mental health providers to see/be willing to see that i had some kind if parasite attacking me. From convo 1 i was tokd kim you have bipolar 1 (and complex trauma) and this is psychosis nothing does what you are describing. Many times i have thought the visible evidence was enough that finally being literally treated in abusive manners for wanting help was going to be done because thjngs were so clear, only to find er drs and acute care providers etc who wont even let me tell them whst has promoted me to do things like sit (as partiently as possibke—- and w my myriad if medical disabilities most importantky a primary immunodeficiency, i have spent lots of time in hospitals), all night to be seeen in ER for the situation only to have what hapoened 2 1/2 weeks ago and again yesterday (monday morning) happen. The dr wont even let me tell or show them anything, 2 1/2 weeks ago literally saying that this is a psychosis and im discharging you and be unwilling to talk or interact any further, or yesrerday when i had almost passed out was still having the room spin and feeling extremely shaky and weak — note low potasssiumnabd a significantly prolonged QTc (cardiac interval) had caused me to pass out and spend 6 days here and i hadnt been home 24 hours yet — and we very quickly discovered i am now covid positive.— the dr once again discharged me and i tried to say w my primary immunodeficiency and so forth and there is more medically and environmentally hapoening than i wanted to get into and she told me that “ you are being discharged andx thsr The ER is not the venue for this.” I know this sounds completely crazy but i am sitting here in the waiting room waiting for tgd bus to start runing (i guess anyway) because ibcame back 7 hoursblater havung chest pain and also beyond desperate but knowing opening my mouth woukd definitely not go well — esp as the nurses were disgusted at my return and laughing as tho i was completely stupid and completekh deaf despite fact that even with a good protective headcover on and a shirt that covers my full back snd neck , so much is falling or diving or whatever off my body that the stretcher sheet was visible startjn v to be coated and my purple shirt us more white than purple and anyone who stood near and looking at my and coukd see could hardly havd missed the things falling and moving, i was discharged before 2am and have sat here in a (very very unusually and strangely empty ) waiting room w no patients for 4 hours waiting for busee to. Start running or uber prices to stop surging all the while trying to figure oilutvwgat the hell to do now as my therapist and my pharmacumist best frirmds will telll you this is real and we have been talking about thd possibity that after 5 + years and as severe as the problem has clearly become kver this calrndsr year, even if everyyne did tgeir very vest snd everythjng tight this may now not be survivable medically, and after being ignored while i know they had to see this and after all the abuse and mistreatment and iver and ovdr againnripping the life i keep startibv to piece togetger to shreds when this once again flares (although fir almost a year it gas jyst gotten worse andxworse — no flares) i have been sitting heres truthfully wishing i was t so damn stubborn about my surviving (over and over in my life) and tgst i wass braver so i could just end this withb my life. But i am me and botg those thjbgs are cery real abdc true about me, and so i literally ding kniw what to do. I cannot ince again. Go hime snd continue as my apt is so contaminated i get 20 x worse inb15 min and my most special, wonderful loving little esa kitty is clearky suffering noth from what i have spread tk her abx throughout thd space and from my ibability to comfort snd be tgeee anx make it better, and i hust cant even walk onto the hallway again the guikt and grief themselves might kill me frankly, but i know telling anyone here i am psychiatrically jot ok now wont be taken as an honest and real statement being made bc i am trying to do what is right, and i also know in any situation that i need an ambulance tgey will bring me gere no matter what i want, and havjng never been in tge er heree w a psych issue this got me sent trightbti psych section of er upon presentation of mysekfcwhen whetger this partg isxreal oorcpsychosis or whatever in their minds, i was saying i wass medically unwell. And seek in v meducal help and tgey frew labsxand took everything from. Me and held me w no medical or mh care at all ivernight onky to wakr me the next morning and inform me i had been discharged by tge dr before shift change and his deparrture almost 4 hrexearlier snd i needed to leave — and they had drawn labsxtgst ifcthey had lokked at woukd have shown them meducal need such that the QTc andxpotassium issues weee alreadyvpresent abd they onky worsened befotd i was back almost a week later w a dangerously low bp and not okay and tgey enddd up habmcubg to admit and keep me and provide mrdical treatment, i am being treated worse w every interaction i have w anyone here bc of that psych er now being on the recordx rather than my diagnoeses and meds bring in my echart and so forth. I dont have funds to ubdr or lyft elsewhere even though many teaching hospitalx in the metro anx suburban area, plus i know showing up
Elsewhere now woukd nr seen as a reason to believe i am acting in wats that give them every rught to treat me w no dignity or respect etc, and on top of that i am beyond exhausted and not well and feeling so so unable tk go try to takr bus anywhere in so many leveks, but hust ad ms unwilling to tryto get any more care here. And while i have nk plans i honestly havd never felt despite my many very serious illnesses and my multiple really bad experiences that have contributed to complex trauma, felt less interestec i or willing to continue w life. Help w encouragement or thoughts but not dictates oc what i need to di please! Thx

