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Can’t sleep

It’s half past 5 in the morning and I haven’t slept a wink! I’m at a really low ebb. The thoughts and feelings of hopelessness that have plagued me since I was a child are back in full force! I never know how long these episodes will pass until I can pretend to be "okay" again. Even though I can’t sleep I also can’t get myself out of bed. The only person I have to talk to is my mother and she already has her hands full! What do I need to do to keep from killing myself?! #DepressiveEpisodes #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BP


At The Bottom Of The Well

I’m at the bottom of a dark, deep well. Can anyone hear me? Does anyone care? Moved three times in 2 years, lost my toxic Mom in October, my bully brother is managing her estate & has been bullying me, had an aggressive landlord, a major flood, no heat, moved to a country farmhouse that needed work but due to housing shortage was desparate, got scammed by two contractors working together, they ripped the place apart, discovered it to be uninhabitable and got ran out of town by the landlord, my stuff is in the garage, I am homeless, left my teen living with their Godmother, lived in a motel for a week, left to another country to stay with my grouchy, bitchy husband who has 0 empathy, we finally talked about divorce, now I moved out of there since I can’t sleep, going back to US in April but will still be homeless, feeling totally lost, totally adrift, totally unloved (except for my dog and my teen), feeling like I don’t have what it takes for this modern life and unkind, dishonest people. Trying to stay strong. #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #Depression , #Anxiety , #CPTSD , #Mourning , #ChronicPain


Borderline Personality Disorder

My husband says I’m a nightmare to live with and has been very distant lately his therapist showed him the signs and symptoms of those with BPD and now he’s treating me like I’m some kind of monster. #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BP

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My dearest friend #SuicideLoss #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BP #Suicide

January 3, 2021 I woke up and saw on fb my best friend Marcie Elise was gone ( ; ) if you know that ; symbols then you understand I remember it’s was 9 am and my mommy was still asleep I yelled no please this can’t be true and woke her up and told her what happen she grabbed me and I cried in her arms and broke down she held me and told me baby I’m so sorry 💔😞 I wish I could of been there for her I wish she would of reached out that day the conversation we had were dark cause we both mentally was fighting through are demons weeks before she keep giving  me stuff that meant alot to her I wish I should of open my eyes and see s I’m so sorry queen I love you 🕊 #Depression #SuicideAwareness #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BP #SuicideLossSurvivors



Does anyone know of a support chat group or something just to chat with other people about what’s going on? Support each other and get support?
#Depression #Anxiety #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #BP


Feeling is important

Failure is the foundation of learning. You don't fail you don't learn

3lvery time that you don't fail you're probably going to fIl harder cuz there's something coming up you don't know.

Every failure is one step closer to succes

. First part of being smart is knowing you're not

#BipolarDisorder #Autism #PervasiveDevelopmentalDisorders
#Anxiety #On #DepressiveDisorders
#codependancy #PTSD


Writers remorse.

Text ed crazy and I didn't mean to to say all that stuff but my mind and my fingers just kind of take up on their own I hope I didn't scare anyone kind of scared myself but I'm better now but my fingers just still can't talk with us worth anything like a huge on my stupid cell phone my fingers just touch barely go over it something and it'll hit a key it's not the right one but I'm doing better right now I'm not I just hyper and we're trying to sleep right now and again I'm sorry and I don't know how to stop the fingers from topping all the stuff that I didn't mean does anyone else have that problem just typing and it won't the wrong letters come up and it doesn't say what you want just it was just doubled me too you see it didn't do it either so if y'all see this I apologize for the earlier crazy texting and I hope everything help it everybody knows that I'm okay now I really am thank you for listening bye #ocdbipolar 2,general a anxiety, get Schitzo effective f effective disorder , the effective disorder, hallucinations of all kinds and delusions are still running around in my mind and I'm doing better than I was in the hospital just to have occasional relapses but I'm doing my best to overcome it I don't want to go back in the hospital please keep me in prayers thank you ( I may still be having side effects from OTC treatment in hoping that it'll go away soon thank you) #erlinePersonalityDisorderBPD #DE ,,oS,RA arthritis, stomach issues,a r dependent psychological disorder pendency. Fears of being abandoned and left with nobody to talk to or help take care of me when I can't and nobody to love me. Vertigo which I am
battleingy right now. Poor self image. And putting those feet in mouth and just move them around. The mouth works before the brain does. # # foot and mouth disease. Brain fog
Chatty Cathy rides again)