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Medical PTSD

In 2021, I went to an urgent care, telling them "this is the sickest I have ever been". I was told to get a rapid covid test and return in 3 hours which became 3 days because a doctor never officially read the same result I had in MyChart. Finally get in and am told I have a staph infection and given antibiotics, and told to return in 48 hours if there was no change. There wasn't. I went to the ER and they did a lot of labs. Ultimately sent me home with the admonition to see a hematologist. I happened to have a hematologist appointment 5 days later, but, if I hadn't it's pretty much impossible to get a new patient appointment in a few days' time. By the time that day rolled around, I was incontinent, vomiting, running a 102.0.0.5 fever. I called the doctor's office and asked to speak to the doctor and explained my situation. Because they use a different charting system, this was all news to her. She told me to go to a specific ER where she has privileges. I got there and was thrombocytopenid enough to be transfused with platelets. I was taken on 3 hour ambulance ride to 'the only available bed'. When I got to the new hospital I was gray, except for where I was bleeding around my mouth and eyes. Early the next morning a phlebotomist came to draw my blood with a pile of vials and bottles. Jokingly I asked if they were all for me. I was hungry but was not allowed to eat because I was NPO. About lunchtime I was wheeled to a CT machine for a guided bone marrow biopsy. The only thing they told me is I was pancytopenic (too low platelets, red blood cells and white blood cells), I was given more platelets, meds and antibiotics over the next 7 days and sent home. I still had no idea why this happened. A week later I saw my primary on video. Without discussing a diagnosis she told me to look up myelodysplastic syndrome. I looked it up and it sounded like cancer. I was, after all, on an oncology ward when I was in the hospital. Nobody said I had cancer or MDS nobody really said I had anything specific. I wanted answers and managed to get the bone marrow biopsy report and there was genetic damage in the DNA. My primary referred me to oncology locally. They said it was likely due to toxicity from taking methotrexate for alopecia. I wasn't so sure because I had no methotrexate in my system for 2.0.0.5 months. The life/death cycle of red blood cells is around 90 days but the white and platelets are much shorter so how is this drug affecting me? I don't know and nobody else does. A repeat biopsy 9 months later was clear. My blood recovered over the last 3.0.0.5 years.

Something that has plagued me for 30 years is neuropathy and weakness in my hands. I was tested over and over for diabetes and I did not have it. Somehow the doctors decided, since they had no answers, it was all in my head, and gave me psych meds (!). One doctor ordered a cervical MRI and I had degenerative disc disease that was slightly touching my spinal cord. I was told repeatedly this could not be the cause. I have had emg after emg, x-rays, ct scans, mri's, I'm surprised I don't glow in the dark!! Every neurologist has told me it's diabetic neuropathy. I guess the neuropathy started before the hyperglycemia that the $@!% psych meds created. Who am I to know? I'm just the patient.

I ask for a new neurology appointment at a different hospital. I was directed to the spinal clinic who told me the same %@@! thing - it's diabetic neuropathy. He said I needed a new emg and physical therapy, neither of which I can refer myself to and he did nothing to further that goal. I finally go to neurology and after looking at the same MRI the last neurosurgeon looked at said I needed surgery to relieve compression on my spine. Back to the spinal clinic but a different doctor, and he said I most definitely need surgery to prevent further damage. In the year between surgeon 1 and surgeon 2 I have lost so much function in my hands, I can not longer do anything detailed, play music and often I cannot write my name.

My surgery is scheduled in 4 months from now. I cant help but think that that loss of function could have been prevented but when one idiot doctor writes "diabetic polyneuropathy" on your chart, it becomes the diagnosis, regardless of history, so the first surgeon just saw that and blew me off.

These two examples are far from the only times I have had care delayed, denied or been blown off by physicians.

So now, every interaction I have with doctors is met with suspicion. Now a new doctor has to prove their trustworthiness. This is not a conscious decision - this is medical PTSD.

It is absurd that a condition has to get irreparably bad for a doctor to take action. I don't think, in schools of medicine, they discuss things like medical ptsd. Often, particularly surgeons, they think of the patient as the disease, not a person.

I wish I knew how to change that about medicine, but, I wouldn't know where to start. It seems explaining this to other doctors falls on deaf ears.

#medical #PTSD

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